Am I an Aspie?

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Hi, I'm trying to discover if I'm an aspie or not. My sister has mentioned to me twice in the past few years that i might be. She mentioned it most recently 3 weeks ago, and since then, I've been been frequently googling quirky things about myself to see if i can find a correlation between them and aspergers.

I've taken the AQ twice, last week and today, on separate sites and scored 32 and 38 respectively. I also took the EQ (scored 14) and FQ (scored 64).

I find that most of the traits of aspergers/asd apply to me, but i haven't felt that I've been severely disadvantaged like alot of the people that post on this site. The main things that popped out at me, are feelings of being an alien studying humanity and the constant feeling that I need to act my way through alot of conversation.

A couple things really don't line up, though. For one, i have little to no problem with sensory overload that most aspies talk about. I also never really have had the meltdowns and difficulty with other children while growing up. But that last one might be explainable because i grew up with 9 siblings (8 of them older), so i may have learned the social skills early on.

My biggest concern (the reason i felt compelled to research into this) is that recently, my friends are starting to disperse to different locations due to work and relationships and I'm finding that I have no bloody idea how to fill the gaps that they leave.
Furthermore, I think i missed a huge chance to "date" (always hated that word) a close female friend because of a recently identified fear of intimacy, and a lack of understanding her body language.

I have so much more i want to say but I think I've already made this post much too long. This is my first time posting on a forum (I've never so much as commented on youtube).

So my question, i guess, is "Does this experience sound familiar to anyone?"

Seems pretty plausible to me from what you describe - quite a bit like me.

I was diagnosed a few months ago at age 36, and some of what you describe seems like my situation. I, also, don't have any sensory problems that I am aware of, and haven't had a case that I can think of where I have had something that was definitely a meltdown or shutdown.

I've been pretty socially isolated for most of my life, but there have certainly been cases where I have enjoyed being with people, and even sometimes had friends (wow!). Usually those cases were where we were doing a structured activity like playing a game and not making smalltalk.

If you have the time/funding to get a professional assessment, then I would go for it. Nobody here is qualified to give out a diagnosis, but you at least have some traits based on what you posted. Even if it turns out you don't have autism, you are still welcome to post here on this forum. If it turns out that you do, just remember that you are still the same person you always were and there is nothing to be ashamed of. Welcome to Wrongplanet, by the way !

The thing that convinced me beyond any doubt was when I remembered my "classic" autistic behaviour, my stimming activity, rocking, and that when I was really, really excited I flapped my hands. These are good indicators to look for.

But, also, not essential for a diagnosis. Some stims are quite subtle such as nail biting, leg bouncing, etc. - things that would often be mistaken for fidgeting in a neurotypical. Here's an interesting page listing some common stims, many of which don't seem strange at all: https://insideperspectives.wordpress.co ... /stimming/

Even if you don't have any stims that you can identify, I wouldn't rule out the possibility. I think, short of a diagnosis or talking to a psychologist, the best indicator is the AQ test, which you have already done.

I am not currently looking to get a professional assessment, as I haven't given up yet on testing to see if I can be satisfied by self-diagnosis. I'd rather avoid being in the system for now.

As for stimming, I've rapidly bounced my right knee up and down for as long as i can remember. Same with chewing my nails, whistling, tapping my teeth together lightly and rhythmically. I also walk in circles or back and forth whenever I'm standing with nothing to do. Dunno if thats all classified as stimming.

Edit: Also, when I'm excited (usually while talking about a topic I'm really into) my voice gets really loud without me noticing. People often ask me to talk more quietly at these times.

From what I understand (I'm no expert), that can be stimming, but isn't necessarily. As I said, except for the most obvious stims like rocking and hand flapping, many behaviours could either be stimming or fidgeting.

Personally, I rub my eyebrows, bite my nails, and blow air into my elbow. I've also caught myself biting the hair off of my arm, or gently biting my arm, wrist, or fingers. None of which am I sure is stimming, but could be. My psychologist has generally been reluctant to discuss whether that is "repetitive behaviour".


Definitely like me. Growing up, my parents were often telling me my voice was too loud, and people still sometimes tell me this today.

Benjamin, do you have any special topics/interests you spend a lot of time on and easily get obsessed with?

Yes, to some degree. I would say I have a fairly obsessive personality when it comes to hobbies. I never really like to do things for only a little bit. And i like to go all out. My most recent obsessions have been building myself a huge custom library of songs i really like and rebuilding my view of the world through facts and busting misconceptions. But they're never really that unusual as far as obsessions go.

Last edited by Benjammin0817 on 27 Aug 2017, 8:07 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Alright thanks! Would you describe yourself as more spontaneous, or do you like to plan ahead? How are you in social situations? Do you have any problems with eye contact or reading cues?

I definitely prefer to plan ahead. My friends and family often say i take too long to get ready for events, but I'm the one who always has a lighter or phone charger etc. When i do spontaneous things, it's always because I'm conscious that I need to get used to spontaniety. So like practice.

I would say I'm okay with social situations. Eye contact has been getting easier, but i still find myself missing parts of conversation due to thinking too much about where i'm looking or if someone has really interesting eyes (I really enjoy interesting eyes).

