What were you like as a toddler and what are you like today?

Post Reply New Topic

I am very curious what you (or your child) were like as toddlers (symptoms/biggest struggles) and what you are like today (symptoms/biggest struggles).

Since my son was diagnosed a year ago with ASD I have tried to get an idea of what life might be like when he is an adult. I realize that diagnosis and prognosis often diverge greatly as time goes on- nevertheless, I want to think if I hear enough stories about what you were like as toddlers and what you are like now, I could piece together a picture of what my son might be like as an adult.

If you were wondering, my son when diagnosed at 3 years of age had a vocabulary of 100 words. Today, one year later, his vocabulary has grown and he uses sentences more ofter. He appears to me to have a difficult case of ADHD, deficits in social and communication areas, but very few (if any) restrictive behavior, sensory issues or repetitive behavior (actually, he does "flop" around when he is challenged to pay attention- but so do I to a lesser extent with my own ADHD struggles). His ability to fantasy play is and has always been impressive- this is something we never had to help him with. While his vocabulary is probably around 500 words and growing, he has never really asked me any question and shows limited interest in the past or future (however, he is very social and wants to be around people playing all the time). For what it is worth, I sometimes question the autism diagnosis and think social communication disorder fits him better- but that is probably because I do not really understand how repetitive behavior manifests in person.

when i was a toddler, i was... weird, just very weird, I was off in my own world, clumsy, and my face was just blank and emotionless.

Theres a video of me when i was two, and half of the video was my cousins and sister playing and i was walking around alone talking to myself. Theres another part where my dad would trace my feet on a piece of paper and cut them out (my favorite thing to do up until i was 8 ) and i wanted my dad to cut it out, but my dad wanted me to cut it out to improve my cutting skills, he ended up cutting it for me, but as soon as he did i started crying and saying "YOU CUTTING IT!' and my dad would say "dont you want me to cut it?"and i would say 'yeah...' and that went on for 3 minutes. Theres another part of the video where im talking all the clothes out of my closet and putting them in my door way, this didnt happen occasionally, this happened EVERY night.

apparently i had a lot of issues Toilet Training, feeding myself, Sleeping and playing with my cousins, who were around the same age as me. I made little to no eye contact and was Repetitive.

now, i guess im better? i just hang around the house and eat and watch TV and Play video Games.

When I was a toddler, I wouldn't talk much, and I was much more hyper and curious. I also had the tendency to wander a lot and get myself into dangerous situations (I once got inside a neighbor's rabbit cage when I was three). I also refused to sleep, be potty-trained, or eat my vegetables, and am prone to tantrums.

Now, I am more social, cautious, eat better, and manage my stress better.

Hmm...I am female, was developmentally delayed (coordination and speech) still by 2. I walked late and motor skills were poor. I had my first words by age 2 (I had a total vocabulary of 10 words, no two word sentences) I could not use those words to ask for something. I could not talk in sentences until around 3.5, I had to be prompted.

I was touch and taste hypersensitive, visually distracted. As a child I was undersensitive to pain and temperature. I was often under the couch cushions for deep pressure.
At home I was content to "play" doing some repetitive activity alone for hours (like stacking blocks). I did not go to my mom to play with her (limited play).

At the doctor's, I would play alongside a kid but not with them.
As for playing or talking to other kids, I ignored them completely until I was older.
By age 5 I was talking repetitively.

Now I am getting assistance with learning daily skills on my own (cooking, cleaning self, laundry, dishes, daily routine)
Real difficulty learning social skills
Very limited coping skills (for example, hurt myself when frustrated, touch instead of talk).
Require some supervision for volunteering.
Disabled (unable to begin work or support myself in any way, so far)
Sensory is huge for me. (must have some textured hand stimulation toy, noise reducing headphones and sunglasses when out). Sensory stimulation in ways I love helps my behavior a lot.
My communication ability relies heavily on my emotions at any time.
Self still talks repetitively. Am happy even though I have limited understanding of some abstract "basic" things.

I forgot to mention my Sensory Issues, I had auditory Issues mostly, i couldnt listen to Airplanes without having a Sensory Overload or Listen to the THX thing. I can tolerate those things now.

i say dont give up Hope, not all, but some kids develop very very well, Temple Grandin started off quite severe. I know a kid in my old neighbour who had limited speech and was very Distant, now he plays with other kids and can have a full conversation.

My parents forced me to do a lot of things, eventually i had to feed myself, go to the toilet and go to school. Dont use your sons Autism as a way to say 'he cant do these things'. There will be tantrums, meltdowns and shut downs but if you dont do it, hell be in diapers forever.

I was supposedly an unholy terror! Among other things, breaking a wooden chair over my older brothers head as he sat watching TV. Very reckless with myself as well, diving onto concrete, etc.

Then at age seven I became an angel. I followed instructions, was very respectful and excelled at school.

I shifted again around age 16 and once again sought out the most dangerous experiences.

I shifted back around age 27 and have been relatively stable since.

My guess is that while you might see the beginning of some personality threads in a toddler, it is far from enough to make any practical predictions. There are I think, too many variables, like trying to predict your local weather 15 years from now. The result will be the sum of many interactions and events but it can be your guidance, one event at a time as they occur, that can be a main steering current.

I was a typical toddler, reached all the milestones at the average stages, and didn't seem to have any issues with mixing with other children at preschool. Well I think I might have been a little shy but some toddlers are anyway and it wasn't enough to be peculiar about. I wasn't delayed in speech, I was just average really, and I was fully potty-trained before I was 3 (my mum said I was actually easier with the potty-training than my NT brother was).

