Bullied

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So I go to an all girls school. I only have one friend and that's wavering a bit and everyone keeps bullying me. They yell at me, throw stuff at me, call me names, laugh at me and so on. I'm beginning to tip over. I'm only 16 and have been at risk of depression before and I feel like that again I don't feel like I can't talk to anyone in my family or anyone at school I just need some help I don't know what to do anymore!

I'm sorry you're going through this. You don't deserve this.

Perhaps you could report it to your dean? Maybe nothing will get done now--but if you report it enough, maybe they'll start taking it seriously.

Do you go to a boarding school?

There are people on this site who have been bullied as well (including myself).

I'm sure people will "come out of the woodwork" and offer you great advice. Aspies know how it feels to be bullied.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 16 May 2014, 9:20 am, edited 1 time in total.

As someone who was constantly bullied in school and outside of school, this is what I recommend:

Talk to your family. Talk to your doctor. Talk to a school counselor. Talk to teachers. Find someone to talk to. Let people know this is going on.

If you can, you can let them know in a way that inherently makes them want to help, even if they wouldn't normally.

Start by asking them for advice on what to do about being bullied. They may dismiss you or some other adverse reaction, but by asking them for their input and help, most people are fine with offering advice.

If they give advice that doesn't do anything. Go back and ask for more and let them know you tried, and it didn't work.

If they start off saying they don't know what to do, ask them who to go see.

You're getting them to think about you in a way that they think they are helping.

None of this may pan out, but you've created connections, and raised awareness.



Keep a journal of how you feel. No one may ever see this journal, but if anything really bad happens, it can be used as evidence for different things, even in court.

Document everything. If you or your friend are able to, record it with video or even just sound. Write down the date and time, and names of those who bullied, and those who witnessed and a description of what occurred. Should anything happen that goes beyond the low-level bullying, stuff that would bring the police in, this will be invaluable to getting justice.

Basically CYA(Cover your ass) Even if you can't make them stop and it hurts, because it will.

Don't respond in kind to the bullies.
Don't associate with them beyond the minimum.
Don't lower yourself to their level.
Don't take out your frustrations on something outside the situation such as family, friends, or animals. Inanimate objects are okay within reason. I bought a punching bag and gloves to take out my frustrations and reduce stress. I also would exercise as a way of coping.
Find something outside of school that you can do and do it. School will end. It doesn't last forever.

And most of all, don't give up.

))))big hugs((((

Bullying make school a living hell, I know no easy answers just try and remember the world is not all like that.

I got bullied a lot in school as well. By the time I was 14, like you, I was at my wit's end. I didn't want to go to school, I didn't want to go to choir. I felt like everything I joined outside of school had the same problems. It was rough.

What other people in this thread have told you to do is great advice: talk to a parent, write down your feelings, talk to a councelor, try to associate less with the people who are being mean to you, talk to a school administrator, most importantly find an adult that you can trust and talk to them. Nothing makes getting bullied worse than not having someone in your corner cheering you on, so it's important to make at least one connection first, then another, and another, and so on.

The thing I wish I could have told 14-year-old me the most is this:
This situation you're in right now is not your fault, and it won't last forever. One thing that sucks about being a kid is that we're put into these uber controlled social situations, where someone else's idea of 'proper social behavior' can become law. Being an adult is NOT like that. Sure, if someone on the street finds me weird they will walk away, but if someone harasses me on the street the punishment is jail time or a restraining order, none of this you-two-have-to-sit-together-until-you-become-friends bull.

Anyway, now I'm rambling. All I'm trying to say is that so long as you don't give up on yourself things can get much better. I'm really glad that I stuck it out. Life has only been getting better for me since my low-point at age 14.

I'd second the suggestions to talk to people about the bullying (and your thoughts about depression if you can), and to keep a diary of bullying incidents to help explain and use as evidence if need be.

I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through this. Please do not think you deserve any of it.
The same thing happened to me, by the time I was 15 I was a total wreck, ended up dropping out of school and attempting suicide.
Please try your hardest to make someone listen to you, this should not be happening at all, but you should not have to deal with it alone.

Totally agree. Yes, 16 is when it usually starts to turn around and for me 12-15 was the absolute worst. Fern is right, in the adult world they can be either arrested for assault or harassment or you can sue them for defamation. You are welcome to talk to any of us WP regulars: I have been through it and know exactly how awful and powerless you feel and that you feel things will never get better. I assure you they will. I can also tell you from being around College students very frequently that bullying is practically nonexistant among the 18+ crowd at least in the sadistic fashion you are experiencing.

I recently ran into a girl who bullied me in school at my workplace. I will never forget the look on how face and they said "(first name?) (first and last name?) is that really you??" and she had a stunned look on her face. Did I mention four of my coworkers were simultaneously looking for my expert advice from me at the same time? She looked like she has done some hard drugs and/or hard time and I could tell she was absolutely miserable and unemployed. Bet she never saw that coming! I will NEVER forget the look on her face and that the "wuss" kid turned into a highly successful leader!

Bully Online is a useful website, welcome to WP, hope things improve for you now.

Hi EllaCatherine. Welcome to wrong planet. I am so sorry this is happening to you! I was bullied at an all girls high school as well, so I know some of what you're going through and it is not easy. A lot of us here were bullied at some point. I hope that WP can be a place where you will feel comfortable.

Are there any teachers or staff members at your school that you can talk to, or that you feel comfortable talking to? Unfortunately it might not stop the bullying right away or anything, but I feel that it is a really good idea that some people know what is going on, even if it is only the school nurse. It is ok if you don't feel comfortable doing that, but it is really important that someone, especially an adult, knows what is going on.

One last thing, keep in mind that you are a precious gift to the world, any you have a place and a role to play in the world that no one but YOU can fill! Hang in there! It will get better soon!
(((hugs)))

Hi everybody,
Thanks for the replies. I don't go to boarding school. I was diagnosed at 14 as we couldn't get and earlier diagnoses (I was at risk of depression). Currently I have told the teachers and my mum. I feel like the teachers are now getting bored of listening to it. I'm just ignoring everybody at the moment but as soon as I get rid of one bully just a little two more come along. Two people in my home room are now starting it. And the people who have been dealt with keep on doing it. There's this one girl where when she got dealt with now she comes up to me all the time and blames me for what she did. She says it's my fault and she crys and tells everybody I've been bullying her! Which I have not I am way to rule bound. Did this happen to any body else? Sometimes I just feel like screaming at the world and crying all the time. Nothing good ever happens and I just don't know anymore.

Yes especially when you are 6'4" at age 13. The regular teachers were very aware of what was being done to me (they acted like they did not though) but it worked great in gym class or with substitutes. The two worst bullies were short and scrawny but knew how to put on the charm and pit a fake smile or tears on. Go figure they both work in commission sales.