How good are we at masking?

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So I have been told today that I am not that good at masking and I make so obvious that I have ASD.

To be honest, I’m not that bothered what have we got to be ashamed of.

I absolutely agree, but it's hard for me to be brave and be myself since I have had the pressures to fit in drilled into me throughout childhood (when I wasn't aware of my diagnosis and just assumed there was something wrong with me). Over the last years, however, I have realized that faking yourself in order to fit in, although it might help you be more "successful" from a society standpoint, does not seem like a viable road to happiness (at least for me). And happiness is what is important, not "being successful".

Oh and to answer your title question. I'd say I maybe can successfully mask as "normal", but am still seen as extremely anti-social, gloomy, and emotionless. So the end result is people still don't want to interact with me.

I've never really tried to fake it, which is apparently unusual in a female aspie. I never saw the point. I was always too headstrong to pretend to be someone that I'm not.

Now that I am in my 30s I feel more comfortable with social pleasantries. Maybe I have rehearsed them enough for them to sound natural. I will now ask my workmates what they plan to do for their weekend and so on. Once upon a time I didn't see the point.

I still don't see the point of "how are you?" I grabbed (not literally) someone the other day to ask them a question and he was like, "oh, hi, how are you?" and shook my hand. And I was like, oh sorry I'm a very direct person, how are you. So I'm still working on the being polite thing.

The thing is over the years when I was growing up I could distinctly tell who was faking it and they irritated me. I can tell when someone is being false and making conversation for the sake of making conversation and i can't stand it. I'd rather talk about something interesting.

I was telling one of my friends about how difficult I find it to connect with people and she asked my why I dont' just fake it. And i can't. I don't have the energy. I don't see the point. I'd rather spend time with people I really can talk to than try and push a connection with an NT who doesn't get me. Which may be selfish, but from time to time I do meet kindred spirits and it's so much more enjoyable to converse with them than to fake it in the blind hope I may connect with someone I don't really like.