elsapelsa wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
Wow, that blew me away...
Me too.
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It was very insightful, especially about computer learning and how that each thought/ subthought generates a child thought and branches out from there. A part of it resonates with me with trying to explain my thought system.
For me, written and verbal language is not my first language. I see in my mind, my thoughts are a mix of symbols, visuals, experiences, and movies generated from my imagination and the world around me. I translate those into an internal verbal monologue.
When it comes to speaking or writing, I see my thoughts like a flow chart. Picture being in a roleplay game where you have multiple choice questions to bring up to each NPC character you come across.
My mind plays each option out as I write a sentence or think a thought. If I say what, where will it lead me? Where will it lead the other person? Where am I going from here? My mind generates a potential future, altering it in real time as I gather more information.
At times of frustration I will struggle with this, because I see many possibilities and have to factor which one to follow through to get what result I hope for. But the result has to fit with the context. I have to weight those out. I also factor in emotion. What emotion do I desire to experience. What emotion do I desire the other person to experience. I want the outcome to be peaceful whenever possible. There are times that I may need to be assertive and less afraid to be blunt. But I have to factor in the consequences of each option before I take action. I hate upsetting people, so my usual action is to be as peaceful and polite as possible.
It is kind of like playing a chess game, even though I haven't played the game much. I have to have a plan or strategy or I find myself wasting time in my imagination, generating scenes and ideas but not doing anything with them.