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Struggling To Have A Conversation While The TV's On

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Joe90
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22 Jun 2017, 7:13 am

SaveFerris wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
I find it hard too, not so much because of the background noise, but because the TV is a distraction to most people and I get afraid of a scene or whatever suddenly appearing on the TV what the person I'm talking to wants to listen to and being shushed mid-sentence. Sometimes people stare at the TV whilst having a conversation, even when they aren't following anything on the TV, so I find it difficult to know if they are trying to watch it or not.



Who shushes you, your not a child ffs? If someone shushed me I would ignore it the first time , the second time I would have to give them a piece of mind ( if I was feeling confident or very cross )


I don't mean I rudely get shushed. It's just that the TV is distracting and if there's something that unassumingly catches somebody's attention, it's awkward.


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SaveFerris
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22 Jun 2017, 7:39 am

Joe90 wrote:

I don't mean I rudely get shushed. It's just that the TV is distracting and if there's something that unassumingly catches somebody's attention, it's awkward.


IMO If shushing is done by an adult to an adult just because they want to hear something else it is bad manners


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22 Jun 2017, 8:14 am

SaveFerris wrote:
I often struggle to have a conversation with someone while the TV or Radio is on as I unable to concentrate while there is background noise , it's almost as if my mind tries to do both - listen to the person and the TV at


I hate it if there is a TV on when people are expected to talk with each other. I sometimes ask if it could be turned off, but it doesn't always go down too well. But if the TV is on, I usually either shut down and tune out, or else I have to leave the room.



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22 Jun 2017, 9:15 am

SharkSandwich211 wrote:
YES this drives me nuts!! It is one of the things that will throw me into a rage. The additional input confuses everything in my brain and I can't focus. Just writing about it gets me tense. Something similar happens when I am trying to speak with someone and there are other noises going on around the room. My brain tries to make sense of each individual input source and its' direction while trying to focus on the conversation and I can't focus on anything and then my brain starts shutting down.


Could this be related to ADD ?[/quote]


I'm not sure. When I experience it, it feels more like a sensory processing issue. It feels like the sensory input inhibits my ability to pay attention. If the other inputs were not present my attention would be just fine.



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22 Jun 2017, 9:38 am

I definitely struggle with conversation when the TV is on. I can do other things with the TV on, but talking to others is hard for me.


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22 Jun 2017, 9:47 am

I always thought I was the only one, it is relieving to see that other autistic people are like this too! :o


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HauntedKnight
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22 Jun 2017, 10:08 am

Yes, I just pause whatever is on the tv when someone wants to speak to me.



teksla
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22 Jun 2017, 11:37 am

SaveFerris wrote:

Is this considered an autistic trait?

Could it be related to any other disorder?

It is typical trait of autistic people, but there is a disorder called "Auditory processing Disorder" which is difficulties sorting, prioritising and processing sounds.


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23 Jun 2017, 2:47 am

Go read about aspergers and noise filtering



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23 Jun 2017, 3:29 am

Yes, totally. TV, radio, stereo, loud restaurant full of other chatter, even loud noise of passing traffic in a busy street -- I struggle to have a conversation when there is any background noise of a significant level. I also struggle when there is more than one person involved in the conversation and a lot of crosstalking and interruption instead of people taking turns.

I recently posted my own post about this kind of thing, where a friend put on some music in his car while we were driving somewhere, and I experimented for the first time with telling someone (him) that actually it makes it very hard for me to continue a conversation.

He then goaded me with that every time we spoke after that, even playing music when we talked on the phone as his "jokey" way to say he had to wrap up and end the call -- which I did not find amusing.

I struggle with it because my brain starts to feel overloaded with the various inputs of sound. I "pay attention" to both sources of sound without being able to help it, and my brain starts to seize-up, I can't concentrate on what the other person is saying, I can't concentrate on forming my thoughts as to what I'm saying -- it all becomes overload. If I push myself to just keep going anyway, it's a direct road to meltdown or shutdown.



SaveFerris
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23 Jun 2017, 5:50 am

SharkSandwich211 wrote:
I'm not sure. When I experience it, it feels more like a sensory processing issue. It feels like the sensory input inhibits my ability to pay attention. If the other inputs were not present my attention would be just fine.


Thanks Shark

HauntedKnight wrote:
Yes, I just pause whatever is on the tv when someone wants to speak to me.


With the advent of pausing live TV you'd think this shouldn't be an issue nowadays :roll:

teksla wrote:
It is typical trait of autistic people, but there is a disorder called "Auditory processing Disorder" which is difficulties sorting, prioritising and processing sounds.


Thanks Teksla , I've looked at APD and it seems a likely candidate if I don't have ASD

Biscuitman wrote:
Go read about aspergers and noise filtering


Thanks BM , I will


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SaveFerris
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23 Jun 2017, 5:51 am

BirdInFlight wrote:
Yes, totally. TV, radio, stereo, loud restaurant full of other chatter, even loud noise of passing traffic in a busy street -- I struggle to have a conversation when there is any background noise of a significant level. I also struggle when there is more than one person involved in the conversation and a lot of crosstalking and interruption instead of people taking turns.

I recently posted my own post about this kind of thing, where a friend put on some music in his car while we were driving somewhere, and I experimented for the first time with telling someone (him) that actually it makes it very hard for me to continue a conversation.

He then goaded me with that every time we spoke after that, even playing music when we talked on the phone as his "jokey" way to say he had to wrap up and end the call -- which I did not find amusing.

I struggle with it because my brain starts to feel overloaded with the various inputs of sound. I "pay attention" to both sources of sound without being able to help it, and my brain starts to seize-up, I can't concentrate on what the other person is saying, I can't concentrate on forming my thoughts as to what I'm saying -- it all becomes overload. If I push myself to just keep going anyway, it's a direct road to meltdown or shutdown.


Sounds like your 'friend' is very ignorant about your issues although humour ( sarcastic humour ) appears to be a natural reaction by most , as if laughter fixes all ailments :roll:

I've never pushed myself through it by grinning and bearing it , at it's worst it starts to feel like I'm losing mind. I've had several breakdowns in my life and if feels like it could be the start of another and that scares the hell out of me.


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BirdInFlight
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24 Jun 2017, 7:43 am

Yes, I did feel like my friend didn't take seriously an issue I was sincerely trying to express in hopes of finally getting something to be the way I need it to be, in a situation where it would only take one person to accommodate that. :(

On a later occasion he did turn the volume down -- so it seems he did take something onboard about it. But still, it isn't fun to sincerely open up about something for the first time, hoping for understanding, and have it made a joke after that.



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25 Jun 2017, 9:47 am

SaveFerris wrote:
I often struggle to have a conversation with someone while the TV or Radio is on as I unable to concentrate while there is background noise , it's almost as if my mind tries to do both - listen to the person and the TV at the same time.

It also happens if a conversation involves more than 2 people speaking at the same time. A group of 4 people having two separate conversations is torturous.

Is this considered an autistic trait?

Could it be related to any other disorder?


I'm alright if the TV is not too loud BUT a loud / busy restaurant or room full of talking people is impossible. I end up smiling and pretending I am following the conversation more than I actually am. It can be frustrating.


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