Why should I feel embarrassed? aspie logic

Post Reply New Topic

1) If you don't give a **** why did you write such a long comment?

2) You don't care what others think of your statuses, why should she think about your opinion and even act upon your advice?

3) Being Asperger and being offensive are two different things. You couldn't overcame Asperger (I don't like the idea as you do) even if you wanted to. Maybe you think: I have Asperger, I can say whatever is on my mind. Well, you can, but I don't suppose you also want to deliberately hurt people, so consider what Norny wrote, I think he explained it nicely.

Aspergers isn't a free pass to be rude to people whenever we feel like it. Other people have feelings too.

As Norny said:

I need to put my sense of humour away because it seems I am the only one thus far who finds what the OP wrote funny...perhaps only in this context as she has already explained that she was just trying to state her opinion, albeit in a slightly clumsy manner (bless), but still. I am guessing she does not like sororities (we don't really have those here in the UK as far as I am aware).

People talk about truth but there are different ways of interpreting what people write, there is no truth, only interpretation...the onus is as much on the reader of the text as it is on the writer and a lot of people forget that. They blame only the person who wrote the words in the first place and never ever their interpretation of those words....!

The reader can also choose how they respond..it's been said to me enough times and well there is something to that. You don't have to take offense if you don't want to. Granted it's not the smoothest expression of disapproval I have ever seen but then without tone of voice the statement may have come across harsher than it was meant to... who knows.

Besides, who is to say that some of what she has writen is not accurate...do sororities remember all of their members once they have left? Obviously those members will remember the sorority as I assume it plays a big role in their college life. However, this does not mean it has to do the same for the OP. All I read is that she does not like sororities and is not interested in joining one and is fed up with seeing mention of them on her facebook page. She sounds a little exasperated with it all to me, but that might just be my interpretation.

Hypothetically, If I were a reader who was also a member of a sorority though, the OPs post would not affect my enjoyment of being a sorority member, if that were my thing, so I'd forgo the offense and just assume the young lady is not into sorority life in the way I was. There is no need to defriend her, that is just over sensitive and a little harsh. She is entitled to not to like sororities after all.

Don't worry about it too much OP, next time just be aware that people can be very sensitive about their sororities (god knows why, but then oftentimes people don't get why I love the paleo diet either so, hmm, humans are strange critters).

You know, I totally agree with that. The offensive-ness was definitely (partly) a misunderstanding.
I know that Asperger's doesnt give me an excuse to be rude. but it does make it harder to tell when I am doing or saying something that may be perceived as rude.
In my subsequent Facebook status I tried to apologize and explain; I said the following (copied and pasted straight from Facebook):

this is a Public Service Announcement. some of you may have noticed that i have been posting statuses that have been perceived as rude, inconsiderate, mean, or just plain bitchy.

***i want to apologize to anyone whose feelings i may have hurt or injured.***

i also want to offer an explanation for my innappropriate Facebook statuses. This is not an excuse for my behavior. I was in the wrong and I understand that. But I want others to understand the method to my madness, so to speak.

I have Aspergers Syndrome. I know Aspergers has often been distorted by the media and the internet, so, through no fault of their own, people sometimes have misconceptions about what it really is. Aspergers is a lot of things; it's a lot more complicated than it seems on the surface.

People with Aspergers, including me, are literal-minded, blunt-speaking, and unaware of social norms. We dont comprehend other people's points of view, because our perspectives seem, to us, to be the only ones that make sense. We have impaired communication skills. We are usually very intelligent, but we have difficulty understanding others and making ourselves understood. Think of it as a faulty radio signal: the person with Aspergers transmits and receives messages that come across differently than intended.

I just want people to understand that I did not intend to offend anyone when I said various things on Facebook. That was only my Aspergers making itself known in my faulty communication skills. I hope you dont think any worse of me because of what I said. Please stay friends with me, and dont unintentionally discriminate against me because of my Aspergers!