As far as social cues, I'm not too sure how good i am with those. I sometimes get confused at whats appropriate to say in a given situation so i try to just stay silent. I've gotten good at saying alot of qualifying statements such as "forgive me if I'm wrong..." or "I dont really know what you're feeling but..."

Edit: I also have difficulty noticing when women/girls (I think maybe both terms are relevent at my age) are interested in me.

You definitely at least have significant traits. I hope you are able to figure this all out, either by reading things/taking tests or spending more time here!

OK, so its IMPOSSIBLE to diagnose you on a forum. no one (as far as i know) is qualified to diagnose anyone with anything but im sure you know that.

I saw you mentioned that you dont have any sensory problems and then go ON to list a bunch of possible 'stims', stims are a coping mechanism developed to block out or cancel negative sensory input and actually most of the time is needed to function normally. It has a specific purpose. I feel the things you listed off, Bouncing your knee, nail chewing, and tapping your teeth are more like fidgeting and many non autistics partake in these activities. they CAN be stims but like i said, stims are usually very therapeutic, necessary and specific.
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So DO You have sensory input sensitivity or insensitivity?
this is beyond just a slight "bright lights annoy me" or " i dont like the sound of construction sights" because these are normal feelings, more often than not, sensory processing issues are debilitating to an extent. such as not being able to handle grocery stores, school dances, bars, or even just walking down the street.

sensory overload can go one of two ways, Shutdown or Meltdown

Shutdowns can feel sort of like Disassociation but a little different, (at least for me it is) here are some common Shutdown symptoms
- emotional
- speaking ability decrease
- slow reaction times
- "zonked out"
- confusion
- dizziness
- nausea
- sloth-like movements
- inability to move
- cannot understand spoken language

and a meltdown can commonly be described as:
- emotional outburst
- self harm
- hyperventilating
- screaming
- escaping
- more body movements
- more stimming
- lack of communication
- increased echolalia

Some people claim that not EVERYONE on the spectrum experiences sensory overload and many people on the spectrum have a hard time recognizing their own sensory differences.

and as i said, it can also be sensory insensitivity,
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Another thing about people on the spectrum is the repetition, sameness and obsessiveness .:

this can be simply characterized as not liking changed but of course if thats all it took, EVERYONE would be diagnosed with autism. again more often than not autistic people experience a hard time adjusting to change. which means again, shutdowns and meltdowns as listed above.

i suggest doing more research.

on my opinion. again, you haven't really listed any red flags, you mentioned you are a bit socially awkward but that alone cannot be a for sure "autism" flag.

And yet it feels like Benjammin0817 is describing me with everything he said about himself. The possible stims I do are all in the same category as he described, and I've can't say I've every had a shutdown or meltdown the definitively falls into the categories you ZombieBrideXD just mentioned.

And I have been diagnosed with Asperger's.

To me, the most significant red flag that Benjammin0817 listed are the test scores, which very much do fall into a range that suggest that Asperger's is very much a possibility.

I agree that none of us are capable to doing a diagnosis over a forum, and that social awkwardness alone does is not a "sure" autism flag (indeed, nothing is short of a formal diagnosis) , but I think it would be a mistake to disregard the test scores and other observations about your life simply because you don't have "classic" stims or definite meltdown/shutdowns.

I disagree, most self assessments are not reliable due to a confirmation biased and a conflict of interest. All online tests are questionaires that do not go into detail and are left very vague and up to the person taking the test to interprute.

All a high score means is you picked the answers that would give you a higher score, even subconsiously. Self assessments overall i feel are very unreliable.

I agree 100%. My purpose in posting is to create a discussion on this to help me better understand, which is working great. I'm definitely not confident enough right now to self-diagnose. I don't think i would even necessarily be satisfied with a professional diagnosis.



Could stims also be used for understimulation?
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I would say I probably don't have sensory sensitivity. I have to wear sunglasses more than most people, sometimes on overcast days. I don't think that's enough to warrant sensitivity, though. Touch is fine. Hugs feel a bit awkward, but I don't find them unpleasent. I may have a bit of insensitivity to sound, but I think it's most likely bad hearing.
As far as sensory overload goes, i would say i almost never get that unless I'm extremely tired in a very loud high energy place, but that sounds normal to me.
I might have shutdowns every once in a while, but they are always by myself and they consist of waves of despair and exhaustion. Doesn't really sound like a shutdown to me. I wouldn't say i meltdown either. If i get really frustrated, i separate myself from people and stim/fidget more, but I wouldn't say i tend to lose control or anything.
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I like the IDEA of change, and was really happy, for instance, when i got a new phone as my iphone 4 was getting frustrating. I have noticed I strongly avoid changes like getting a new apartment, or my license, or a new job. I doubt thats too far out of the ordinary.

I do get into strict routines though. I feel like the only way i can actually complete everyday tasks is to incorporate them into habits. And it takes alot of effort to add stuff to my list of habits.

As far as red flags go, I don't see too much really obvious stuff. Mostly just a ton of stuff that "could be". I'm being really tentative because I am all too aware of confirmation bias.

Also, something i forgot to mention is I have palilalia. I never knew there was a term for it until i started researching asd.

Anyways, I have a ton more research to do. This is just one more way to gather info. I don't know any aspies, so i thought it would make for irresponsible research if i didn't post.

Did the aspie quiz.
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 132 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 88 of 200

Currently working my way through the 313 question EIQ.