Need help, was I in the wrong?

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Hi, I'm going to get right to it so here goes...

Thursday, I picked up a prescription for my Father. I remind him to pick it up the following day and leave it on the arm of the couch. Friday completes itself with the prescription still there... Saturday, I remind him again and say "Dad, do not blame me for not picking your prescription up if Mum asks why!"... Sunday, I remind him again and he still does NOT pick it up...

Monday, still there and doesn't pick it up despite being off work.

Tuesday (today)... My Mum enters my room and wakes me up abruptly despite only having been asleep for four hours: "Where is your Dad's prescription!?"
"Where it's been for the last four days... On the arm of the couch"
"Right."
I get up, grumpy and pissed off.. The prescription still sits there, somewhat irritated I ask my Mum "Why did you ask me where the prescription was when Dad knew where it was? He asked me where it was days ago and it hasn't moved."
"Your Dad said that you'd probably been up to your tricks." She was implying that I'd been tidying (the house is frequently littered with clutter and sometimes I move it) although on this occasion I hadn't.

I don't understand why my Dad would blame me when I did everything right. I picked up his prescription. I left it in an openly visible spot, I reminded him to pick it up and pointed out where it was and he has walked past it at least a good 50 times. Being highly angry that I was woken up and then blamed for something that wasn't my fault and was evidently due to my Father's laziness I ripped up his prescription and disposed of it to teach him a lesson in hopes that he would not replicate such arrogance in the future.

After around 30 minutes of my Dad looking for it (he was never going to find it, when I do a job I do it thoroughly) my Mum went to the rescue and managed to get him a duplicate. I asked my Dad if he learned a lesson and he said no.

Whilst he was looking for it he took out a large heavy duty pair of scissors from the kitchen, I didn't really think much of this but when I looked he was stood next to my motorbike and seemed to be fettling but he'd just finished doing whatever he was doing by the time I looked over.

I just thought I'd add that extra paragraph on at the end in case the bike has been tampered with and a freak accident occurs.

So what I'd like to know is, was I in the wrong here by destroying something that is not mine but has no value and is easily replaceable in order to make a stand? My parents were furious but you can only poke and prod an animal into a corner for so long until it claws at you... At least in my case...

Oh I just thought I'd add. I'm not posting this because I already think I'm in the wrong. I have no one else to ask as I have no friends and if I did I wouldn't ask them any way so I may as well ask you guys.

Brutally honest replies would be nice, if you think I'm a C#$T say so, likewise for anything else.

It would have been much better if you'd given the prescription to you father, rather than leave it somewhere for him. You weren't really in the wrong as such, but if you know you father would probably forget it, it would have been better to "accommodate" that by physically putting it in his hands.

It was wrong to rip up the prescription. I understand the frustration, but ripping it up was the wrong thing to do.

Do you move people's stuff around? Sometimes what looks like clutter to you may be there for a reason. I'm pretty untidy around the house, but I know where stuff is, so if I look for something and it's not where I left it, its very annoying and sometimes extremely inconvenient. If some bit of "clutter" is in the way or you think it should be somewhere else, always as the person it belongs to if you can move it, and if so, where should it go.

It sounds a a classic escalation of a small issue into a big one, due to pad behaviour on both sides I think. to run through what happened :-

1. You put the prescription on the couch instead of giving it to him. ( innocent mistake )

2. He didn't pick it up ( careless mistake )

3. You reminded him about it but still didn't get it and give it too him. ( understandable, but given you know his habits, probably not the best course of action )

4. He still didn't pick it up. ( careless, again)

5. You ripped it up. ( over the top escalation of the problem.. this was wrong )

6. You didn't tell him when he was then looking for it ( childish escalation, and not at all fair on him )

7. He then tampered, or a appeared to tamper with your bike ( utterly over the top, and quite dangerous escalation. very childish and completely wrong. )

8. You mum not stepping in to get the prescription and give it to your dad ( poor judgement on her behalf. She should have known the problem could escalate, and resolved it. )

9. Your mum accusing you of being "up to your tricks again". ( insensitive and unnecessarily unclear, given she presumably know your issues. )

10. Result.. frustration and anger all round.

11. posting on this forum, to help you figure out what happened.. ( Absolutely the right thing to do!

Looking back through this list.. look at which points YOU could have stopped it escalating. basically 1 and 3.

Sooo. you were all in the wrong in the end, but not to start off with.

The lesson from all this :-

Sometimes it's not about who's in the right and who's in the wrong. Even if you think someone else is in the wrong ( you dad not picking up the prescription ) you're still have the power to stop things escalating as they did.

I don't think your a c**t. You were just frustrated and acted on emotion. However, my question is, do they charge you rent to live there? According to your avatar you are 20 years old. According to your post you don't necessarily keep the house very tidy. Just keep in mind that based on these two previous statements they already put up with a lot from you. It's not all about you. Parents have quirks too. But it is their house, not yours. Therefore, you need to cut them much more slack and recognize the slack they cut you. You wanted honest, there you have it.

Yes, you were wrong to rip up the prescription.

Why? It wasn't t yours to destroy. It didn't help you because it was not an effective way of "teaching them a lesson." It didn't help your dad to manage things better next time.

It sounds like your parents are incompetent and abusive and have taught you poor coping skills. If at all possible, you should plan to get away from them as soon as possible.

If your dad avoids his meds and doesn't deal with this kind of thing and then your mom asks you to be responsible, turn the tables and give the things to her when you get them. Ask her where to put them.

If you are angry at your interrupted sleep, wait until you have calmed down and then tell your mom that you really need your sleep and it would be better to wait until the next day for something like this. If your dad has avoided taking medication for four days another few hours is not going to make a difference.

There are probably lots of ways that you could try to make your interactions with these people better, but considering their bad behavior, the whole family system sounds toxic for you. If at all possible, get independent and get away. If you can't do that, forget all about trying to teach them a lesson by doing things you know will piss them off. Just focus on trying to make your life better and minimizing the damage their incompetent life skills will expose you to.

Good luck.

That sounds exactly what I would do, so I would have to agree and say whilst it wadn't a nice thing to do, it wasn't a wrong thing to do

People have already explained why it was wrong, but yes it was.

Perhaps if you had picked the prescription slip up, you could pick the medication/prescription up too, instead of this happening

Thank you everyone for your responses, in particular Adamantium. You were very insightful and have helped me realise how I could maybe avoid future situations escalating.. You also made a great summary of what I was trying to say too. Thanks to all of you for your in depth responses.

The situation is still unresolved and I am yet to find out if my motorbike has been tampered with or it was just to paranoy me. I've tested the front and rear brake and they work.. Now I just need to find my keys (someone has hidden them, I wonder who) and I can test the ignition.

Once again, I can't tell you how much all of you have helped. Thank you so much.

I hope nothing was done to your bike.

Good luck with your situation.