Write your 3 positives about being on the spectrum

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I have a very close feeling to animals and they understand my communication with them in a way.
I could pet wild Spanish cats who would noone ever touch them before and they were eating out of my hand.
Quite often in the summer butterflies come to sit on my arm and people told me that this happens very rarely, but I don't know if it happens very rarely.
I have no ability to gossip about people or people who were hurting me, my psychologist pointed it out, as she has hardly seen it before to this extend, and she said it's a beautiful quality, so I guess it's a positive thing, but I don't know if it's because of autism.
But I guess so,
I guess that autistic people have much lesser ability to gossip about people.

For me a lot of my quirks are caused by a sickness. My body is messed up, so it creates toxins. Those toxins often make me feel like high on drugs or can't think properly.

I've been like this since I was a child. They noticed that I was acting strangely. I didn't really fit into any box, so they labelled me with autism for funding reasons.

I mostly find it annoying when my message is ignored because of my quirks. I mostly want to get rid of my quirks so I can communicate without people being distracted by superficial things.

I believe a lot of my quirks are more superficial than my appearance. I'm just sick of people focusing on superficial things.

I absolutely agree: people SHOULD stop focusing on superficial things.

You, as a person of the world, have to show those people--who focus on superficial things--that you are worthy, and that their philosophical outlook is for the birds.

The way to do that is to assert yourself in conversation--show that you say what you mean and mean what you say.

I've found that being on the spectrum has:

I. Helped with the creative process, allowing me to create many different stories and songs as a result.

II. Allowed me to be extremely passionate about my interests whether it involves learning more about something or finishing one of my personal projects.

And III. Enabled me to develop empathy towards others.

So would I.

I'm sensing some bad parenting and favouritism going on here.

As far as the original topic is concerned, I can't even think of one positive, let alone three.

When I use hyperfocus, I can carry out tasks that others often don't have the mental endurance to finish.

I have more spacial perception than average, I think, and sometimes end up helping people solve problems that use spacial skills (like reading diagrams, tech manuals, maps etc, and being able to help someone else who is stumped while they are trying fix something that I have never worked on before).

I can normally be counted on to be honest and tell the truth.

This is off topic, but hunting and gathering is a better way of life. People started domesticating plants when their populations grew too large for the land to supply them with enough food. Autistic people probably hated the change.

Ok I think the source of our difference of opinion is that you view your autism as an illness whereas I do not view my son as being ill in any way. His autism is a descriptive term about his cognitive style, his personality and his way of being. In and in itself his autism is neither good nor bad its just different to the norm. That means it has both good and bad qualities (as any difference does). So liking some of the good qualities about my son that are due to his autism is no different than liking some of the good qualities about my younger son that are due to his nuetotypicality for example I love how engaging and interactive my younger son is, I love the way he "flirts" with people (especially women) and draws them in with his engaging, cheeky smile. There's good and bad in both cognitive styles and there is nothing wrong with liking the good in each.

I'm not exactly autistic. I have an illness that causes autistic-like behaviors. My body is imbalanced so I often feel like I'm high on drugs or or my IQ dropped 20 points. I'm recovering from this illness and a lot of my "autistic" behaviors disappeared. If people like me because of my autism label or autistic like behaviors they are superficial people who are not worth my time.

Your son is probably very different from me. I was never really "pure", I was a bully a lot of the time. I don't think my cognitive style can be described in one word or number. Same with my personality or my "way of being". It's great that you accept your son, but be very careful with labelling him. You wouldn't want him to end up like me.

So would I.
Please explain why. Is it because you view your autism as an illness and therefore find it patronising for someone to "like" something about an aspect of yourself you think is intrinsically "bad"?



This is a completely illogical thing to say. If you are "sensing" this from my initial post on this thread I would invite you to consider further the topic of the thread and whether that topic may well have biased the information you are basing your conclusion on? The topic was, after all, to list 3 positive things about autism. I could list 3 things I dislike about my sons autism if you prefer? Or I could list 3 things I prefer about my NT son? But that was not the topic at hand so I didn't.

Suffice to say there is no favouritism either way, I love both my sons equally. Part of being a good parent is finding the good things and strengths in each of your kids and then nurturing those positive things. Of course the corollary to that is that one needs to understand ones child's weakness and endeavour to help them overcome them. A good parent will see both the good, the bad, the strengths and the weaknesses in an objective way. The foolish parent will see only the good and thus neglect to prepare the child for the real world as their weaknesses will not be addressed. The bitter parent will see only the bad and that bitterness will generally be passed on to the child whilst the child strengths will fail to be developed. Both of these extremes are destructive to the child. Although the foolish parent is probably preferable. As with many things in life the true path is the middle ground. Focus on the good but be mindful of he bad. Nurture the strengths but also take steps to lessen the weaknesses. My sons are very different, even at their young ages it is clear to me that they will each have very different strengths and weaknesses. My job is to understand those things objectively and take the necessary steps to maximise their potential for a happy and fulfilling life. So sure there are things I prefer about one over the other and visa versa but as for favouritism? Absolutely not.

evilreligion, I have no reason whatsoever to doubt what you say and accept it at face value. And as you observed, the topic of this thread is 3 positive things. You were speaking about your own situation with your son, not for nor about anyone else. To me, hearing about your positives was very positive. I think your son is lucky to have you as his father. It is world's away from the one I had, though in his own way he did try his best to do the best that he could, and it was many many years ago.

Your understanding and acceptance of your son being on the spectrum will make a huge difference to his life; you sound like a very affirming parent and that is one of the best gifts a parent can give; the others IMO are attention, acceptance, approval and appreciation. That's how wonderful adults are made. Good for you.

Lately on WP there has been this somewhat cantankerous thing going on, it seems to me, and I would appreciate as OP if this thread stayed on course. Affirm yourselves. You all have strengths, yes, you do. You really really do...

Noticing details

1. I love working out how things work(obsession) which has helped in my job as a software support technician.
2. Being honest and not sugar coating things. lieing is hard for me so it's a quality people like and it's something I prefer to do.
3. Being calm in emotionally elevated situations like an emergency or arguments. Thinking more logically than emotionally is a positive I think.

1.) Rational thinking. Being able to take things in with an objective eye and process things as they ought to be, as opposed to how they are, is a very, VERY good thing to have.

2.) Awesome community. Well, I didn't realize this until I found several other Aspies to talk to. Same thing goes to fellow Introverts, fellow car enthusiasts, basically knowing I'm in between being unique and not being alone.

3.) Integrity and trustworthiness, and fostering said attributes in those I associate with.

Welcome to Wrong Planet mikecole. You have made a great start here :

Thanks B19