Why High Functioning Autism is So Challenging

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This is completely my mother's view on the subject. She is not understanding at all, and simply tells me 'don't be weird' or 'try harder' without helping me or telling me how to act more normally. If I try to tell her that I do not understand non-verbal features/elements of communication/social scenarios she tells me that I am purposefully 'acting stupid', and to stop. If I attempt to communicate to her the sincerity of my confusion, she refuses to listen.

High functioning autism means I have to continue to function in this world risking burnouts and having to slog through my mind which is a gigantic swarming mess of intrusive thoughts and brain fog, like a pounding mental assault every single second.

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This guy's experiment to see what it is like to be NT shows that the first thing he felt was absolute clearness and bliss in the mind. Something NTs are gifted with having, being able to walk everyday without a anxiety and pain inducing state of mind of constant mind assaults. Imagine having chronic leg and skeletal pain, but in the brain, well the NTs live in absolute bliss compared to us. I bet our negative emotions would be considered absolute torture to them except we are just used to the pain.

That link appears to be broken, here it is again:
https://www.verywell.com/why-high-functioning-autism-is-so-challenging-259951

Thank you Adamantus

I'm not clicking that link again.

That is not only a feature of Asperger. Sensitivity occurs also, in a slightly different manner, in people with atypical depressions (most commonly seen in manic-depressive illness).

A symptom of atypical depression is

Having a more intense reaction or increased sensitivity to rejection

Source: http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/atypical-depression

I wonder how people with co-morbid Asperger and atypical depressions feel like.

Wow that article is me. I can completely relate to it. I sent it to my family who still does not get it. Thanks for sharing.

This describes life for my son. When he doesn't behave in the expected way, he's always been met with, "What's wrong with you?" Of course he believes there must be something wrong[i] with him if people keep asking. So far we've been unable to find a doctor or therapist who is able to help him. At 23, he's aged out of all the community-based help available. I don't know what to do to help him.

I've gotten to where I can't hear What's wrong? without it meaning What is wrong with you,why can't you be normal?

Even when I know it's that I look sad or upset and people are using what's wrong to mean why are you sad, I hear what is your problem you impossible freak!?

I was thinking about sensory integration issues yesterday. I think they are for many of us part of autism, but maybe a part that all autistics don't have. And that some have more than others. Also that there are people with sensory integration issues who are not autistic, it's either a sensory disorder all by itself or a part of some other disorder besides autism.

Then I thought about how Asperger's used to be a separate diagnosis, but now it's been lumped in under the general autism umbrella. I wonder if the next step for the DSM will be to lump all sensory integration type disorders in under autism, too.

But all this started off with the Quadrant Grid I got, all by itself, to attach to a patient chart. It should be accompanied by the rest of the questionnaire and the assessment and interpretation, I think. I was able to acquire a couple other pages, but it still seems incomplete without the questionnaire itself. I also wondered if there is an ITSP for adults. It's all "my child" this and "my child" that. Once again there's the underlying implication that autism is a childhood disorder. That somehow we all grow out of it or disappear when we're 18. Somewhere I read "no you don't magically no longer have autism on your 18th birthday" this week. I wish I remembered exactly where.

This is an interesting thread, even without reading the article. My browser (Firefox) shows a warning, so I didn't go there.

I react inappropriately sometimes. If I don't know the person I may flip them off because I don't understand why they are waving at me. I don't know them.

Example: A man was walking in the pedestrian crosswalk at Target and was waving frantically at me as he was walking in front of my car. I just wanted him to walk quickly so that I could drive my car through the pedestrian crosswalk. So! I flipped him off so he would get out of my way.

Then again , who knows I may have known him, but facial recognition is difficult for me. I also get confused when it comes to gestures as well. I seem to think when someone smiles they are angry. It is probably due to NT's confusing double messaging. Like when saying their fine when they are not.

Haven't seen you post in a while here Deb, and your avatar is different-- welcome back.

I have been trying to adjust to losing my job of 15 years.

s**t, I don't know what to say except sorry to hear that. The forum's here if you want to vent though.

The hardest part for me, is that BECAUSE I'm so articulate, insightful/analytical, and to the naked eye-APPEAR normal, others measure me by the "NT stick" instead of the "aspie stick." I am seen as a normal person with some definite awkwardness and social deficits, instead of being seen as an Aspie who has worked extremely hard on said challenges and can pass for almost non-aspie.

My skill with language and analysis doesn't mean I'm a good self advocate. My skill in navigating conversations with self involved people/narcissists doesn't mean I know how to open the door to a reciprocal friendship. People basically think I'm smart enough to know better when I make social mistakes, so they assume my behavior is deliberate and then usually get annoyed or angry. This occasionally turns into what I call aspie hate.
Most of the time though it just makes it difficult to form friendships and find people who understand me.

Here are a few examples to clarify: can't remember customers faces very well because of mild face blindness and the assumption is I don't care enough to remember them. 2. Used to have a tendency to trust anyone while making new friends because I didn't have the ability to imagine and watch out for situations I'd never heard of. (One friend distracts you, while the other goes in the living room and takes your debit card from your purse.) Or a group of foreign language speaking acquaintances plan right in front of you in their language a scam to distract you and search your room for any valuables. I had to learn from these negative situations. I couldn't have foreseen them without being told because I couldn't make up scenarios that I never heard of (at that time) I was naive and gullible. I also was somewhat sheltered from truly evil people until I was an adult attempting to forge my own way.

I've learned so much now. I can definitely imagine scam scenarios that haven't happened to me because so many of them have. I don't trust first ask later anymore. It's the opposite. It's a little sad actually how little faith I have in people now. I have a list of red flags I look for and my social skills have come a long way since I was a little girl and didn't know personal space. I've learned honesty and baring your weaknesses are two different things. That yelling at someone will never get the result you want. I've learned how to "fake it til you make it." But working on my challenges is a constant learning experience. I'm lucky enough to have some socially smart teachers.

Totally relate.
I think I come across as pretty competent in Psych / medical situations, partly because they relate to my special interests. I'm sure this has lead to not receiving the level of support & care I would otherwise have received.

It's partly my social persona too. Sometimes I try to drop it, particularly in a psych / medical situation, but I find it almost impossible. I think it's a defence mechanism.

Zel.

Yes, I totally agree FC

Zel.