I feel "alone"

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I don't feel like I belong. My entire adult life I've spent feeling mentally astray from my peers. I've always felt I never had anything in common with most others and never shared the same interests.

Many of my other peers enjoy things such as anime, sports, long boarding, cars, celebrities, music, fighting, drama; etc - none of which I find interesting at all. To me it's useless information or hobbies. None of it intellectually challenges me or helps further my development so I'm easily bored with said topic. Time and time again, this is all they're interested in.

I want to talk about philosophy, psychology. What is the meaning of life? Is there a 4th dimension? What happens when we die? What is the soul? Why do we exist? How do psychopaths think; etc. - None of my peers have any thoughts or real interest in regards to what I find highly interesting subjects. Any attempt to bring said topic up, results in immediate disconnection as they simply have no idea what I'm talking about or don't understand.

I'm not interested in what the majority are interested in. To have an intellectually stimulating conversation is nearly impossible to find. Any attempt to expose individuals to 'open minded' topics has led to nothing as a result. I've felt alone as a result.

Has anyone else felt they simply don't belong or have to force themselves to try and be interested with topic matters regarding little to no thinking involved (i.e small talk)?

In my limited experience I have found that for the most part old people know everything. You could vollunteer to spend time at a nursing home. Also you could join something like Mensa. You may just have to seek out others looking for such deep conversations rather than trying to do so with those you already know. Maybe a book club that really gets into the themes of books?

You can start threads about your interests on WP if they don't already exist on the forums here.
I think you'll find a lot of people here who are very interested in those topics.

Are you studying at university? I am, and I've found that people there are more willing to, and even enthusiastic about, discussing intellectual topics, especially in honors classes (the regular classes I've been in, on the other hand, are largely composed of people who balk at the notion of asking questions or thinking critically). I've had some very enjoyable discussions with them-- about anything from whether consciousness plays a role in quantum mechanics to what constitutes art.

On the other hand, I wouldn't recommend that these things be your only topics of interest or the only subjects you're capable of discussing, because then otherwise intelligent who could contribute to a philosophical discussion might not want to talk to you. I don't know much about the other things you listed, but I'm almost certain you can find music or anime that will interest you (and, consequently, that you can discuss with people). You might be surprised at how analyzing a piece of music or an anime could challenge you intellectually.

Story of my life. I've had friends most of my life but I've always felt truly alone and lonely because my friends and I have never been "on the same page". They're interested in things I don't care about and all I want is to speak about deep and important things (science, psychology, books etc). That, the fact that I've always felt very different plus the fact that socialising is difficult for me has led me to feel like I'm an observer. It's like I'm standing on the other side of a window looking in at people even if I'm, in reality, right there with them. It's like there's a barrier between us.

Me too.

I have one friend left from school, we go for a meal once a month or less, it?s not really enough, but even then we don?t have much to talk about.

At work there?s always leaving dos for people that I?ll go to. I always end up on a table with either 5, 7, or 9 people and they always pair off with each other except me. Sometimes it?s so loud in these pubs and clubs I can?t hear any of their conversations at all (because they?re all facing each other not me) so I sit there in silence smiling pretending I?m happy when I don?t know what?s going on and I might as well not have gone.

They buy me drinks and stuff, its not like I'm unwelcome, but they evidently don't find me all that interesting to talk to. Hot topics of discussion are things like love lives which they all have and I don't.

I wouldn't even dream of trying to talk about something genuinely interesting. People don't care.

Perhaps you should find other aspies who you could meet in real life.

I have been to many different types of communities and always felt a fundamental disconnect to people around me. Maybe this is also the reason I never lasted very long in those places unless I absolutely had to like in work situations.

My understanding is that this stems from the differences between asperger and neurotypical functioning.

That's why you should find aspies to interact with. Build a tribe from them. Doesn't mean that you should't interact with NTs but having a social circle of aspies would give you a lot mental balance, because for once someone could actually empathize with your real problems. Once you get your need to be understood met by your fellow aspies, sosializing with NTs should become easier since you're no longer looking for them to provide you in this manner. You are more able to just sit back and enjoy the mindless chit-chat.

After all NT-relationships are mostly about feeling and emoting with each other with special emphasis in simply having fun and laughing together. It's about feeling and not thinking. In other words NTs are looking for you to provide them with good emotions and not stimulating intellectual conversation.