Had a meltdown yesterday

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My family and I went to this restaurant called "Texas Roadhouse" for dinner because they received a gift-card from my older step brother. I've been there several times before, and it was kind of loud, but this time was a record-breaker. It was so unbelievably loud, so loud that I had to lean in to hear the conversation I was having with my parents. The loud country music, the waitresses dancing, the waitresses screaming "YEE HAW!! !" to those who had birthdays, they all were blaring at once. Because of my Asperger's, this drained my energy. To make matters worse, when I went to the restroom to wash the pieces of ribs off my hands, after I finished washing them, I dried them under a PAINFULLY loud automatic hand-dryer. I was beginning to swear to myself in public because I was getting seriously annoyed and overwhelmed. The food was okay, but I wanted to leave right away because of the clamor. As we exited the restaurant, this hostess yells "HAVE A GOOD NIGHT!" at us. She held the door for us which was nice, but that didn't help my meltdown. If that wasn't enough, I had to go to the mall after that which was hell. Seeing all the people walk by, them talking, babies blubbering "Cookie, cookie!", music playing in the stores, it made me so overwhelmed. I then started to get discomfort whenever I'd hear my parents' voices because my head was so swimming in stimuli that any sound was unbearable. When we finally got home, I told my parents that I was going to be up in my room for a while with the door closed. So I did. But I noticed something on my bedroom floor: a notebook and magnetic drawing pad from my childhood that needed to be put away. So I tried jamming it under my nightstand, but it just slipped right out with a BAM!! I then completely snapped. I was swearing kind of loudly in a mini rage episode, shoving it under my nightstand, because I was desperate for some winding down time in my room with no sudden loud noises. Luckily, I did end up calming down because i was up in my room alone for a couple of hours. I don't think I want to eat at Texas Roadhouse anytime soon. If it wasn't for THAT experience, I wouldn't have gotten overwhelmed at the mall.

So, that´s a meltdown? Then I do get them now and then.

Quite often under similar circumstances, I end up walking as quickly as I can to the parking lot or car for some (relative) quiet and solitude. I rarely return to the noise, and my family (and friends) knows why I left and where I will be when they are ready to leave. It is a lot better than a meltdown, but it still blows my whole evening.

I've been to Texas Roadhouse before. I think it would help if you wear earplugs next time to reduce the noise.

Another fellow Massachusetts dweller!

It's not nearly as bad as those pubs in Watertown and West Roxbury where drunks lurk and yell at TVs playing sports games. Honestly, nothing will compare to the restaurant "China Pearl", located in downtown Chinatown during a massive event. After the ceremonies and food is brought out to the masses of people. the "karaoke" begins and the people who sing are often off-key and usually not very good at keeping the microphone away from their mouth and blasts everywhere.
All I can say is, it happens, and I'm sorry. My meltdowns involve screaming, stimming, uncontrollable crying, and I hide away or cuddle with my turtles.

That restaurant sounds like a complete nightmare, Rodey316. Total spectrum hell. Reading through your descriptions of the endless overstimulation of the environments you were in, I felt like I just wanted to get you out of there and never let you have to be in that place again.

I myself would not have been able to handle that experience without having a meltdown too. Personally I would have had to just get myself out of there even though it would have blown the evening. But as AspieUtah said, sometimes it's better to just do that, ie, remove yourself as soon as you realize this is all getting too much, rather than stay throughout the experience and pay the price later in completely losing it and having a meltdown.

Having said that, I don't always take my own advice in this matter! I can still tend toward trying not to "rock the boat" and simply keep trying to tolerate an overwhelming experience -- and then of course I pay the consequences. I'm trying to learn a hard lesson in knowing my limitations and knowing what "costs" me in the end. Sometimes it's good to push our boundaries and try to deal well with a situation that we know is pushing all our buttons. But other times it really is in one's best interest to note the limits are beyond what we can handle, and avoid the situation in order to avoid meltdowns and shutdowns and other stressful consequences.

I'm having a hard time being more careful about this kind of taking care of myself, but I'm realizing that an aborted meal is a small price to pay for my staying relatively calm and unstressed. If I were you I would be loving to myself and decide I just can't go to that place or places like it.

I always bring earplugs or headphones with me to restaurants or other notoriously loud places like move theatres. I've come very close to having sensory overload-based meltdowns before in environments that I couldn't escape, at least twice at work, which is not good.

Thank you, BirdInFlight. If you got me out of there, that'd be....interesting. Yeah, my evening that day was pretty rough.

Knowing I would feel the same discomfort in a place like that, I'd like to think I'd spot your discomfort and be all "Rodey's had a lovely time but..." ......and we're gone!

I nearly got arrested in Asda (a large UK supermarket store) because I had one of my typical aggressive / screaming / swearing / self injurious meltdowns. The bright lights, multiple people, noise, and too much visual information (as well as my synasthesia getting extreme) made me start screaming, hitting myself, and then apparently I was throwing milk cartons everywhere. I was told never to come back. That was three years ago. Now I get all my food shopping online.

I don't go to restaurants. At best I end up locking myself in the toilets and throwing up due to anxiety. At worst I start screaming, banging my head and pushing everyone to find an exit.

I'm sorry about that, SteelMaiden. That sounds horrible.

Thanks.