Why Are Aspies Suspicious Everyone Is Lying About Autism?

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I suspect that people lie about having autism so that they can join this forum because I'm on it and I'm severely cool.

I guess I'm really glad that I'm not on FB, or wherever else people are having problems. But as someone new here can I ask why anyone who wouldn't be diagnosable who claims they are ANYWHERE is a problem? I like myself but I'd be very happy not to have the symptoms I have (not that I'd be willing to give up other parts of me). So I'm baffled that people would misrepresent themselves, intentionally, to others about ASD. Moreover I'm baffled why it matters. What are they doing that is harmful to those who are legitimately on the spectrum? I'm new so apologies if I'm missing something big here.

I think you've nailed it!

I followed a link to Tumblr once. I figured it was just another Internet time sink, like Twitter. I can't remember to brush my hair in the morning, so why should I spend my energy on what some idiot is saying on the Internet? WP has a purpose, it has helped me immensely with a lot of things I was struggling with.

As for facebook, I see it mainly as a way to keep in contact with friends and family, particularly those overseas. I do not use facebook for reading about autism mainly because it hadn't occurred to me. That said, when I think about it, I really don't want autism related content showing up in my friends' feeds. It could have bad consequences for me and my family if some people found out that I suspect I have autism.



Yup. You summed it up really well. I couldn't figure out why this was getting to me, but it's really that bit. I thought "Why am I getting upset about a bunch of teenagers being cliquey, this is what teenagers do to each other, I'll just go hang with the old folks." When people don't believe you are in pain because you don't have the body language they expect from someone in pain. When your psychologist laughs at you because you tell him the bright sunlight is making you anxious. This is my life, and the life of many others here. We are so mindfucked by the world doubting our experiences, and so bad at identifying our feelings. It's really adding insult to injury.

People who read that Tumblr and facebook stuff: when you comment on stuff like that on WP, please define what you are talking about, much like an OP is expected to define special terms in their text.

Whenever I see those "We are the Real Autistics and the others are Fake" threads, I just picture a bunch of trolls sitting around and laughing like hyenas at the Autistics attacking each other. It's a bloody Roman Circus.

And -

I'm not saying I'm in the habit of hiding it, either. No I certainly don't go around screaming about it to everyone I meet, but if I am going to have dealings with someone on more than a casual basis, somewhere where my autism is going to affect me whether I admit to it or not, then I will disclose in the spirit of self-advocacy. I'm old enough to have experience with what can happen to you when you ignore this, deny it, and try to be "normal."
I'm autistic. I'm neither ashamed nor proud of that. But if it is relevant, I don't see the point in hiding it. If people are going to freak out about it I'd also prefer to know sooner rather than later, after I have anything invested. If they're going to freak out, I can't have them in my life anyway.

Same - you take some quizzes online for fun that tell you you're a sociopath or have ten different personality disorders or something, but it's just for fun because you know you're not. I doubt anyone really believes anything of themselves based on one quiz, and wouldn't look further into it unless they were having problems.

This is likely why I've never seen any evidence of it. I'm not on Facebook, tumblr, twitter or any of those things so I never see this behaviour. It still seems a bizarre way to get special treatment to me. I've seen people who behaved similarly with cutting themselves and they got special treatment. But autism? Bizarre choice.

That would definitely qualify as a reason Ezra!

I suppose that's a fair question that requires some clarification on my part.

For starters, I am extremely open about most aspects of my life on social media. Probably too open. I'm far from being the "strong, silent" type. I'm not too proud to admit when I'm wrong. I apologize for tripping over inanimate objects. A less charitable person might even describe me as utterly lacking in discretion. So when I learned that I was on the spectrum, I took a little while to process it (as anyone would), but when I had worked through the implications in my own head, I went public with the news. Everyone knows: family, friends, total strangers, coworkers, my boss, etc. I don't necessarily recommend that degree of openness for others to emulate - it's just how I do life.

