Aspergers discrimination -- son refused spot in acting class

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EarthCalling
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08 May 2007, 6:29 pm

beautifulspam wrote:

Quote:

Well, first of all, the "roll" he played with this situation was they were supposed to be acting out "hugging". They hugged a little too much, and the child that got "hurt" is very hyperactive. Not saying my son didn't have a role in his getting hurt, because he did -- basically they all fell, and my son's head hit this kid's head as they fell to the floor. Wasn't anything he DID on purpose to hurt the other little guy.

Oh no, you caught me in a spelling error. I am so embarrassed. Clearly my spelling error is a point in favor of your argument. This is known in formal logic as an argumentum ad orthographiam.

Anyway, NT or AS, your son DID hurt another child while participating in a program that he enjoys access to due to his disability.

Schools and related programs are very careful about keeping children safe and protecting themselves from legal liability. They don't want to hear about whose head bonked whose and who is hyperactive.

If this summer camp had admitted your son despite knowing about his AS, and he had hurt someone else, do you think they would have exposed themselves to a lawsuit?

It really does not sound like the "incident" was on purpose or really his fault. They where the ones who instructed a group of boys to "hug", meaning "body contact" the fact it ended badly I don't hink has much to do with any boy in particulars behavior. I am not sure if you have talked to the director yet, if not maybe you should write a point form list just like you said in the last post, all the things he is in without need for accomidation. Demand to know what other incidents, other then the head bonking that he was involved in. If we tossed every boy who was involved in an injury from our scouting / cub / beaver groups, we would have had no boys left! :lol:

beautifulspam
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08 May 2007, 6:42 pm

Quote:

It really does not sound like the "incident" was on purpose or really his fault.

I agree! It's not the boy's fault, and it's an unfortunate situation for all involved. We can blame litigious parents for this kind of thing. But I don't think it's a case of anti-autistic discrimination.

jman
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08 May 2007, 7:26 pm

I don't think it's really discrimination per se...

I work for a youth program and we have a summer camp going on. We've had a couple inquire about letting their special needs kids in the program, but unfortunately we had to turn them down simply because we don't have the staffing capacity to accomodate them, it's nott that we don't want them their, it's just we can't take them. But our organization is non profit and is barely getting by as it is, so we have a good reason to not accept them.

I would talk to the director and see if you can work something out rather than just going to the press or suing them.

BTW schleppenheimer what part of Pittsburgh are you from> I am from Monroeville.

schleppenheimer
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08 May 2007, 9:48 pm

I really want to thank ALL of you for responding. I just was feeling bad, and needed to hear from a sympathetic group.

I totally understand the school's point of view. I've worked at a school, and understand their liability issues. I wouldn't want uncontrollable kids in a program either. If my son hurt somebody, even just by acting too silly, then he wouldn't be appropriate for this summer camp. He had no intention of hurting anyone -- he's friends with the kid that got hurt -- and he felt horrible that it happened at all. That's partially why he was so emotional at the end of class.

The thing that I'm beating myself up over is the fact that I kind of questioned whether I should sign him up for this therapeutic class in the first place, kind of knowing that it might jeopardize his getting into the summer camp (which is NOT therapeutic). I just felt like maybe I shouldn't do it -- and it turns out, I was right.

I honestly think that this not allowing my son into the summer camp is purely because he is in the therapeutic class currently. I think the "incident" that he had yesterday didn't help things at all, and understandably so, but I really think the issue is that they don't want to have what they would consider "high-risk" kids in an NT summer camp. My son is a very laid back, non-combative type kid, who really loved the idea of acting. There is another school we can look into, and I'm NOT concerned about him being a behavioral problem -- he never has been, and wasn't a problem yesterday, except for his over-emotionalism in response to the situation. I'm sure that when I talk to the director tomorrow, I'll get the full story.

Jman, we are from the Cranberry/Marshall Township area. Nice to know there are others close by!

As far as I know, we are the only people from the therapeutic class applying to summer camp.

The question is, where would my kid go for good acting help, to socialize with other kids and learn NT behavior? This is what I've been recommended to do for him on this very site, and it appears that if you are up front about his being on the spectrum, then no acting program will want your child in their summer camp.

Kris

KimJ
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08 May 2007, 11:01 pm

Again, they have no grounds to deny him if you are not asking for special accomodations. Find out the whole story but still let them know they are wrong. Your son doesn't have special assistance at school? Being on the spectrum doesn't mean you can't participate in regular activities. That's segregation.

