Poor Imagination

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When I was a little child I remember vaguely that I was always talking and creating stories, up until 6 years old, then I don’t know what changed but my imagination dried up.
I loved fantasy books, especially Tolkien’s, for me it were coherent and realistic worlds. It was because I always desired to live in a different world, I always liked the idea of magic, thinking that in a fantasy setting I would been a great mage, someone different, maybe eccentric, but powerful and respected. Viewing myself as weak, an outcast that wasn’t able to fit socially, I spent many years reading fantasy books.

But I’m never been able to create good and original stories. I write a lot, but my passion is history and I write articles and books of non-fiction type, many times I thought about writing a novel, but it was always based on some idea I liked in a movie or a book, like I’m unable to create something really original at the core. In my historical analysis I am creative and original, but it’s a different kind of creativity, I link facts and ideas, I compare societies and people from different times and countries, I find connections that no one have thought of. This is what I am good at.

I also never have the ability to visualize in my head pictures and ideas. Even when I was reading the lord of the rings the characters didn’t have any real appearance for me, but I liked the story anyway. A part from this, I think there is another problem for Asperger people about imagination, and is social interaction. If you have to imagine some kind of story or situation, probably it involves other people, if you don’t understand how “normal” people think an interact, it’s difficult to create a story. And if you create one, it’s not realistic, not for other people at least.
For example I dreamed many many times of dialogues with some girl I like, I imagined what I could say, what she could reply… I played those movies for hours in my head at night and sometimes at day. But, like a woman recently said to me, “it was all in my head”, no one of my fantasies really happened, they never replied like I hoped and dreamed.

I've been told a good part of my life that I have a great imagination. I draw cartoons and make crafts so I guess it shows in that. One problem I've always had was making up something right on the spot. I always have to plan and think ahead. As a kid I could make up my own characters instead of just drawing the ones that were already around like every other kid who could draw was doing, but making up a story or joke that's original was and still is hard. When I read newspaper comics I wonder just how they make up something new and different every single day unless they have writers. When I was younger role-playing with my dolls and stuffed animals would often help me get ideas for stories I'd write down and illustrate.

I don't remember how I played a child, I can't pinpoint exact things. I liked to read. I liked dressing up barbies and I liked the my little ponies I had a lot. But I don't remember what I played with them. I know I played a lot with my older sister (almost 4 years older) and she would come up with imaginative stories. I didn't like what she liked doing the most, pretending to be animals. I was terribly bored by it.

I liked going down the sidewalk in the wagon. I liked the swing. I liked being outside. I loved video games and board games and card games...I loved competition and other things where I could get better at it or be good at it. I was never much for arts and crafts.

I guess I'd imagine being grown up and doing something incredible. I had such aspirations as a child, I was totally driven to be famous in some way shape or form..

I'm imaginative but it's controlled. I have to work at it or else it doesn't much happen, but that can still be a lot of fun too. I wrote a fantasy/sci-fi novel that I think has some pretty unique ideas in it a couple years ago. (not published, still working on that). I liked creative writing at school from a very young age, but I think I may just have liked that because I liked writing out my thoughts...and I guess I still like doing that :-p

My visualization ability is sketchy, I have a hard time keeping an image in my head, it kinda flashes in and out.

I have a much harder time placing MYSELF in unrealistic situations than simply imagining things/others that aren't real.