About other people's opinions

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I'm just wondering, do you guys care much about what people think of you?

I, myself, don't care much about what people think of me. And by people I mean people in general, not people who are close to you (friends, family, people who matter).
I have plenty of friends (they are NT) and it seems like what people think of them means so much to them that sometimes it stops them from being who they are or doing things they like.
I find it very weird.

I'd like to know what you guys think of this.

I wouldn't say I care too much about what people think of me....but I do try to make a good impression on people.

A human mental defense is to attempt to not care about what it feels it cannot change.

Do we truly "not care" or is it a rationalization?
Is it half and half? (or some other ratio)

I would assume that someone initiating or even answering this question would care more than they might admit, even to themselves.

Caring what others think is an important social/survival issue.

Social/survival instincts are supposedly impaired in individuals with ASD, so it wouldn't be as odd to have people on here actually not caring about what others think of them as it would be on a forum composed of the general population.

I care WAAAAAY too much.

Same!

I thought I didn't (or shouldn't) care what people think of me, but on the two or three occasions people have made scathing remarks about me (probably well deserved) on this website, I've found that I care very much. Hopefully that's something I can use to positive effect, rather than being some kind of focus for resentment.

I find the older I get, the less I care. I do try to make a good impression, but you can't please everyone, so if they're hellbent on not liking me, then tough beans

I care enough that I feel bad if I can't please people; that's the anxiety talking. But at the same time, I don't go out of my way much or change my habits just to to make them happy. It's my life, not theirs.

Yes I care.

I think there is a difference between caring what others think and what others say. I don't really care what people think but of course that doesn't mean I will go out and walking around wearing a diaper or dressing up as a baby or wearing a Halloween costume when it's not Halloween. That doesn't mean I will go out and say anything I want and be so offensive and crude. Maybe I do care to an extent, we all do so or else the world would be a dark place if no one literally cared. To my ex boyfriend I didn't care because I didn't worry about what others may think of me if I read a book at a table or play my game or what I have on or worry if others may think I am a pedophile because I am in the toy section. Problem was he cared way too much it gave him anxiety and gave him distress. There is such thing as caring too much. But to my mom I did care what people think of me or I would be going outside naked. I think lot of people are in between. But my first boyfriend didn't care what others thought it also affected him too and alienated people from him and then he would complain about people "not accepting him" and he didn't care if he embarrassed me by saying a curse word at cabaret and someone at another table did gasp. He went "but you said you didn't care what others thought" and I told him "These are people that I know and they know me, they are not strangers. I am embarrassed you said a bad word." He didn't care and made it out to be my problem. Good thing we're still not together. Then he was upset when I broke up with him. Yes because he didn't care what others thought, this is what he suffered as a consequence. He didn't care what others thought too much. Either one is bad. caring too much what others think and caring too little what others think.

People may say they don't care what others think and you, but that doesn't mean they want to hear it. Of course they wouldn't care, they don't know your thoughts and they aren't going to fret about what you may be thinking so therefore they do not care what you think.

?You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.?

-Eleanor Roosevelt


That quote helped me, a little

I think I don't care much about people's opinion, except if they think something negative about my behavior or something I just said and express it in front of me. I usually feel stupid in these times.

It's not easy to know what people tkink. They rarely say what they really think for fear of being rude or having a different opinion.

Plus, it's my life, not theirs. I am not on Earth to please them. If I do or say something they disapprove of, it's their problem.

Public perception is lifeblood for an actor or a politician. To a lesser degree employment and dating options can be impacted by perceptions. To the extent we need other people, we can be concerned about what they think of us.

Without feedback our concerns can grow to fear such that we can imagine the worst about how we look to others.

If we consider the public life we lead a little like theater, we can find ourselves adopting a persona (character) to become more acceptable to a wider audience. This can create tension for an Aspie because what is finally accepted is not reality by a construct.

The theater metaphor can work if one considers the type of theater where most people "don't get it". If a person presents himself as he is, he may find that 99% of people will avoid him, but there are those with whom he can connect and being accepted by someone who knows the real you is much preferable to someone who likes the persona you created.

I think most of us are not interested in living a crafted persona. However that represents only one end of a spectrum. The other end is a sort of "take it or leave it" attitude that almost invites isolation.

Most of us come to examine ourselves honestly and find that there are times when we talk too much or talk about things other people are not interested in. We can make an effort to change some characteristics without changing who we are. If our concern about what others think helps us to identify personal characteristics that we can improve, it is not a bad thing. If our concern riddles us with fear or the desire to pretend to be something we are not, then it may be unhealthy.

I care whether people think I'm a nice person or not. I've been trying my best to think before I post for the past five years. I also try and support people the best I can,m talk to them and help them. I also like to make my own good impression as well. If I didn't care what people thought of me, I wouldn't have changed for the better before my 35th Birthday.