Do Your Neighbors Avoid You?

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I am lucky to live on a fairly quiet street in the suburbs. I will however wait until my neighbor goes inside before I check the mail or take out the trash can. I avoid small talk the best I can. Plus, how many times can you say "hey man" to the neighbors that have been there for years and you don't know their name, before it is awkward.

Nope, wouldnt have mentioned it. The direct neighbors beside us, I didnt see that much personally. We have old houses with an wall between the areas, so we can see from our mainlevels into each other gardens because we have wet ground, and so the ground level is the cellar, and above is the mainlevel, so its a bit higher, and we can see into each other gardens. They were a young couple as we are, and so normally we have been all working most of the time, only when they got a baby, I saw the mother with the child more often and talked with them from now and then.

My other direct neighbors are very friendly. I think they first thought that I would be so shy, because of them being from serbia, but after a while they learned, that I am simply very shy about everyone. ^^ Because of him being foreigner he had some troubles with the old neighbors opposite of us (that I never have contact with, besides some grunts I got when I greeted them across the street O_o) and I think he simply is lucky because of us not bothering that much, what they do. So whenever he does some building on his ground we never made any trouble (But the opposite neighbor sued him, when doing so, so an officer came to tell me, that my neighbor build his carport illegal in front of my window, and I had to declare him, that my neighbor asked me if he was allowed to, that this was my toilette window, and that I dont give a f**k about if I have a good view out of my toilette window, because I cant see anyway out of it while sitting and for fresh air it is sufficient. And that I can take care of myself and dont need my opposite neighbor to sue my neighbor, because of him building a carport in front of my toilette window, when I allowed him to do so.), as well when he asked if he could cut some bushes, that were originally from our ground, or if we are ok with him keeping chickens and rabbits, and so on. Additional they sometimes have big grill garden parties with lots of friends and family of them, and grilling of an complete lamb, (so we are being told, when they do so), and we have sometimes on the weekends friends here for LAN-parties, and so tolerate each other. Only half of the border to the neighbor is a wall or wooden buidlings, the rest are high bushes, but you can see above that as well, and at some spots also through the bushes, so there is a chatwindow. ^^

The opposite directly opposite of us is the old gruntler, that never talked to me. Dont know, what problem he has got with me, even before the carport incident, he never exchanged words with me, so I couldnt even get into an arguing with him. O_o

The opposite neighbor at the left is from ex-yugoslavia as well, and they are often visiting our serbian neighbors. I dont have that much contact, beside normal friendly greeting and "Everythings fine?" standard chitchat.

Opposite neighbor at the right is iranian, nice guy, but a bit shy. So the two times he visited me on Sunday afternoon, my partner and I had our lazy days, and it seems that iranian are a bit shy against woman in bathcoats. ^^

On the other side behind our house, there is a small mini-river that you can jump across, and behind that is a hayfield and a little hill with a wood, and behind there, there are normal agrar fields. Because of the hill luckily there is too much shadow for crops, so its only used for hay and the farmer works only for some days there. He dont mind if we cross his field to go into the woods, as long as we care not to do damage, while crossing the field, and we dont blame him if his goddamn organic-shit-blaster messes a third of our garden, if he has a bad-aim-day at fertilizing. XD

Its a little village, so you are supposed to exchange standard "Hello." and "How are you?" with your neighbors, but luckily it is not expected to get into real chatting, if you dont want to.

After a few years in my present location, my neighbors seem to finally be comfortable with me only waving and smiling when I am out for my exercise walks. I once overheard one say to another, "She keeps to herself, but that's ok."

Last edited by PrncssAlay on 17 Jul 2013, 5:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

Yes

I think for me, keeping to myself avoids a bunch of situations and obligations I don't want to deal with. I and my fiance have one neighbor who uses the Specialized NT trick of "Give me an inch, I take a mile" strategy to try to dump her 5-year old daughter on us so she can "Go Out" with her boyfriend. Not to be rude, we just don't have the time for it and of course, she takes offense. Luckily, we have neighbors that are good friends further down and she has an autistic daughter and they know about me. They understand how I am and that's cool.
I usually don't care if someones talking about me or not or think I'm weird, just don't verbally harass me or we have a problem.

My neighbors have been family friends ever since my sister and I were little kids.

