Our natural, acceptable difference

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Hi everyone, sorry for the unexpected thread. I've been thinking about this a lot and it has been really bothering me especially lately, when I begin hearing things like "But you are not like everyone else man", etc. We all have our differences and difficulties, yet, many people refuse to accept us as legitimate, acceptable human beings due to our natural difference.

Well, you see, when somebody has this syndrome we call Asperger's, this normally isnt noticed about somebody except by his/her very close friends and family. When it is noticed, people around you often start to react and treat you differently than they treat others. Thats when you start feeling as if you dont belong anywhere, or whatever. Now, this feeling of isolation and "not belonging" never really bothered me that much. What bothers me much more now, is that when you want to be treated as normal, and you are just unable to. People refuse to because they know you have a difference that is so clear about your behavior or way of speech that they refuse to accept that as normal, or as an "okay" thing that merits normal treatment of people around you. Thats the thing, nobody that is aware of the asperger's I have ever treats me as normal. While I do get treated as normal by people who dont know me(or dont know me well enough to realize I have that syndrome), thats when I get to be treated as normal by them, as another average human being. But Ive always wanted to be treated as that even by friends and family around me. What I hate is, that some people refuse to understand that, and instead of thinking "Oh well, he has a difference/difficulty, just like me and everyone does. Its okay, I'll still treat him as normal", they think, "Oh, well, this guy is quite different, so I'm going to make my treatment/attitude different towards him, too". Thats when I feel sadness deep inside. And it doesnt matter how much you'll try to explain that you are indeed normal, just with a small difference, you'll never be treated as such by these people. And Ive always wondered why is it like that, because I thought most people would understand that and treat me as normal for the sake of making me feel normal. How do they expect me to feel as such by treating me as if I'm not normal? Thats the mindset that I dont understand, you know. I was hoping if some people here can share your thoughts on this, and especially on, why is it people refuse to accept a normal person with a minor difference as normal. I'll admit, my asperger's is relatively weak and barely seen compared to other people with the syndrome, yet, people still notice it easily for some reason. So whenever I tried to hide it by pretending to have a normal attitude, it never was the case after all. Its not that I really care that much about what others think about me in their minds, but, when you see they're starting to treat you as if you are somebody that demands a special treatment, thats when my heartache begins. I really dont think I need any special treatment from anybody, and I can have normal conversation with a person, without him having to talk different or treat me different. Yet, people dont realize that. I was hoping if I can hear your thoughts on this matter, and what has helped you deal with the "special treatment" people are giving you just because you have asperger's.

I don't get it, either.

Everyone has quirks, NT or AS or anything else. We are all just people. How one individual gets the idea that he or she is somehow innately "better" or "more normal" than someone else, I have no idea. Its arrogant to me.

I don't know if wanting to be treated "normally" is the right goal...treated like we're equals. That's what I think we're really looking for. To be treated like we're valid human beings. Everyone deserves this - I don't care who you are, what your circumstances are, or how old you are.

More specifically, how do people around you treat you?
Do they treat you as less capable?
Give you special treatment that is not needed?
What specifically do you mean by treating you not normal in a way you don't like?

I think that people around me treat me more or less normal.
I'm not sure how to tell if they do or don't though.

Well, you see, when people realize I have the Aspergers and they speak to me, they try and speak in a more "understanding" way as if if they were to speak normally to me, they think I wouldnt understand what they're saying. So yes, to me it seems as if they think I wouldnt be capable of understanding them if they were to speak to me normally, so they feel a need to change their attitude in that case. And they really dont need to at all. I think the problem today is, a lot of people tend to jump to the absurd conclusion that anybody who has a syndrome or any general mental difficulty/disability, then that automatically translates to them being incapable of understanding things like normal human beings, or something like that. Not everyone does that, and I have met quite a few good people who treated me normal even with my difference, but there are some that didnt, and I didnt really like that. Its less that I dont "like" it, but more that I dont think it is needed and is just unnecessary and causes misunderstandings. If its somebody I see frequently, then I wouldnt want the person to think I am in need of special treatment by them or make them feel like they're forced to change their everyday attitude when they talk to me just because of my aspergers. And well, some of these people refuse to believe that and still feel the need to speak differently with me, no matter how much I'd try to explain that there is no need to.