I don't even pretend to fully understand all my own reasons for being public about it. Aside from it being in my nature to tell everyone everything about myself (yes, the very definition of boring), I guess part of the motive for sharing my story is to raise awareness among people that autism is not just a childhood affliction, despite the false impressions that much of the media creates. Another motive was to help people who do know me understand what makes me tick, and enable them to be a little more tolerant/ forgiving of my apparent quirks. I don't really expect any special accommodations for, say, my sensory issues because I've found ways to cope over the years that usually work pretty well.

When I spoke of not being a "special snowflake," I'm not denying that in some sense I am "special" - in a similar way that most people posting on WP are special. Clearly we stand apart from the general population in multiple respects. To my thinking (and I could be wrong here), the term "special snowflake" implies that not only is one somehow distinct from the general population, but because one is different, one has a sense of entitlement and therefore demands special treatment from others.

I can't recall if it was in this thread or another where I recalled my ill-fated Twitter account where I was following a lot of activist types. One thing is noticed was a lot of ASD activists going on about "identity first" (I think that's the term), ableist this and that, and just generally being special snowflake whiney butts who seemed to think that society owed them deference in terms of using the exact language they demanded of themselves. Personally, that's the kind of person that I take to be a special snowflake. "I'm special, and you must use the right terms and language to address me or I'll fly into a rage and call you all kinds of nasty names!" I don't really care how people describe my neurological condition as long as they're not trying to be insulting (exceptions made for NT friends with whom I can trade personal insults).

Part of the problem with being diagnosed late is that I simply didn't grow up using the kind of terms that have been coined among people with ASD or other disabilities. That in itself seems to arouse suspicions among people who have grown up hearing these terms batted around on an everyday basis. For example, I just learned about spoon theory a couple of months ago after someone commented that they didn't have enough spoons to deal with something.

Sorry for the lengthy reply, but hopefully that clarifies what I meant by the term. There's nothing wrong with being "special" in some way, as long as you don't have a sense of entitlement that the world revolves around you.

And, if he did any telethons, it would be "Jerry's Autistic Kids." Because only kids have it, y'know.

Your guess is as good as mine. Honestly, there could be numerous reasons.

If they're arguing with someone, questioning their diagnosis is a good way to make them question their 'right' to be here while also damaging their reputation. It basically translates to: "You're not one of us. Stop trying to act like you are."

It might be because the person is a control freak and desires to act as the lightning rod defining what is and what is not Autistic..for whatever reason. They might want to feel unique and special, which is threatened if the thing making them unique and special becomes more common.

Maybe their understanding of Asperger's simply differs from other people.

Is it because they view the disorder as a burden and don't wish for the same on others.

I'll stop there because I'm about to lose interest in this.

There's no way anyone can "prove" that they have Asperger's/autism, save somebody actually downloading their diagnostic review to WrongPlanet, and allowing everyone here to peruse it.

There used to be a person here by the screen name KingdomofRats. She stated that she was severely autistic. Some people didn't believe her because she was so clear and concise in her writing. She took umbrage to that, and left WP.

I'm not absolutely sure of this: but I believe she, eventually, went to a forum which required either tangible proof of a certified diagnosis of SEVERE autism, or proof that one is a caregiver, to be downloaded onto that forum.

I take people at their word. I don't believe it really benefits anyone to say they are autistic when they are not.

Unless they want, very badly, to hang out with Cool Ezra.

Maybe it's a bit like some hardcore Linux users, who enjoy the fact that are part of an elite subculture that knows Bash and vi inside and out, and can compile their own software with one eye closed. A newbie comes along using Linux Mint, and asks a simple question about how to get their scanner working, and gets scorned for being a geek wannabe because they don't know how to access man pages. ("Why haven't you already checked the output of 'scanimage --device pixma:04A91749_247936 --format=tiff > test.tiff?!' Sheesh.")

