executive non function

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In the far north, suicides, particularly in young men, peak in summer. They just are not getting enough sleep because it is so seldom dark. I've been using a blackout window shade this year, and it helps.

43 years for me. I've just gotten used to getting stuck and having to work through it in my head. At least it can be worked through. I still lose it over the never-ending search for lost things. Its so damn frustrating I have to make myself stop and breathe so I don't smash something. Sorry, I have no advice for you

That was an excellent video on EF. My primary problems are with organising and planning. I also find it hard to do tasks that require multiple steps.
At school I was disorganised and messy.

Other issues for me are time management and problem solving . With the latter if an answer to a question comes easily to me I'm ok but if I have to really think about the answer I flounder and tend to switch off.

You are welcome

I tend strongly away from multi-tasking. I like to stick with one job until it is done, so if I'm active in the shop, the housework is going south. If I have to take a break and work on something else, the first project is really hard to re-start. However, I'm also likely to improve each project as it progresses, taking far longer than anticipated.
Modern life is very hard on ability to focus. If this is a major challenge, you may need to ration screen time and/or take up meditation to make some space available.

Out of all the things that go with Autism, poor executive functuoning is the absolute worse for my husband because it overshadows everything.

People cut him some slack on things, but if he f***s up....

Being late
Forgetting appointments
Forgetting to do a request
Forgets a a birthday, holiday etc..
Can't self start anything without the threat of death on his neck.

Will not drop one task to start another because of an urgent request.

Can make no short cuts in his daily routine, because if he does that he his lost.

Does not follow on things in a timely fashion (calling friends and family)

Everyone write him off as a self centered as*hole. People view him as it always has to be his way or the highway, so they think douche bag.

In the NT world, if you stop what you are doing to help someone else our, or you change up your routine to accommodate someone it means you value and care about that person. My husband literally can't prioritize or just stop doing a task once he gets started without huge amounts of anxiety and fear taking over.

I can take a 5 minute shower. If some calls me up for emergency help, I can help it the door in 15 minute. I do the bare minimum to look appropriate, grab my keys and go.

That request puts my husband in shut down mode. This is how fast he can make it out the door.

15 minutes to wake up in bed.
20 minutes for coffee, medications and more wake up time
40 minutes shower/brush teeth/shave
20 minutes rest because all that has overwhelmed him.
10 to get dressed
15 minutes to panic on Google maps to find the place he needs to go
10 minute before driving to adjust his car exactly so.

1 hour and 40 minutes before he is out the door.

He can not speed it up or drop a step.

Now everyone does not include him on emergency contact forms, or ask him for anything. His family has cut him out of the loop information wise. He had a relative die this month, and they called him a week after the fact. Hurt is an understatement. They figure he has no f***s to give because he never goes out of his way for anyone. Better that he is not there mucking around causing more grief

Noca, you eloquently described exactly how my husband feels.

One time, a parliamentarian was in the middle of a two-hour speech, when an aide told him that the vote had already been taken, and he was wasting time. He still had to finish.
I once had a roommate's father, a history teacher, not miss a word of his story when I had to leave the room to deliver a timely message to another roommate. Seeing me, his wife took inventory of who was present with her, and exclaimed "Who is he talking to now??!"
Many people have to start over at the beginning if they spoil a sentence or a song.

Tawaki, it makes sense to leave your husband off emergency contact lists, but not to resent the disability that makes it wise to do so.

However, I've been in situations where my wise and nonjudgmental accommodations of another person's disability have led to their feeling resentment. They assume that I feel angry about, for example, adding an hour to their estimated meeting time. They've grown to expect people to feel angry, and project that onto my purely practical adjustment to their pattern of inaccurate predictions.

I'd love it if someone told me in advance that it takes them 1 hr. 40 mins. to leave the house, no more, no less, and it was accurate every time. If people want honesty, they should gracefully accept hearing some confusing statements.

Mine are terrible. I often, not thats right, always have lots of complicated (to me at least) things to organise. I plan my appointments using the outlook calendar, but then I have data bases and e-portfolios which which I need to complete and my diary gets busy, changes happen, I make a mess of things and then I can't cope. I mess things up all the time. Its been an issue always but professionally, due to lack of my personal supervision I have gotten away with it, manages to cover things up to those who mattered, not now however, I am closely supervised and I mean close and the anxiety has pushed me over the edge. I meeting my boss tomorrow for the first time since I have been out sick, scary and he now knows I am autistic...dreading it. I think I lost my last two jobs, both in the last 6 months because I have been found out. I am in the wrong line of work and my ego needs to accept this.

I become really anxious quickly is I have multiple demands placed upon me, add a timeframe and I struggle. I would prefer to organise myself my own way, finish each task completely before moving on the next. In the role thats not possible the way things are done and I panic. I am a notorious flapper, a panicker. I will walk in and out of the house several times getting into a state to make sure I have everything ready for the day, and then still lose or forget things, I leave things behind when I leave again and then have to go back for them (120 miles round trip for a laptop cable last time)

Oh and if I get interuped doing a task I find it difficult to get stuck back into it...one task at a time please!!

Good luck meeting your boss! I hope it goes well for you .

Well said (despite your spelling and punctuation...sorry I can't help it). Perhaps I shouldn't be but I'm a little surprised - and even a little impressed - given your age.

I have difficulty being on time for appointments and deadlines. Because I cannot estimate how long any task may take, or estimate how much time is passing, or stop one task to start another quickly, I must complete each step - of only the timed task - as soon as physically possible (including always arriving absurdly early to appointments) then wait idly until I can do more. This results in a lot of wasted time where I do no other work, or have fun, while I wait. It even hurts my sleep the night before an appointment.

I have difficulty completing tasks. Because I cannot automate even basic, routine tasks, or multitask, I must consciously complete every task one at a time. This results in a drain on temporal and mental resources which results in me becoming more and more absent-minded. Because this makes me slow and mentally exhausted, I must neglect everything but top priority.

I have difficulty not losing things, or finding lost things. Because I cannot keep track of many things, I must keep things together in groups and attached to me so I cannot put them down. This results in me not being able to adjust what I bring for different needs. Because I cannot scan an area when I lose something, I must always put and keep things in "their place". This results in me not being able to allow for other people touching my things.

I can't help it. I'm dysgraphic. Age doesn't really mean much when you're autistic. I mean you should know that.

There are small things I've found to help with particular problems. The "where are the keys" problem at work: I now have them on a cord around my neck.

Since my neck luckily stays attached, the keys do too!

Regularly using a few of my "spoons" to de-clutter and reduce my possessions seems to be helping some... when I have enough spoons to remember to do that... it's sort of a circular problem!

What are "spoons?" I limit my supply of cutlery, etc, so that it can all fit in a dish drying rack and never overflow the sink.

"Spoons" is a catch-word within the chronically ill community. I think it's a way of denoting the way that people with chronic illness have to measure out in small portions the limited energy they have in "spoonfuls." I've seen it used among the mentally disordered as well recently.