Self Doubt Before Diagnosis

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Ok I'm convinced again lol. I feel I'm too easily swayed by other people's opinions and doubting of me.

The main reason I think I have it is because I just don't get social stuff. I just don't. I never have. Yes I can make small talk but I have scripts and don't actually care. There have been situations throughout my life where I felt I was missing something - that something wasn't 'right' about me. My interests are in people and stories so maybe this has made it hard to be noticed for my difficulties. But they're there. I never played with toys like other children and noticed this - I knew I was different I just couldn't understand how. I want the diagnosis because it's the only thing that seems to explain these difficulties. But it's hard if not even I understand what's different - ahhh it's so frustrating!

In the context of you having experienced many years of denial by others long before your diagnosis happened, it doesn't surprise me that it took you time to recalibrate your self-perception, Rocket123. It immensely saddens me that people only reach the state of doubt which is described by various people in this thread because they have been marginalised in dismissive ways so often and for so long in the past. IMO, they didn't create their own state of doubt - others did, and then that was internalised, and became an additional burden to the pre-existing ones.

That is very sad. I am sorry to hear of the pain people have suffered, are suffering, and which others will no doubt suffer, before the climate of acceptance of neurodifference is culturally and professionally established.

Yes, I do this too. I was actually recently assessed by an ASD specialist who primarily works with little kids. She diagnosed me with SAD, so for a short time I was leaning towards the "not ASD." However, after really looking over my life and doing more research into girls with ASD, if anything, now I feel more confident in the possibility of having it. At the very least I feel like I can give more specific examples (and my mom can too - I showed her some of Tony Attwood's work on girls with ASD and she was amazed how much of it described me).

So now I'm just contacting places seeing who can assess me. However, this time I'm specifically looking for someone who works with adults often and who also knows how ASD can present in females. I definitely still have doubts, though - mainly about whether I showed enough symptoms of social and communication issues in childhood.

I suddenly wonder if it would be worthwhile for you to contact the Autistic Women's Network (you can easily find them online) and ask them if any of their members know of someone suitable in your area. They have some good stuff online about female diagnosis too, as I recall, and their specific mission is to offer female-supportive information.. and/or maybe you could also become a member..

I feel the exact same Jezebel - everything matches me to do with the childhood experiences of girls on the spectrum. I've also wondered if I might have ADHD/ADD as well because I struggle to concentrate and am a bit hyperactive sometimes and say impulsive stuff in social situations. But when I bring this to the psych (or anyone) it's always something else - I wonder if they just assume that I'm making it up or that I'm basing my difficulties on one single event or a range of different events (which they are!) I relate a lot to WillowHope's experiences too.

I will certainly look into B19's suggestion. I'm in Australia so home to Tony Attwood and still there seems to be a lot of ignorance around females on the spectrum!

This piece from the AWN website may especially resonate with you just now, Jezebel:

http://autismwomensnetwork.org/autistic ... -it-right/

AWN got so many responses to a recent post on diagnostic issues for women that this follow-up article has now been posted on the AWN website and it speaks to several of these current threads where we have been discussing both personal and general issues affecting the diagnostic process for women.

https://soniaboue.wordpress.com/2015/10 ... diagnosis/

These are really helpful links.

My daughter's therapist has sent a recommendation to the school Child Study Team to have her assessed because of the many spectrum traits that she has observed. For some reason the school had not noticed, though they picked up on similar traits in my son very quickly. AWN is a great resource.

As a 38 year old male, I'm curious the reasons for a diagnosis at this point. I am undiagnosed, but have no doubt. Everything from my life points to autism very simply. Is there a reason for a diagnosis that I'm missing? I don't require services and am very comfortable with myself at this point. I started to become aware of my tendencies around 5 years ago and have followed up on them since. I really have no doubt that I'm autistic, so curious what benefits, if any, a diagnosis would actually bring.

No, I can't see any benefit for you either.

I think a core issue is whether you are a person with skills gained from experience (whether formal/informal or both) which enable you to use those skills to discriminate, analyse, apply information and make confident decisions, then this is just one more area in which those skills can be applied to information, and given the wealth of professional information on the net, in libraries and so on, (such as Tony Attwood's), the information cache is readily available.

However I suspect that most people don't develop that sort of 'embedded' confidence and skill level until their mid-30s (often much later) and often younger people find an external/formal diagnosis more helpful to themselves. So there are 'different strokes for different folks', and it's a not black/white issue.. if you don't have those skills and that confidence level at any age, then the validation of an external assessor may be needed to confer peace of mind. (Unfortunately the clinical issues which affect diagnosis/misdiagnosis ratios may only increase their confusion).

I wonder if, given the painful confusion that can and does affect people re this, allied to understandable anxiety arising from both intrinsic and extrinsic factors (for obvious reasons, there are some real, structural and clinical barriers built into the diagnostic process and it's an imperfect process at best) whether it would be worth seeing and working out preparation with someone who can upskill you to define, select, refine and practice the way you present your information.

Different groups have these kind of skills to varying degrees depending on their personal ability - facilitators, people who offer conflict resolution training and skills, some counsellors, some patient advocates, some retired clinicians and psychologists, some bloggers who dialogue with people on their sites. There are also some presentations about clinical communication which have been made in NZ conferences which I could try to find and post later on today (busy for next 5 hours). Or a support group of people dawn from the ASD community to work together to formulate a clear framework of self-advocacy. One way or another I think there must be more we can do to help people prepare for this harrowing experience of being judged once again in life - and many people on the spectrum have had such a lifetime of being judged by strangers that they have been traumatised by it.