Will a diagnosis benefit me?

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Hi Wrong Planet,

In general, I don't think an ASD diagnosis would benefit me. If I was diagnosed when I was younger, maybe it would have (I'm 30), but not now.

I don't have any current problems at all with mental health or anxiety or anything like that.

I still do have some problems in social situations, but it doesn't really bother me very much. I might notice at the time that I'm struggling in some way but I don't dwell on it.

I do still have issues regarding getting obsessed about things. For me it's usually people I obsess over. I keep a close check on this now and if I think I'm getting too drawn to a person I take a step back. So that isn't currently a major issue hasn't been for a few years. I feel like I can keep it under control. I'm not 100% sure if this is a 'usual' way 'special interests' manifest but I've read on other forums that it can be.

I've had the occasional issue at work recently but nothing compared to the constant problems I had when I was younger. I was always in trouble for being abrupt to colleagues and never understood what I was doing wrong. I've recently started a second job at a new company and I've been pulled up twice for how I've spoken to someone and once for responding differently than expected. I'm hoping this is just a teething problem and will just go away and won't be an on going issue. It's bothering me a little bit but I'm happy to just see how things go and not get too stressed about it.

I'm thinking about this now because my ex partner (who is totally and fully convinced I do have ADS and notices all my quirky behaviour way more than anyone else, including me) messaged me earlier to ask if I would ever consider a diagnosis. But I honestly don't see any benefit in it. I'm much happier just believing I'm normal. Although I acknowledge lots of stuff I do and have done I'm the past is similar to someone with ASD I just consider myself to be a normal person. I think being diagnosed would actually make me feel worse and question myself more. I'm quite happily balanced at the moment and I got here all on my own and I don't feel like I need any help.

So there's little point in perusing it really is there? Unless I'm missing something... Which I why I'm asking...

Unless it would benefit you:

Employment-wise (accommodations)

Education-wise (accommodations again)

Or a diagnosis would give you peace of mind,

I don't see the use of pursuing a diagnosis.

Obviously, you could always educate yourself even more on autism/Asperger's.

Well that's what I thought about it. I don't know why she keeps asking me stuff like this.

Maybe it's because it would benefit her if I had a diagnosis. Then when I act odd she can give other people a reason. "I'm sorry about that, she doesn't know she's doing something wrong, it's becausshe has Aspergers Syndrome." "When you meet Idemash bare in mind she acts differently, it's because she has Aspergers Syndrome."...

"How much of who you are is because of one single reason" is something I like to ask people as a far of conversation if the person is friendly enough; just something interesting to start connecting peoples' self with, well, themselves. IE, the fact that someone is heterosexual gives a lot of connections everywhere, to possibly explaining political affiliation or other personal beliefs.

Think of it like that. Is "who you are" based someone in the medical field sent "yep, you fall in this huge band of idiosyncrasies that are usually associated with people that are on the Autistic Spectrum"? How much? I lost a fair amount of sleep trying to separate different oddities I had into "Joe" and "Asperger's Joe."

Terrified of people? Probably Asperger's Joe.
Political affiliations? Probably Joe.
Well, what about spending 4 hours a night researching the development and history of nuclear weaponry for months and months during my high school years? Being utterly fascinated with what went into making such horrific things to the point that I wouldn't sleep at night? Asperger's fascination or Joe?

In the end, it didn't matter; I was losing sleep to a history of nuclear weapons and whether it was because I was 'weird' or if it was because I was diagnostically 'weird' changed nothing.

This notion of "pretending to be normal" is the main concern I would have. Normality is so up in the air and constantly changing that it isn't worth a bucket of warm spit to worry about. Hell, think back to when you were a kid. Nerdy and liking videogames was a social stigma but now the geeks rule the world. Jeez, "lawl I am totes socially awkward look at my geek chic glasses!" has been considered fashionable for some time.

I would think knowing is better than not knowing providing you don't start falling into the loop of "not normal not normal be normal" that will cause you so much strife. Of course, aren't you already there? You are on a site for people on the spectrum asking if you should get confirmation? In your mind, you are already there

But, from a personal experience, I think it has helped me. Whenever I am doing something that I go "oh, 'normal' people don't do that" I can attempt to reign in some of those differences. Put another way: in high school, I was the guy that even my friends thought something was really, really off with. Now as someone just a few years your junior, new friends are mostly of "Joe is a weird guy but no more than everyone else." It also can help if you ever need medication. I would never take something every day because I don't want to be loopy or numb on a contact basis but I do have a rescue drug for when stuff goes all flippy. I could not have gotten it without a diagnosis because most of the time I am just 'weird' but every couple of weeks when I am pacing back and forth and shaking because "the people across the street exist", Mr. Ativan is there.

Again, if you already 'know', is there any harm in actually having someone that knows what they are talking about confirming it? Just remember that no matter what, you are who you are because you are you.

The only thing I can see at this point if you get a diagnosis now if things deteriorate later on you do not need to first start the process. From what I see as of now you do not need one or you do need one but are not close to bieng emotionally ready for it.