My ASD is so mild that nobody recognised it before I started school. To cut a long story short, I got diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome when I was 8. But each year at primary school, the teachers noticed an improvement in my behaviour and social skills, and by the time I was at High School obviously my behaviour was under control and I developed a lot of self-awareness and mostly blended in with the other kids, and through my years at High school (age 11-16) I felt myself improving in confidence. I was timid and nervous when I was in the first year of High School and I was afraid to break any rules. Then when I got to my last two or three years of High school I began to feel more confident and didn't care if I got a detention, and I tried my hardest to fit in by conforming to the other kid's standards. I still struggled socially, as I do have Asperger's, but I still improved an awful lot.

As an adult I am obviously high-functioning, but I have been having very intense emotions in the past few years, like depression, anxiety, guilt, anger and jealousy. I was beginning to wonder what was the point in my existence, and kept thinking that suicide would be my only escape. After trying CBT and counselling and other things that are supposed to help, I found I still wasn't feeling better about myself, so I had to go on anti-depressants as a last resort. The doctor prescribed me with Sertraline, and I have been taking 25mg for a month now and I have felt a big improvement in my self-esteem and mood since I've been on them. I've been able to look at life more positively, feel better about myself, and not dwell on the small things so much (well, small things what seemed big to me). I still get quite anxious and agitated, but I can still cope with things better than I used to. And I don't feel depressed at all, and I haven't cried since I gone on Sertraline either. Sometimes I feel sad about things, but not depressed. I know depression and sadness can mean the same thing but not always. Sadness is just a mild sort of emotion I feel about things that would make most people sad. Depression was like a mental illness to me, causing me to just cry all the time and generated anger and all that sort of thing.

I was classically autistic toddler with strong autistic traits all-around.
At home, I was high-functioning as in not a problem child as long as I got to do what I wanted to do, which were to stack blocks, draw pictures, and read hyperlexically.
At preschool, I was low-functioning with many bathroom-related and other problems all-around.
Now, I am all-around high-functioning, but my autistic traits are still strong, but I have found my own ways to do most things, and some of my autistic traits helped me learn things in my ways and do things in my ways.

As a toddler I spent hours twirling a string in-front of my eyes, walked in circles and talked to myself a lot. I spoke well and had a good vocabulary. I recited stories verbatim that were read to me or I listened to on audio books, repeatedly recited them (that might have been preschool age, though). I had stuffed monkey toys which I placed in a circle and then sat in the middle of the circle. Munkala was my favourite stuffed monkey, small and white and was at the head of the circle. Car monkey was next to Munkala, there were also Frieda and Velcro Monkey in the circle. I enjoyed unfolding socks after my mum folded them and laying them out individually. I did not like going places and threw tantrums in crowded, noisy places. I was not engaged with people and was described in preschool, which I guess was a year later as being in "my own little world" and having "strange behaviour". I didn't listen , was inattentive and didn't make much eye contact. When picked up I was rigid and didn't mold to my mum's arms , she said, but maybe that's more in infancy.

Now I still do my main stim, twirling dangly things in front of my eyes but at home, in private (sometimes in front of my mum but noone else). It took me until the end of elementary school to learn not to do it in public. I have a need for sameness in a lot of things which is still annoying to my family. I have odd, awkward body language and "mannerisms" and have problems with people but I am much more engaged and responsive. I have two friends, I didn't have any friends in elementary school. I have a Bachelor's degree and am doing my Library school degree part-time now but I still live at home and am dependent on my mum at present. I'm 29 years old.

The parents who already gave up on their young children will create self-fulfilling prophecy.
The good thing that my parents did for me was push me to become more capable and go out of my comfort zone, and I also had natural drive towards these.

What was I like as a toddler?

By toddling stage a lot had already happened in my life. At six months of age, my married parents decided to divorce and dropped me off at an orphanage, refused to tell my grandparents where I was, telling them "She's dead to you, you'll never see her again".

Two foster homes later I ended up at another orphanage at age one year (very abusive, strong visual and emotional memories) - (the memories were so vivid that I was able to find the building again in adulthood by describing the dining room furniture and features and the view from the window) and then released by the state into the adoptive "care" of psychopathic weirdos who wanted a female child with "married parents and no black blood".

So by toddlership I had already had many experiences and very little care. In the weirdos' home, I sat: wouldn't walk, wouldn't talk. I just sat and stared at them. I remember this. I have an eidetic memory. I can remember detailed features of rooms from very early infancy.

The weirdos took me to a doctor as they thought I was intellectually handicapped. The doctor didn't think so; he said "She doesn't want to walk or talk to you. Give her time".

When I decided to walk and talk, there were no middle stages. I didn't crawl, I just stood up and tottered along. I started to speak in roughly formed sentences, not single words. I taught myself to read with the help of a lady who lived up the street at 3 years old.

When I was 8, my grandmother - through an astonishing coincidence - found me because she recognised me in the street. (I have a distinctive brown mark in one of my green eyes). When she spoke to me "Do you know who I am?" - I recognised her voice from infancy (she had a distinctive Scots accent). Memory of it sprang from my memory banks. The joy!! ! My heart rose in my chest like a flying bird, and I could see the joy in her face. No-one had ever looked at me with love before that day. What a day it was!! !

She had searched for all those years. I was not allowed any contact with my family by the psychos though in adulthood I formed great reunions with my cousins, uncle, and distant members of my family. By then my grandmother had died. But she never forgot me and often talked about the wondrous day her prayers were answered and she found out that I was still alive.