For me, maybe a combination of feeling born the wrong species and being abused and always being expected to submit to another person. Never being able to be myself or feel free. Always being told there was something wrong with me or I need to stop doing X. Not being able to get people to see MY side of the story. I hated human beings even as a young child. In movies and stories, I was always on the side of the animal character...even if the animal character was supposed to be evil. I never felt bad for people who were hurt by animals because I figured they had it coming somehow. Only stupid people or people who didn't know me very well were dumb enough to ask me stupid questions like would I save my neighbor over my dog/pet. If you know me, you know exactly who'd I'd choose. I once had a bearded dragon I loved more than anything and if someone so much as looked at her wrong, I was ready to kill them. My mom says I loved the bearded dragon so much because it was "on my terms" whatever that meant. I think she was just jealous of the bearded dragon. The bearded dragon never yelled at me or told me to stop being obsessed with things or verbally abused me like she did. I had a dog I loved too and my mom seemed jealous of him as well. Forcing him to live outside, and blaming all the dog fights on him...I saw HER dog starting the fights but she refused to believe me and always wondered why I resented her dog.
I felt something simmaliar to how trans people probably feel about being born the wrong sex. My problem was I felt like I was born the wrong species. It was so deep and painful too but my mother would never allow me to talk about it. That's really all I wanted, someone to talk to about how I felt like I was born the wrong species but my mother would just tell me I was born a human being and had to learn to deal with it. I think my mom has some undiagnosed AS because empathy just isn't her thing (she also can't see something from another person's perspective...it's all about her)
I don't know, I just never felt I was human. It doesn't bother me as much as it did back then, and honestly I'm not sure exactly what species I was "supposed" to be instead of a human, but then perhaps because I can finally talk to people about it and I don't feel so "caged" like I did when I was a child. I no longer live with my parents...my mom couldn't admit her own issues and projected everything onto me, wouldn't let me grow up, and abused me (verbally and emotionally but claims I abused her verbally and emotionally) forcing me to run away from home. Anyway, I've always been a misanthrope, but doubt I was born one. I just found animals easier to relate too since they too suffered the same way I did.
_________________
Spell meerkat with a C, and I will bite you.