Do people misunderstand your intentions?

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Can anyone figure out what "Rule 43" is? LOL Bounce it around for a while and figure it out... and let's have some fun!

Could you give some examples of what they find offensive or outlandish? Remember that NTs by nature have greater emotional and social sensitivities than us so it's logical to treat them as such and adjust our behaviour accordingly. "...notes on how people behave, utilize tone, and pace conversations", very good. It's good that you're practicing these things but you should also know that some comments are invariably offensive no matter how you vary tone, body language, etc. and therefore you must use different approaches to criticism and those comments which NTs find offensive. One method I've learnt from my sister (after I had accidentally offended her a number of times) that potentially emotionally hurtful comments like, "Your music composition lacks strong motivic organisation and development" should be balanced and preferably bookended with comments like "But your sense of phrasing and iterative rhythm is excellent, continue this in future". When NTs have conversations they have a much deeper awareness of emotional subtexts where we would only be aware of the salient points of logic presented by our interlocutor's speech. If you'd like to chat with me (PM me if you want) further about this or other topics I'd love to oblige; it's comforting to see that there are other aspies my own age going through the same struggles.

Yes, we should try to adjust our behavior to accommodate NTs. However, doesn't that also mean that NTs should try to adjust their behavior to accommodate us if they happen to know that we have Asperger's? And if they don't understand Asperger's and how it affects our behavior, then shouldn't they try to learn more about it? By the way, this mutual accommodation of each other's behavior should work between any two people in a social situation, and not just if one of them is on the Autism spectrum. All people have to learn proper social skills in dealing with all sorts of other people in different social situations. Something that anybody could be susceptible to but would especially pertain to people on the Autism spectrum is not knowing how to react to another person if that person doesn't act the way that we would expect them to or hope that they would.

typically, people become offended upon my remarking that i find a certain activity to be pointless. of course, i don't just say, "this sucks and it's boring, i want to stop," you know, i attempt to be polite if i ever do find it necessary to make it known that i'm uninterested in something. usually i'd just say, "why are we doing this again?" or something similar that isn't bluntly making it clear that i'm bored out of my skull.

i think a lot of the shock others experience when i say something often has a lot to do with the fact that i don't speak very much. since i have no friends outside of the internet and suffer from agoraphobia, i'm basically always in my room. even when attending school, i only physically attended once a week and was almost always completely silent. if i said something out loud, or asked a question, i'd usually be met with gasps and laughter. this often occurred regardless of what i said.
sometimes i'd impulsively say something risky, something intentionally bratty and facetious. by saying these things, it was never my intention to incite specific reactions from those around me. i've never fed off the reactions of others. it was almost always a knee-jerk reaction to hearing something that bothered me. i fully recognize why people would laugh and gawk when i would say something like this, but it pains me to think of people being amazed by me merely speaking.
but yes, i truly think a large part of why people often react to me in an extreme manner is the fact that me stating anything pertaining to how i feel is unexpected. it's not that i don't feel anything--i'd actually argue that i feel way more than the average neurotypical––i just don't feel obligated to tell others what i'm thinking and feeling, while most people simply say everything that pops into their heads.
i mean, that's not all, though. of course, there are times during which i do say things which indicate a huge lack of understanding of unwritten, unspoken social rules. for example, i've been in restaurants before and accidentally loudly stated that the food i ordered and had began eating was disgusting while the waitress was only a couple feet away. i understand, now, that this was extremely rude and quite foolish, but in that moment i didn't quite understand the error in what i had done. i thought, "i don't like the food, so why can't i just state this fact?"
my mother angrily told me to be quiet then glared at me and i felt my stomach sink and my face turn warm.. i looked around and saw the waitress and felt horribly ashamed of myself. i stared at my lap for the rest of the evening.
i was embarrassed and upset with myself, but i'm not angry with my mother for pointing out my behavior. i didn't mean to be rude and inappropriate, but my behavior was perceived as me attempting to act in such a way, which i do not want, so i quickly learned that blurting out such a thing in a restaurant is entirely unacceptable. i think constructive criticism is extremely important for individuals with autism, but since autistic people have issues with tone and whatnot, a remark from someone intended to be helpful can often be registered as being berated or shamed.
sometimes when i'm irritated and experiencing a sensory overload i'll tell someone to shut up, or begin endlessly criticizing what they're doing. it's an issue, it's a very sad issue but it only occurs when i'm on the brink of a meltdown and am just trying to grit my teeth and bear all the pressure in my head.

before i was diagnosed with autism, i always heard people refer to autistic individuals as beings incapable of being outside of "their own little world." i was often told this.
i had a really exaggerated idea of autism in my mind for my entire life, as i believe most people not diagnosed as a child did. i had believed that every single autistic person was a completely mute 6 year old boy wailing in a corner, unable to dress himself. i had been told by many people that i was likely autistic, from random peers in middle school to therapists. i always quickly rejected the possibility because of this extremely exaggerated idea of autism that was implanted into my mind by television and the internet.
so, to finally be diagnosed, then be told "you're just always in your own little world," by people was really, i don't know, just, depressing. it's depressing to have the feeling of being disconnected from people, neurotypicals in particular, not only reinforced, but confirmed as not only a feeling but as a matter of fact.

autistic people should actively try to learn about social rules, tone, and context. individuals without autism should actively try to learn about the social mannerisms of the autistic people in their life. one autistic person may use sarcasm from time to time, one autistic person may never be sarcastic and always entirely means what they say. it's important for neurotypicals to pay attention and ask questions so they can eventually be able determine whether or not an autistic person is being facetious, entirely inappropriate, innocuous, etc.
i'm soft and sensitive but also calculative and logical. it's an odd balance. i'm not as hell-bent on logic as a lot of autistic people, so perhaps this writing pertaining to emotional reactions won't make much sense to some, but i truly hope what i'm writing will resonate.

I completely agree.