Their very presence on a web forum threatens to undermine the exclusivity of the club, so the uber geeks keep the "lusers" at arm's length to protect their own turf.

Just because you dont believe that something doesnt occur doesnt mean that it is so. There may be such people on WP, however most people on WP dont believe anyone would lie about themselves. However outside of the US, there are countries who pay up to two grand a month to someone diagnosed with aspergers if their symptoms prove difficulty in finding and keeping a job. There are people who can act well enough to pass as autistic for their eval. In other places people self dx to either gain sympathy or an oppressed status. Tumblr and FB are where the wannabes occur the most while WP it is hard to tell or occurs rather seldom.

I waste enough time loitering here on WP. Lol!

So I dont spend much time on Facebook (dont even know what a "Facebook group" is). And dont have a twitter, nor tumblr account.

So I dunno. You might be right about those platforms.

All I can do is go by my own experience.

In one particular platform, called "real life" ( ya know,that nonvirtual world away from your computer) I rarely encounter even real autistics who admit to being that (unless I attend the local support group meetings). Have NEVER meet someone claiming to be aspie/autie IRL who was obviously not that. Never met a "faker" IRL.

Wrongplanet has folks who are "self diagnosed". But WP doesnt seem to me to be plagued by "fakers" causing problems.

But how does being active on an internet platform translate into a dx? Call me naive, but I didn't think psychologists/psychiatrist were wont to base their diagnosis on someone's blog or WP activity?

Also, wouldn't a person who acted their way into a dx try to sit still in the boat? The more activity, the more likely to get caught.

As for sympathy and oppressed status.......yes, but I doubt there are a lot of them. It's like that peculiar lady who started pretending she was black while working for a black people's organization. Certainly some personal tragedy involved in that story, which is why I felt horrified at the abuse that was doled out to her. As a lot of people have mentioned, someone pretending to be autistic can't be in their right mind. So I figured in the event that someone is not really autistic, they are either mentally ill or making an honest mistake, and I certainly wouldn't want to throw rocks at either group. In either case, they will find out the truth eventually.

Hell, I might not be autistic. I just took a bunch of tests, spent a year researching (as in reading obsessively) before signing up for WP. I still can't see myself from outside. But the diagnosis feels like a really well-fitting sock. I tried going to some ADHD platforms because I think I have some of that too, but it seems less relevant, and some things I have a hard time relating to.

(Of course I just said that to cover up the real reason: Ezra)

To answer the original question: I admit I do get suspicious of people who don't give off the impression of being "damaged by life". You can generally tell people who have had a difficult life, just by the way they are. People who are perhaps a little too well adjusted and confident, I am somewhat suspicious of... after all autism does cause people significant problems.

I also get suspicious of people who don't seem to be highly alert/disturbed by their surroundings, yet claim sensory sensitivity. There is definitely something off there. You can generally tell sensorily sensitive people by the way they react to things around them.

I don't think people generally lie about autism consciously, in order for cynical personal gain. But I do think a lot of people self diagnose mistakenly, because they just don't realise that others experience things much worse than they do.

Disclaimer: Ironically Im not actually officially diagnosed with autism, so feel free to take what I say with a pinch of salt.

I don't get where this idea comes from that if someone is at the stage of 'self diagnoses' they must be searching for sympathy or trying to gain oppressed status(whatever that is). Before I got an official diagnoses I was 'self diagnosed' my sister mentioned aspergers so I looked into it, and even the therapist I was seeing thought it was the case but therapists can't really diagnose. I thought it was most likely as it seemed to explain some of the difficulties and experiences in my life a lot better than anything else.

Before I concluded I had aspergers, I thought I was just a stupid idiot who failed at everything and that I was completely worthless and didn't give a damn about my own well-being for the most part.

Last edited by Sweetleaf on 09 Aug 2016, 1:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I've had a difficult life; it doesn't show on me.

I'm actually pretty fortunate in lots of ways.