However, there are young, snooty couples who live a few houses away from mine. I avoid them like the plague! Recently they had a block party, or as my sister called it "a clique party."

have got a similar situation at mas/pas house to.
their next door neighbours are a older couple,they are highly talkative,dad talks absolute bollox for ages to them about the weather [its the typical aspie and bogger/irish in him],to dad they are great and to a lesser level theyre the same to mum.

however,no matter how many times have been seen by them and how often mum and dad have had to explain to them, they dont have any consideration at all about the disabilities.
whenever am being dropped off by support staff in the motability car [which has a clear 'disabled' tax disc and blue badge on the dash usualy],the neighbours come out ranting about how the car is one inch over the line into there drive and to move the car.
they know exactly how am severely affected in mobility/being out and about by autism and epilepsy and need to be parked as close as possible to the building and cant be parked across the road.
am only being dropped there quickly-they sign medication sheet stuff over to staff and thats it,staff are to kind and move to an awkward area so we can wait for one of the a***holes who hog up all our street to go to the social club and mosque to move.

dad is a pain,he wont say one word to them back because he doesnt like making people react; the by product of being a husband of a veteran alchie.
if am ever out in the wheelchair with mum and they are coming in the opposite direction,they stare and do that 'lets mumble a load of BS to each other whilst looking at them' thing and cross the road when they get near us,then they cross back over and go in their house.
the same twats leave their cars;including their sisters car outside dads when they go on holiday to their villa;sometimes this is three weeks,without even agreeing this with dad,he doesnt say one word.
am completely blanked by them,the christmas cards always said to parents and the other sister; who they know even less.

they not only make it difficult for self to get out at mums/dads,it affects sister; who can never get a safe and wide enough parking spot with her two toddlers and also the other next door neighbour is a full time wheel chair user,has alzheimers and very severe disabilities which involve an ambulance trip every week,they are nearly parking down the street sometimes due to the line of cars owned by these gobshites.

its nice n all being a wheel chair user and having people move out of the way like the waves in that kids book,but am not an unfriendly person,have known them for years and not been spoken to or acknowledged once by them,they dont even acknowledge the fact the people who are driving the car of mine are support staff,maybe they will change their mind when the crelling houdini harness finaly gets bought and they wonder why am sat in what is a straight jacket attached to the wheelchair or car seat.
am not a fan of them because they helped their son scam the government out of twenty seven thousand pound in some sort of benefit or tax to do with housing.

Yeah think it both here. I avoid them and like wise.

I mean they find out pretty quick, when you never have anyone visit, and you "almost" never leave your apartment.

My neighbours on the left:

- Extremely untalkative
- Gossip kings
- Despite of being untalkative they are always extremely curious about us
- Oftenly place one of their ears on the garden wall so they can listen to what we say (we can see it from the window upstairs)
- Always complain to us whenever our plants and trees in our garden are too visible to them from their own garden
- They don't recycle, they just burn their junk in their garden usually on a good weather day when our doors or windows are open so we have to close them to avoid the smell
- We exist to them only when they need something from us
- They are celebrities in our neighbourhood and use that very well against us
- They think our property still partly belongs to them because the house we are in was bought by us from a family member of them
- Probably reading this thread

It's interesting you find neighbours ignoring you offensive? to be honest they are just minding their business...

I think he feels the neighbors are friendly to each other but treat him like he's different or a mystery.

One house side the people are seasonal.
Sometimes our neighbors on the left will talk to us. The wife is paranoid i don't like her, yet i have no problem with them at all. I think its my poor social skills that might make her think that?
My housemate usually takes over all conversations and some of the people here think i am "out there" in lala land or space and probably think i'm slow so they won't bother unless they are drunk or feeling they are supposed to be friendly i guess...

Can't say Ive ever liked a neighbor. Ive recently moved, unfortunately do to harassment, and vandalism to my car. Its only been a month, and i am feeling the hostility, do to my lack of desire to engage these annoying people.

Ha ha ha, that seems to be the way with Aspies! If we do want contact, people turn us away or act unfriendly. If we don't want contact, we attract everyone! Murphy's Law, I think!

I would rather my neighbours just smiled and said "hi" in passing. I don't want them engaging me in conversation. I want to be left alone. My current neighbours don't even say "hi" back to me when I smile and say hello.

happens to me too. i dont want friends, and guess what - i have a woman from work demanding to be my friend even if i clearly show that i dont want to be friends, and a lot of men are sexually attracted to me too.