Cyanide
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08 May 2007, 11:41 pm

When I was in 5th grade (so around your son's age), I was in an after-school basketball class. I always paid attention and I never talked or interrupted anything (some other kids would on a regular basis). The bastard coach always made me sit out when everyone else got to play basketball. It pissed me off to the point where I just walked out one day. I'm a senior in High School now and I still hate coaches/gym teachers with a firing passion.

People like that are worthless scumbags. I'd advise going "Rambo" on anyone who punishes your son for stupid reasons, or does any other blatantly unfair act. Let them know that you won't tolerate what they're doing.

sigholdaccountlost
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09 May 2007, 4:16 am

[quote="beautifulspam] Schools take this sort of thing very seriously.[/quote]

:lol: :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

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Roxas_XIII
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09 May 2007, 5:44 pm

Cyanide wrote:

HERE HERE!

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agodamoungmen
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09 May 2007, 6:19 pm

schleppenheimer wrote:

I am so sad about this, I can hardly think.

I had read many, many times on this site about people having taken acting classes, and feeling like that was very helpful in their understanding of NT's.

So, our local area has an outreach program with the Civic Light Opera in our city where they will do therapeutic acting classes for kids on the spectrum. So, I immediately signed my son up, and he got in. Initially there were almost 12 boys in the class. After four weeks, we are down to six. Right away, two boys were extremely disappointed in the class -- either they thought it was too babyish, or they thought it was an ACTing class, meaning they thought it would teach them how to behave with others, not how to ACT. One kid came out of class and had a really rather severe meltdown, throwing furniture, etc.

On the opposite side of that, my son LOVED the acting class. Can't wait to go. I was planning on signing him up for acting summer camps through this group, and thought that the therapeutic acting class would be a good initiation for him -- it he liked this, he would be ready to do more, and would be used to the location, etc.

Well, yesterday's acting class was fine, until the end, and I guess my son and two other boys were acting silly, and they all fell down, and one boy got a little bit hurt (no blood, no bruises, was happy as he walked out of class). My son was very upset, because he had "gotten into trouble." My son is going through this stage where he cries whenever there is a perceived threat by an authority figure. He didn't get into full crying mode, but he was tearing up quite a bit. The teacher gave me a very cursory explanation of the incident, and that was it.

UNFORTUNATELY, I also handed my application for TWO summer camps that day.

I get a call today, and the academy will not take my son, with the explanation that they don't have the staff or experience to handle special needs students. I actually felt bad for the poor girl at the reception desk having to make this call. Must have been embarrassing for her. She also mentioned the "incident" that happened yesterday. What just kills me, is that I would have sent in an application even if my son hadn't done this therapeutic class, and he would have been accepted just fine.

My son goes to a regular school, attends a regular class without an aide, and only has a "special needs" communication arts class. He sings at church, he has sung in the school choir, and he plays not only in band, but in a much smaller school jazz band. He sings constantly at home, and I've been telling him for a month that we were going to sign him up for this summer camp.

I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me.

Kris

I know this only too well. I'm nearly 26, the possibility of myself having the illness, had been suggested when I began primrary school, signals were there, but had been overlooked, I was just treated as a day dreamer, the bigger picture had been ignored and, as a result my progress suffered and was put in a remeadial class, from the age of eight till I left school. As an attender of a main stream secondary school, it had then been made a bit more apparent, where my strengths and weaknesses lied so, I from the ages of 12 to 16, I studied different subjects at different levels- meaning I was a semi achiever and a semi under achiver. The day I turned 18 (22nd of sept 1999) I had my diagnosis and it was made official. For this I have a distinct distrust towards employers, the public education system and the general mainstream society. I feel I have been deprived of so much and although it's become less a struggle as the years have gone by and some circumstances have improved, though I'm still very distraught and do feel deprived of achieving my goals. Mainly a career and a partner. Music and english are my 2 passions in life, which I'm using to beef up my CV, but my anger is still with the education system in the UK, I always made that apparent and, if those factors were taken seriously I wouldn't be unemployed living on benefits thinking I'll be in the same situation when I'm an O.A.P. I'd have earned my degree by now and be earning the income I deserve.

GoatOnFire
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10 May 2007, 12:03 am

That's horrible. That's exactly why I am so secretive about my diagnosis.

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ZanneMarie
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10 May 2007, 3:23 am

I would contact the ACLU and state exactly what you did here. Let them fight with them. He's proven he can function in regular classes with no problem. They need to defend their position. If it's public and funded with public money, by law they must make reasonable accomodations.

