Does my child have autism??? WORRIED DAD!!

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Oh! My son also didn't speak his first word until he was 2.5, and didn't use more than 30 words until he was 3.5. The he just started talking and didn't shut up! Lol! He was a great communicator even without the speech, sign language, grabbing our arms, babbling, etc. He made himself understood (we helped by teaching and using a lot of sign), but he didn't use words. I think the fact that we let him know that we understood him really helped with his social-emotional development. He knew that he could communicate with us and that we'd respond. We had to fire a speech therapist that was too insistent that he use words too early. He was too frustrated and he actually became more distant with her. Therapy shouldn't be a "fight", IMO. So, if he's not talking, he's probably still communicating. Honor that! We switched to a speech therapist that focused on joint attention and making sure that when he did want to communicate, he knew how to get someone's attention and the proper order of the request/statement (pragmatics, even using sign). Then once he started talking, we focused on pronunciation and sentence complexity. Now his vocabulary is above grade level, his articulation is fine. We're just working on some receptive delays that are likely related to an auditory processing issue. So, it's all school readiness stuff.

Thank you! Our son has his first evaluation tomorrow(mainly to go over his medical history), so it's the start.

He understands when I say "no" before he does something, he understands when I ask him for the moon, has lots of eye contact and is constantly looking back to see if I'm watching what he's doing, now if he takes off running he'll stop until he sees me that I'm looking at him, if he doesn't see me he'll look for me. But if he sees a pet he won't care where i am, I'm guessing that could be normal with little kids. Loves to play with other kids, loves to chase them and to have them chase him. He's still biting when he plays with other kids, that could be normal but again may be not. If my wife is singing and stops he'll say "Ta" as if he wants her to keep singing, and he says every time she stops singing. He's responding to his name more. But what really worries me is that he's not using any real words and not pointing. He knows how to point though, if he's touching something he's doesn't know what it is he uses his index finger to carefully touch it(for example I had a scratch the other day and he was touching my scratch with his index finger). A lot of good signs, but still things that are not so good.

I pray he improves once he starts speech and occupational therapy...

Your son and mine sound like the same person! It was the lack of pointing (joint attention) that I noticed first when he was around 9 mo old. He didn't really start pointing until he was a little over two, and that was after ABA helped. My other ASD son was the same way. And when he did start pointing, it was with his middle finger - oy!! Lol!

During the first appointment of his evaluation we were told that the behaviors could be related to his age, but if by the end of the evaluation(4 more appointments) they suspected autism they would him him that diagnosis so he could get therapy just to make sure, and if he didn't have It then great. We were also mentioned something called apraxia, and that sometimes it can either coexist with autism or be confused with autism. I've been reading about it and some traits sound very similar to some of Asd. We have an appointment with ECI today.

@Pddtwinmom Would you mind telling me a little more about your son?? What other good things That you noticed? What other flags did you notice?? Thank you so much!! !

So glad that you got the process started. Hopefully you'll get answers soon. As for apraxia, very, very few kids actually have this. It seems to always come up when there's a speech delay, but the true rates are so low that it's not very likely.

Things I noticed:

1) at nine months, no pointing and no attempts to draw my attention to "something cool". Not birds, cars driving by, etc. Most children will already be saying the equivalent of "what is that?" using pointing and babbling. My child still didn't do it at 12 mo either. (Joint attention)

2) Wouldn't follow my point. If I pointed at something, he would look at my finger and not at the thing. (Joint attention)

3) Spinning. He spins any circular object. He could spin a dime by 12 mo. Then he would look at the spinning object from all angles. With his toy cars, he would turn them over and spin the wheels. He'd get very upset if you tried to stop him or join in. (Stimming)

4) if you blocked his path, he would just try to go around (at 12 mo). He wouldn't look at you and babble the equivalent of "move". Basically, a child is supposed to understand some social elements at that age. So, they're supposed to communicate with people (yell at you or babble a question, badsically recognize that you're a person and they need to communicate with you to get what they want). Instead, my son acted like I was a couch or other obstacle. He'd just climb over me or go around.

5) Speech delay. He had no words and 12 mo and didn't babble.

Those were the main ones.

Thank you ! !
Did you notice any improvement with the gfcf diet???? Did you notice a lot of babbling ??
My son babbles a lot!! But almost all of it is on his own, not in response to something we say.
ECI said they wouldn't able to do anything related to autism until he's 3, but they offered speech and OT therapy, and will be looking for a place that does ABA and floor time therapy. I talked to a couple of moms and they said the diet showed improvements, and told me to give it a try since I had nothing to lose.

Can you go to a family therapist or something or to a PH D therapist and tell them what your concerns are about your son and they might give you suggestions to work with your child? This wouldn't be an attempt to "fix" him but it will like help your child. I would recommend The Difficult Child by Stanley Turecki and The Challenging Child by Stanley I. Greenspan. These books are written about kids who are "normal" but have struggles due to their own personalities and needing a different kind of parenting approach that isn't covered in parenting mags and books and they give out suggestions what the parent can do to help their child.

Sometimes parents think their kid has something when in fact their child is just "difficult" or "challenging." If your child does indeed have autism, you would know because I am sure none of these approaches would have worked because the problem would still be there after doing those new approaches. I think these books are written for parents to give them hope their kid is "normal" and help them accept their child for the way they are instead of seeing them as broken and pushing unnecessary treatments on them making it worse for their child but I also think these books can also be misused by parents who are in denial so they might use these books to justify their thinking that their kid is "normal" and they are not autistic or ADHD or have SPD, etc.

