More Sensory Overload - Advice?understanding Please
Hey
Kinda new here
Saw another shrink
Have PDD, ADHD and SPD
Started a new job and it all went to sh*t. Had complete emotional overload. Left place of work feeling dizzy, panicked, sick, wanting to burst into tears. Cried in work due to being hired for a position that was way over my skill level. Boss speaking to me in a very disrespectful manner and I finally had enough and quit. She convinced me to come back tomorrow in a different position in the business.
At home now and the feeling of exhaustion is hard to even describe. I feel spent, empty, I started seeing spots in my perpheril vision and that really freaked me out. My whole body is tingling, I cant close my eyes. I am so so so tired. I had a meltdown and now I have shut down. I cant think, move, have any sound, sitting here in silence. My heart is racing. I took painkillers as I felt a headach come on. I took my ritalin meds today and they are wearing off now.
I feel like I need to sleep for 2 days. Someone calling later to my home and I am dreading it. All I want to do is wrap a blanket around me and watch really easy Tv and not speak for 2 days. I'm hungry but have lost ability to move. The tingling and vibrating feeling in my body is numbing.
I have read a few posts about the meltdown and shutdown but havent read much about the extreme exhaustion I feel after the meltdown, I guess its the shutdown but I still feel like I cant realx. UGGGHHH!! !
Would love to hear that I am not alone in this extreme exhaustion after a meltdown.
I know the feeling. To me, emotional overload also happens when someone is being too clingy and it stresses me out, so I turn the phone off and isolate, or scream and rant (meltdown). Physical overload is when there's too many noises, sounds, lights, too much sensory input. I tend to stay away from situations like that. I tend to get shutdowns when this happens.
In my experience, the best way to fix this is to do things slowly, little by little, not everything at once. Don't push your limits too much. Back off a little. Don't overdo stuff. I understand jobs can be harsh and people tell you what to do there, but if there's a possibility you can find a better position, something less demanding, something you can handle, then do it.
I've never worked so far cause I'm still in college, but I'm scared of jobs and emotional and sensory overload is a huge fear of mine.
You're definitely not alone. Meltdowns and shutdowns are always painful. Time and experience will teach you to live with those and they even make you stronger after a while. It's normal to feel exhausted though, this is why you should always rest after an episode. Taking a nap is the best thing. It restores you completely.
I get this way. And no, I don't need to be on disability. Its hard, but hard doesn't always mean not worth it. I respect that other people have different paths, but for me, it would be really hard to live on disability. I find great meaning in work. I just have to take more time than average to recover my energies after a stressful time at work.
Starting a new job is tiring. Going through the drama of realizing you are over your head is tiring. I'm rather impressed that you were both offered and willing to take a different role that might be a better fit.
Ritalin and high stress situations make poor combinations. When you are in a high stress situation, your adrenal glands are already pumping out Adrenalin, your body's natural stimulant. So, you might have kind of overdosed. Its OK. It will wear off. But keep that in mind. Using Ritalin as a way of avoiding the rest you need will come back to haunt you.
If you want my advice, I would call you boss and ask her if you can take a day or two to recover before starting the new role. Let her know that you really want to do a good job and the best chance of you being able to do that will be if you take a day to recharge and reset your energy levels to normal. I've been a supervisor and that feels like a perfectly reasonable request to me. (I used to work with developmentally disabiled people. We did not want you there all cranky and depressed. The job is too hard as it is!)
I applied for disability in March. Decided I would try again after not working in a year and a half. Last job I had i was undiagnosed and have had a lot of bad experiences in work in my life, now aged 37. Got sick of waiting for a decision on disability but it all came back to me today. Ritalin did not help at all for sure but without it who knows, probably would have quit yesterday and walked out and said nothing so I made some progress by talking to the boss before I left.
My OT tells me because of the SPD I should not work in the kitchen (it was a chef position) and I am a cook at most.
My real passion is making and editing videos, vjing and tomorrow we set off to a festival where we built a geodesic dome, it will be filled with music, poitin and various other entertainments. I organised everything with a lot of help from my boyfriend and we built the dome together. My point is I am not able to make any money this way really, not now anyway but feel completely useless after this last fiasco. My attempt at trying to be normal. BIG MASSIVE FAIL!
Was told I cant do kitchen work anymore and I thought I would try again. I dont want to be on disability at all but I cant do a normal job. Dammit.
BirdInFlight
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I can totally relate to your mental, emotional and physical reactions because I used to get exactly this way when I first graduated on secondary school (same as moving on up to junior high in the US). Things were so stressful for me I came home this same kind of wreck most days. It's a nightmarish feeling.
I also have experienced this in the workplace too; it's the reason why I too would sometimes only last one day at a new job and just never want to go back. I stuck at other jobs longer, and then finally the only thing I lasted more than a year at was when I went self employed -- 23 years and counting now. But it took that dramatic change to be able to stay working instead of unable to bear the situation.
I'm not saying everyone should go that route, but I do think the next best thing is the task of finding a type of work, and a workplace, that is the nearest thing to tolerable. Every job and every work environment and set of co-workers and bosses is different, and finding a good fit can mean all the difference between wanting to run screaming from the place, or finding that you could happily show up there for the rest of your life.
I do absolutely relate to how you feel.