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TrishC7
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10 May 2007, 5:11 am

I'd say something like the ACLU would be a last resort. This could be a simple misunderstanding. If it's made clear to the director the type of activity (hugging exercise), accidental contact, and how easily a repeat of this could be avoided (don't put the boy in a 'football' situation), it seems to me that it might well be resolved without a lot of trouble. I hope I'm not wrong.

jessentric
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10 May 2007, 5:14 am

I got into acting when I was 5, and at first I was so awkward, but eventually I turned to love it, I used my strangness, and I could use my love of Dramatic Arts and Literature (My main interest). It was a way for me to gain a bit more of an ability to be social, aswell. I learnt more about people, and how to 'act' in day to day life. It was so so useful, and I cannot imagine my life without that oppourtunity.

What I am tryiing to say, is you cannot let your son have that chance taken from him. This may be the thing which makes him so happy, it may not. But what happened to him was wrong. And I know how it feels, it's happened to me before. I've missed out on parts not because I lacked ability, but because I was difficult for them to handle. Its not right, but its part of what your son and I will have to endure all of our lives.

I only hope he can get another chance.

I feel your pain.

Good luck.

schleppenheimer
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10 May 2007, 10:07 pm

Just an update --

Although my check has been returned by mail, I did talk to the teacher of my son's current class. He admitted that the "incident" was something that could happen with any little boys, and that my son wasn't to blame. He also impressed me by how well he seemed to understand my son's situation. I explained to him that he doesn't have any aid in his regular ed class at school, and he said that maybe he could do the academy part (classes on singing, dancing, acting, and stage combat -- type stuff) and this teacher would try and make sure he is available for my son's classes. But I still have to convince a woman that's in charge of the program next Monday. I'm not holding my breath, but I am going to try and state his case. We were going to try and do both this academy of classes, AND another three week session where the kids do a mini-musical, but the teacher mentioned that there was a lot of down time, and that my son might have a rough time with that aspect of the musical session. He's right -- that probably would be the case.

So, I'm hoping for the academy classes, and the teacher suggested we could do that, and then try some of the fall classes, and see how that goes. Hopefully the woman that I need to talk to will be reasonable about this, because my son was really looking forward to this.

Thanks again for all of your support.

Kris

walk-in-the-rain
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10 May 2007, 10:32 pm

If your son requires no extra assistance in a regular classroom then how can they refuse to allow him into the class. I don't think you can just look at someone and say they have AS and refuse based on the label alone. If he has trouble in the class with behavior then they can ask that he not attend anymore if he is disruptive - but for them to just assume that he is going to be?

BugsMom
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10 May 2007, 11:38 pm

schleppenheimer wrote:

I really want to thank ALL of you for responding. I just was feeling bad, and needed to hear from a sympathetic group.

I totally understand the school's point of view. I've worked at a school, and understand their liability issues. I wouldn't want uncontrollable kids in a program either. If my son hurt somebody, even just by acting too silly, then he wouldn't be appropriate for this summer camp. He had no intention of hurting anyone -- he's friends with the kid that got hurt -- and he felt horrible that it happened at all. That's partially why he was so emotional at the end of class.

The thing that I'm beating myself up over is the fact that I kind of questioned whether I should sign him up for this therapeutic class in the first place, kind of knowing that it might jeopardize his getting into the summer camp (which is NOT therapeutic). I just felt like maybe I shouldn't do it -- and it turns out, I was right.

I honestly think that this not allowing my son into the summer camp is purely because he is in the therapeutic class currently. I think the "incident" that he had yesterday didn't help things at all, and understandably so, but I really think the issue is that they don't want to have what they would consider "high-risk" kids in an NT summer camp. My son is a very laid back, non-combative type kid, who really loved the idea of acting. There is another school we can look into, and I'm NOT concerned about him being a behavioral problem -- he never has been, and wasn't a problem yesterday, except for his over-emotionalism in response to the situation. I'm sure that when I talk to the director tomorrow, I'll get the full story.

Jman, we are from the Cranberry/Marshall Township area. Nice to know there are others close by!
As far as I know, we are the only people from the therapeutic class applying to summer camp.

The question is, where would my kid go for good acting help, to socialize with other kids and learn NT behavior? This is what I've been recommended to do for him on this very site, and it appears that if you are up front about his being on the spectrum, then no acting program will want your child in their summer camp.

Kris

Wow, what a small world this is....I live in Oakmont!

Kris, I really hope everything works out for your son, and that he is able to participate in the summer camp!

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