Also I think these books can be used for parents to use try these approaches first before deciding their child has something so they don't put any harm on them because the last thing I am sure they would want is thinking their kid has something so they act like their kid is broken so they attempt to try and "fix" them by pushing therapy onto them that is unnecessary only making it worse for the child because they then grow up thinking there is something wrong with them and what they do isn't normal only to find out there are "normal" people out there who do the exact same thing as them and then they realize they are normal and bam they feel resentment and anger for what they went through as a child and how their parents treated them when in fact they were just introverted or more into their world or just very sensitive or just more active than other kids.

Also I think these books can be used to help parents figure out what they should accept in their special needs child. I saw one review on Amazon for The Difficult Child and it was written by a parent who said they have an autistic child and how this book had helped them.

He improved steadily, but he was getting early intervention at the same time, so I can't say that it was the diet. I do believe that his tummy didn't hurt as badly and his pooping improved, so maybe that helped him physically feel better enough to maximize what he got from the therapy? We did the diet for two years. And it's a healthy diet for anyone (as long as you add in calcium), so I don't feel bad about it. It can't hurt.

Are you in the states? I think you may be getting bad advice about the therapy.

Yeah we live in Texas, ECI evaluation was to see how much of a delay he had, he's 18 months and they said he has a 12 month speech delay because he doesn't have any words, he also showed some other delays due to the not pointing and not turning when called and things like that, but they said they don't evaluate for autism, and if he gets the diagnosis somewhere else, therapy for it would have to start when he turns 3. And because of the delay he has they'll do speech and OT starting by the end of November. I've found other places that would proved therapy for autism but he needs a diagnosis first.

I've read a lot of good things about the diet, but also a lot of people have told me not to put my child through it. He had a really bad allergic reaction to wheat/rice cereal when he was about 4 months,a lot of vomiting and dehydration, he was beloved to have something called FPIES, so we stayed away from those cereals. He poops every 2,3 days, sometimes normal, sometimes shows signs of constipation, so the diet could help.

If he had a bad reaction to wheat/rice cereal, gluten free could potentially help. For me, the casein (milk) was the bigger problem. So, GFCF worked over here too. And what are you putting your child through on the diet? No cows milk - give them calcium and vitamin d fortified almond milk. No gluten? Do quinoa and oats. I think most people think the diet doesn't taste good and so they think that you're torturing the kid. That's not true. Quinoa and chicken tastes great. Oatmeal made with almond milk with raisins is delicious. I guess people think no butter, bread, or cheese = no life. It actually = healthier life. But, I guess it could be a hard sell in TX . If it helps, it was hard enough to convince my family. My southern mama thinks she knows everything! The downside is that the diet is expensive.

As for ASD, they can absolutely begin therapy before 3 yrs old. But it wouldn't be ECI. You would need to go to your pediatrician and get a referral to a specialist to do the evaluations. Once they're done and if ASD is the diagnosis, you can then begin therapy. It probably depends on your insurance how much each of those steps would cost. But if you think something is up, I would pursue it. My boys were diagnosed at 16 and 20 mo, and their ASD therapists began coming to the house shorty thereafter. Early intervention still came too (they started that at 12 mo). One thing doesn't preclude the other.

I say that gluten free could help because wheat has gluten and all of the commercial baby cereals do too, even if they say that they're rice or oatmeal. So his vomiting could have been gluten related. I'd think of that as a red flag. Doesn't mean that he always won't be able to tolerate it, but maybe it's making him feel worse than he otherwise could be feeling.

And pooping every 2-3 days isn't outrageous, but maybe he'd feel better and therefore be able to develop faster if he went more often. Daily is generally the best. He could be low-level constipated most of the time and that makes you feel icky and hurts your energy and concentration.

Just looked up FPIES. If rice and oats are really a problem, there are other gluten free grains. As I mentioned, quinoa is one.

Yeah, it was the first time he had that cereal, had a really really bad reaction, went to several Dr.s and even they weren't familiar with FPIES, but agreed that he could have it, and we avoided the cereal since then even though his stomach may be able to tolerate it as you said, but also since things he eats have gluten and casein, like you mentioned, it could help. He's had normal rice, but I'll try to avoid it and look into Quinoa .

Yeah some people said its torturing a child, but if it could possibly help him, I don't see the harm.

I know I worry too much, but as I parent I know my son, I've been told "he's normal, kids his age do all those things, I know something's up with him, and I'd hate myself if I didn't try something that won't harm him.

We had a tough time finding someone to evaluate him at 18 months(here in dallas), fortunately we found 1 Dr. that is evaluating him and if he ends up being in the spectrum he'll be able to get therapy really soon.

ECI gave us the option to do house therapies, but I feel that he can get waaay more distracted at the house??
Usually if he's not playing with his blocks or cars or wanting to go outside, he'll go to cabinets and take Tupperware out and make a mess, or go and get clothes out of drawers, things like that I feel can distract him easier than by going to the ECI place. When he got evaluated 2 days ago, he was playing with the things they gave him, and also was looking for the attention of the two ladies that were doing the evaluation. He love new places, and exploring, so may be that'll help? Im indecisive about that....

Sounds like you're on top of it. Good job!

And since I had twins who both needed therapy, leaving the house had zero appeal. Too much work and too much time lost. You know your child best, so if you think it's best to go to a different location, go for it!

Putting aside your son's development for a moment, worried dad, I wonder what your conception of AS is, and whether your fear is arising from something you read and if so, what and by whom?

PS There is a rule against cross posting on Wrong Planet. You opened a similar topic in the Parents' Forum so I will lock that and you can continue on this one.