aylissa wrote:
threesnugbugs wrote:
I have stopped looking and analyzing myself right now because I just don't want to know anymore for awhile. I am concentrating on my son, I just don't want him to struggle so much and get so hurt.
May I gently suggest that the more you understand your own spectrum issues, the better able you might be to understand your son's?
I am a diagnosed aspie with two NT teenage daughters, both of whom have plenty of shadow traits. They got social skills apparently from their Dad, who is gifted socially (which is why I married him
).
It was for the opposite reason I have stopped looking. I have this incredible bond with my DS, and I understand him far too well. I have anticipated his every move and reaction since he was young and I know it is because we are exactly alike. We think in the same way. That combined with the fact that I am an elementary teacher has given my son help without struggle. I stopped looking at myself, because I don't want to go down the road of confusion and unpleasant school years and re-live that and project that to my son. I am putting up all the emotional blocks of my past right now because I can't fall apart if that makes sense. I need to be strong and supportive and make the right choices with my son right now. I know all of my struggles, strengths and weakness and have always been very self aware. It is the emotions that surround my childhood that I don't want anywhere near and I am afraid that since I have always felt very emotional with my children, that if I let that flood gate open, I could never recover. The funny thing is, my children are the only ones I have been open emotionally. I am cold to everyone else in my extended family.