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RadiationHazard
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20 Apr 2007, 8:58 am

I've had near meltdowns. I'm aware of my actions, but I lost all control. What usually transpires, is my being sprawled on the floor weeping. Always severe sadness and depression for me. Oddly this is the same for Anger meltdowns. I'm a very non-violent person. Sure I'll smack my dog when she's misbehaving(rare), or defend myself, but emotional meltdowns just leave me on the floor.

I get panic attacks on occasion. Last one I got left me unable to stand and that was after an arguement with my dad.


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20 Apr 2007, 9:21 am

Well, I never loose control and I always remember what I did/do. Its just sadness and or anger, but not some other state



SeriousGirl
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20 Apr 2007, 10:23 am

I have crying storms that feel overwhelming sometimes. It is caused from frustration and anger turned inward. I wasn't allowed to be aggressive as a child so mine is always turned inward.


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20 Apr 2007, 10:38 am

I sometimes "overload" too. My mind fills with a log jam of images and words, like data being crammed into a buffer that would not hold it all. The sounds all blur together, my vision is unable to focus on any specific object - its sensory overload. I often find I just stare in to space until it passes.



scrulie
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20 Apr 2007, 10:48 am

Oh yes. i have meltdowns. I know when the meltdown feeling starts to come over me and sometimes I can take action of some kind to stop myself going over the edge (losing control) and sometimes I can't.


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scrulie
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20 Apr 2007, 10:50 am

9CatMom wrote:
I don't think I ever had the traditional AS meltdown.

What do people consider a traditional meltdown?


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danlo
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20 Apr 2007, 10:58 am

Yeah, I don't have meltdowns anymore either. As a kid, I used to have them all the time, but I'm able to avoid them now. I think it causes me to forget. Things that would overload me get forgotten along with events surrounding it, so I need a lot of things coming at me at once to cause me to meltdown.


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20 Apr 2007, 10:58 am

When I feel backed in a corner during an argument with someone and they won't back off or if I'm really freaked out about something, I shut down. I can't feel a damn thing and feel hollow inside. The only thing I want to do is go to sleep. I wouldn't care if you told me my best friend had just died. I've been that way for as long as I can remember. Is this a meltdown? I always though it was dissociation.

I also have periods, sometimes out of the blue, where I feel completely detached from the rest of the world - like I'm not really here but just an observer. Kind of like there's an invisible wall between me and the rest of the world. Anyone else ever experience this?



richardbenson
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20 Apr 2007, 11:12 am

only when i drink. wich i hope i never do again :D



markaudette
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20 Apr 2007, 11:26 am

I think the kernel, the central thing, of any meltdown is frustration.

Oh yeah, I've had several meltdowns in my time. Dealing with my addict mother or dealing with the pressure of marrige have led me to have a few stress related meltdowns over the years. And like I said, it has to deal with this frustration that keeps getting more and more concentrated the longer I went without being able to adequately deal with the stress. And in time the stress and frusrtation would build up until there was no way I could deal with it any longer. And it's like filling up a balloon. There's only a finite amount of something you can fit into a balloon until it bursts. And that's what a meltdown is. You become as full as you can get with stress and frustration and then you just pop. You just explode.

And when I have a meltdown, I'd get very mad and cause a scene by throwing things around, punching the walls, cussing up a storm, yelling and storming away in a huff. But what I'm not trying to do is to hurt anyone else. I'm literally just trying to vent all the frustration out of my system. And frustration comes out as anger in me. Or a bothersome emotion. So I get really angry. And once the the cork's out of the bottle, what's inside has to go SOMEWHERE. So I have meltdown, make an ass out of myself and go away until I can regain my compsure enough to go sulking back to apologize. Because having a meltdown is very embarrassing to me. It's like making myself out to be an ass.

And the relationship I had with my mother was an ugly one. When I got very, very frustrated (which was most of the time) I would kind of come unglued and act as if I've come unhinged a bit. And she would just pounce onthat and make the situation worse for us both. I would get more and more stressed out and she would begin to make fun of me. And then after I had a full-on meltdown, she would ridicule me for making myself out to look like an idiot. And that was also very embarrassing.

So I just try to stay away from all the elements that cause me a lot of frustration. Which has changed a lot about how I do things, who I see or where I go. I try to stay in an environment that is safe for me. So I won't have another embarrassing meltdown.



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20 Apr 2007, 1:58 pm

i 19 and have big meltdown with get really mad and scream and kick and hit. and get out of control .



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20 Apr 2007, 2:24 pm

This is really interesting - I have had meltdowns for many years, normally related to complex heavy social situations.

A great book on this is "Asperger Syndrome and Difficult Moments: Practical Solutions for Tantrums, Rage and Meltdowns" by Brenda Smith Myles.

My thesis is on what is happening for me, and how to progress, is on http://unlearningasperger.blogspot.com - I'd welcome any feedback.

All the very best
JC



MrSinister
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20 Apr 2007, 3:02 pm

I tend to get them when things overwhelm me, or when I get an overload of information. What tends to make them worse, is, paradoxically, people trying to make it better, because that's just more cognitive information I don't need. Which is pretty much the reason why I don't talk a lot if I'm feeling close to a meltdown.

People crowding me doesn't help, either.


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20 Apr 2007, 3:12 pm

I dont think I get melt downs as much as I did before I found out I had AS; I feel generaly happier now I now why I am the way I am. My meltdowns range from total self absorbtion to the exclusion of all else where I just cant function, to verbal aggresion directed at anything and anyone. Having said that, I still have minor meltdowns, no where near the intensity I used to have.


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kittenfluffies
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20 Apr 2007, 3:18 pm

Last week I had to go to a meeting in another office with a bunch of people I didn't know....

Hmmm...let's see...

* New environment
* Strangers
* People talking
* People seated behind me
* Tiny room
* Weird lighting

= MELTDOWN! 8O

I was also sick that day. I had to go home when the meeting was over. I left without saying anything to anyone.


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Elemental
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20 Apr 2007, 5:46 pm

I had meltdowns fairly often when I was younger, but they're more and more rare since I turned 20--the last one I can remember when I would consider myself "out of control" was when I was about 18.

Generally, I'm good at spotting the signs of a build-up and either isolating myself or putting myself in a less stressful situation. When I do go over the top now, it's usually more like a very focused, cold rage at whatever prompted it.