Burnout...

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After nearly three decades of making myself live up to my family name, I've experienced burnout in January. I'm still recovering from that burnout. I do my own things and make myself happy now. I don't feel any need to please my family in that way, anymore.

It's an odd thing and it's difficult for me to explain but when I experience the burnout I can never seem to get back to where I was before it started.

I'll get up to a certain point and then I regress and completely withdraw. It is a really dangerous time for me when it happens because I am in danger of losing everything that I have worked hard to build up.

I think that's why it's import for me to know my own limits.

I'm like this too, I'm scared to take on new opportunities and projects because I don't know if I'm going to be able to see them through. I'm more scared of burning out now because I don't have as much energy as when I was younger, but also because I have a lot more to lose now.

This has been my experience in the working environment too. After a year or two in a job I would get to a place where I wasn't really coping anymore. Like you I wasn't diagnosed for most of this so I didn't know why it kept happening. Now I've been diagnosed for just over a year. I feel like I'm coming out of the other side of it - understanding myself and my limits better. For me it has helped. I have a job interview this week which is a step down from the professional level I was working at before so I hope it fits better with my ability to work longterm. (The step down is more to do with increasing physical limitations due to physical medical conditions but I think having a little less responsibility will help wih the ASD too as I won't be expected to do so much.)

I hope your diagnosis is helpful for you and you are able to use this knew knowledge to make things better in your work. All the best!

I have to admit, when I first read your reply, I was really not too happy. So I didn't reply right away because I don't want to get in cyber-arguments; that's the exact reason I quit Facebook!! But I'm over it now.

Anyway, what you said about stopping doing the things that make you pass as NT, that's exactly what's been causing me burnout. And I only "fake it" like this at work, hence work is the cause of my burnout. And the burnout I experience impacts me 24/7.

After having read several replies from software developers on this thread, and after having spoken to an engineer I know, I seems clear, and I agree completely, that going that route is a big investment that could likely lead to another poor fit. The one place I have had the most success was in academia; teaching in grad school and then teaching HS. So I'm considering returning to that route, and I'll continue iOS app development just for fun.

Do any of you feel like it's hard to relax at night after work, due to pressures during the day? And if so, what helps when you can relax? At work I try to mask less when I can, but that's not always possible. Sometimes in off hours I'm too used to feeling "on" or prepared for some interaction because of feeling that way at work.

Oh, ok. Thank you for helping me understand how it works for you. I hope you did not think I was trying to argue with you or invalidate how you are affected. I was just thinking that you were experiencing a different kind of burnout. I am sorry that I misunderstood. Thank you for helping me understand.

Sounds like going back into teaching would be a great thing for you.

Any pearls of wisdom on how to move fwd from burnout. My hfa attributes came on strong after a series a major stress events and seem to be worsening. Now it is very difficult to keep things together. I am disorganized, forgetful, and have less executive functioning than before. This has been a progression over the past 10 years and is now reaching critical mass.

Thanks

burn out does not really mean that you have overworked your circuits and can no longer operate efficiently in your current mode, burnout means that for some reason you have lost your enthusiasm to keep on the path that you were on.
that's what i think anyway m'lady.

gawd. how self absorbed. this is another persons thread.

my bad, i should start a new thread, not used to online posting and was desperate for some further advise.

and yes, i am self absorbed, i have aspergers, i am depressed, and going through a hard time. so be it.

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Last edited by b9 on 26 Aug 2016, 9:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

cool whatever. i wouldn't have a clue what to say and i don't really care anyway. just proceed normally