Why don't you just? Complex Way or the "Simple Fix"

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It's like waving a red flag at a bull. They feel like they need to assert their own knowledge and their own will over yours.

mr_bigmouth_502: the fact that aspies see the sets of details I think is a major part of the struggle for me. It may be appropriate in some situations like a scientific investigative situation where I could be sifting through a lot of complex processes and it is an asset to have someone whose mind can (and wants to) follow all the detailed threads. But it seems that in everyday life, where I'm just trying to fix basic problems, my mind goes on that "scenic route" of following all the possible threads of a problem, instead of just seeing the main point of it and addressing it to fix it.

My horrible experiences at gardening work is making more sense now, too. I was out there with the mindset of a botanist or a horticulturist, examining, detailing, testing, and all they wanted was the crops grown and picked. Simple and straightforward.

Another example was at a garage sale. I had a broken guitar and someone was asking about it even though I was just keeping it there for someone who had already bought it.

Some movers had crushed the body and forced the top wood away from the body. I told the guy (who was with his girlfriend) what instrument techs had told me, that it wasn't repairable, but that I was always considering that I could put wood glue on it and do a reasonable fix, even if not a complete repair. And I added that I just hadn't gotten around to it because <here comes the details that make other people angry> I needed to get wood clamps to hold it correctly while drying, since the edge here is so thin, it would be hard to hold the join? and the guy got practically livid with me.

He was in his early 20's and the scorn and derision on his face was what I meet with often in these situations. "You don't need to get wood clamps, just get a vise to hold it down while it dries and it'd be fine." It's that attitude that "it's not that big of a problem, don't get all fancy about it, dufus" - it's almost verbal assault. I felt I was being attacked by this guy at my garage sale because of how he was acting toward me.

Never really sure how to respond in those situations, because he could be right, it could be a simple fix, but he doesn't know and I don't know, and the girlfriend he's trying to impress by attacking me doesn't know until I actually try it whether it is that simple or not. So I don't understand why running alternate scenarios in my head about what I'd need to do is such an issue with other people. OK, so I'm making it complicated. But I don't even know this guy - why does that matter to him? What is it to them? I could say pixies are going to be fixing it next week with Atlantic ivy and buttercup lotion - what do they care?

A lot of people don't really understand the idea of taking something broken and fixing it instead of throwing it away.

For some reason, I like seeing mechanical and technical gadgets get a renewed lifespan. I'm not into computer repair work as intensely as you describe, but I was really happy to successfully replace the logic board in a G3 iBook. I did that back in like 2007. It still works great, and I mostly use it for writing documents and listening to music with iTunes. And recently was even able to plug into the net through its Ethernet port and set up the email accounts to work. I keep trying the wireless, but I think the AirPort wireless card is protocol 802.11g and isn't able to process the signals currently used for wi-fi.

I experience problems both ways. But, either way, my way of seeing the problem and solving it often baffles others.

Sometimes, I can summarize a big idea or problem & solution in one sentence and people then try to retell me about the complications. In these situations, it is because I saw a pattern and was able to use that pattern to summarize and quickly solve the problem.

Other times, I get bogged down in all the little details. Usually, when I get bogged down in these, it is because I am concerned that one little detail will mess up the whole thing. When someone tells me the answer is simple, I don't believe it because I need to know *why* each and every single detail I thought about does not make a difference. If someone is willing to explain how the details do or do not matter, I feel more settled about their solutions. It would take me more time on my own to sort through all the details.

They see the 5 minute solution, and not the 30 it takes for me to take care of all the fallout of their simple fix.

And they kind of sneer at you like they're thinking, "you idiot, anyone can see this is the fastest, quickest way to fix this." Or if you do it their way, and run into a major problem issue that they didn't mention, they'll say, "everybody knows you can't do this without?" and mention something obvious that supposedly the whole world knows you have to do first before doing the other thing they wanted you to quickly do.

(edited subject line: it let me type it, then truncated. hmmm.)

and even hack the bios on my graphics card to run underclocked.

Underclocking! Respect!

I "complexify" the (seemingly to others) simple, and I simplify the (seemingly to others) complex/complicated.
Someone else might see ten things as being different-yet I might consider all those things to be variations on the same theme, with negligible distinctions.
Someone else might see ten things as being the same-yet I consider them to be far more complex and varied, not easily reducible or put in single category.

NT's think they are seeing the global picture but no, they are just seeing a small set of the biggest most obvious details, and ignoring the rest. It's a delusion. And they dare to patronise us about it!

Then, surprise, after 3 days it is only just started. So the boss is on the phone to the client making up lies about why it is not finished, and everyone is stressed.

Are you by any chance a programmer?