I've never had Sensory overload, but My sensory issues are so mild that No one can tell I have them. Though, I still get upset by louder things. Like, Fire alarms. My Middle schools fire alarm are loud as f**k. They're louder than normal ones. Like I still don't like specific clothing, but There mild. So, I don't really experience it, therefore, I can't understand. I have played a online Simulator game of it called, Auti-sim. Though that is about it. Plus it isn't really that accurate. :lol
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My OT tells me because of the SPD I should not work in the kitchen (it was a chef position) and I am a cook at most.
My real passion is making and editing videos, vjing and tomorrow we set off to a festival where we built a geodesic dome, it will be filled with music, poitin and various other entertainments. I organised everything with a lot of help from my boyfriend and we built the dome together. My point is I am not able to make any money this way really, not now anyway but feel completely useless after this last fiasco. My attempt at trying to be normal. BIG MASSIVE FAIL!
Was told I cant do kitchen work anymore and I thought I would try again. I dont want to be on disability at all but I cant do a normal job. Dammit.
Oh, Geeze. I didn't realize you were in a kitchen. No. Kitchen BAD. People don't understand this, but I won't do any work/volunteering in a kitchen. They think I want to avoid the dishes like they want to avoid the dishes. They have no idea how much of a terrible place kitchens are for people with my sensitivities. The funniest disconnect is they try to talk it up by saying that its a great place to socialize while you work. Ah. No. I can barely hear my own thoughts above all the clatter, much less focus on someone else speaking. Which makes direction following non-existant.
Can your disability services provide training to switch feilds? There are dozens of other skilled labor jobs out there that won't be so chaotic.
Can you use earbuds to drown some of this out? Is there a way to visually block any of it out?
I overheard my autistic husband giving his autistic sister some very good career advice the other day. He is super successful at his job and has been there for over 15 years. Let me see if I can remember what he said.
Um...he said to think of your boss and co-workers as NPCs (non playable characters) in a video game, such as Legend of Zelda. He said they will come up to you and say something, blah, blah, blah, and you just find a short generic script to respond with, then go about your business.
He said that you should NEVER attempt to do all your assigned work, because you will only be given more, to the point where no one could possibly do the workload. This was an important tip. I wish I had known this when I was working (and I'm NT). He says no one completes all their assigned work. Just do most of it.
If anyone asks you what you are doing or tries to hurry you up say I'M SO SWAMPED. This is what everyone else is saying when people ask them.
He said to work on accepting that you cannot complete all of the tasks, do all of the work, or make everything at work the way you think it should be. Some of it will be wrong because you are working with stupid people. Just let it go and go home at the end of the day.
If you cannot handle the stress, he said to go to an urgent care doctor (not sure where you are) and ask for emergency stress medication such as Ativan or Xanax. I would add here that you could also use something like an emergency beer or half a beer, but obviously you can't drink at work, just home. Emergency medication you could use at work.
I hope some of that helps. Good luck.
This may not be at all possible in some work situations, and it's not a cheap solution, but I find noise cancelling headphones to be indispensable. They don't help when people need to talk to you but just the absence of fluorescent light hum, HVAC noise, and other random office noises makes me so much calmer that when someone does approach me I'm in a better space to respond calmly. The fact that they're very obvious when I'm wearing them also means I have a few seconds to get ready while I stop my drone music and take them off.
While I'm on the subject, Steve Roach is my best friend ever. He writes the droniest, most formless music that's perfect to mask any sounds the headphones don't filter out; with just enough structure to them to not become more background noise. Your mileage may vary. Music just happens to be my Special Interest.
Also Steve's not really my friend, although I did get his autograph at a concert.
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"In theory, theory is the same as practice; but in practice it isn't." -- Anonymous Bosch
I used to have these episodes, but once they made me so sick I stopped eating I no longer had the energy.
Years later, I still don't eat enough to muster that kind of energy. And I've found that wearing sunglasses all day even indoors is quite relieving. It makes the world a little easier to handle, the noises, unexpected people coming around corners, etc.
Hey, you'all. You can't wear ear plugs or noise cancelling head phones in a kitchen. That would be dangerous, for one thing. Its a chaotic environment and you need to be aware of what's going on with you. Also, you need to hear and follow directions. I don't know how deaf people manage. Certainly some of them have had a restaurant. But a boss in a typical restaurant is most certainly going to expect you to listen and not block out sound.
Working in a kitchen would be horrible for me. I can't tolerate the noise some plates do. It drives me insane if I don't block that sound out. It doesn't happen with every plate and all the time, but it's something I'd definitely avoid. I don't know if it's a common thing, but plates making noises are horrible for me.
I don't recommend headphones for this type of job, as others said.
I don't recommend headphones for this type of job, as others said.
Right? Kitchens are hell on earth for this autistic person. I hate even walking through a working commercial kitchen.
StarTrekker
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I definitely understand where you're coming from. I've been sent home from work in the middle of the day due to sensory overload-induced panic/meltdowns before. Fortunately I work for a company whose job it is to help those with disabilities, so they were very understanding, but it was still humiliating and made me feel like a failure.
Do your bosses know about your autism? Do they actually understand what autism means for you? You would probably do well to request that some accommodations be put in place, perhaps a quiet empty space where you can go to decompress, permission to leave the kitchen and take a walk/perform other mentally restorative tasks for 15-20 minutes or so on an as-needed basis, ability to choose tasks which are minimally overwhelming for you, etc. I agree with others here however, kitchens are a nightmare. I used to work as a dish washer in a fast food restaurant. Worst. Experience. Ever.
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