Are you aloof?

Post Reply New Topic

How responsive are you to others and how often do you initiate any type of interaction?

According to my wife, I'm aloof at the wrong times.

Sometimes, I respond to people. Other times, I don't feel like responding. I got off into my room.

I'm never unresponsive, but I rarely initiate conversation except with people the handful of people whose company I enjoy, with whom it's impossible to shut me up. I sometimes visit a bookstore nearby and speak to the owner for three or four hours at a time; with other people, I speak almost solely in monosyllables.

I would say, most of the time, I "superficially" interact with people.

In one of my jobs, I have to interact with the public. It can get stressful sometimes.

On my main job, though, I spend most of my time alone. And I like that.

Sometimes respond

Rarely inititate

Do not mean to be unapproachable

But homophobia

Cost benefit analysis

Previous precious lil "friends" almost all dumped me

"Hurt" a lot. For a long time

They were not worth the effort they required


No risk, no reward. No punishment either








Adrenal fatigue


f**k mister redelings

Thus far, it appears, to me, that in social interaction, the best case scenario is , whooptie do

The worst case scenario is, subject to imagination


For example, if someone wants to be my friend, we hang out. Talk. Eat. Whatever. Helps me one teaspoon for one hour


When we argue, I obsess over it, easily five years. Every f*****g day. Personally insulted and offended.


Analyze their every word and action


I am 35 and it is just not worth it

I always respond politely to people who talk to me and always smile and say thank you to cashiers in shops.
I didn't always, but when I was in my 20's, a nice cashier told me I should.
I had to practice smiling because it was hard to do.

But people have said I'm timid, even when I think I'm being confident.
I don't have friends except for family when they visit.
Being alone seems natural to me. I rarely initiate conversation.

I am passive, not aloof. I cannot initiate conversation*, but I respond when others do**.

*I can initiate conversation with some close family members but not all of the time.

**I cannot always respond when others initiate either.

_________________
31st of July, 2013
Diagnosed: Autism Spectrum Disorder, Auditory-Verbal Processing Speed Disorder, and Visual-Motor Processing Speed Disorder.

Weak Emerging Social Communicator (The Social Thinking-­Social Communication Profile by Michelle Garcia Winner, Pamela Crooke and Stephanie Madrigal)

"I am silently correcting your grammar."

By default I am non-interactive. If I acquire new knowledge on a special interest, or encounter a person who lacks knowledge on said interest, I will monologue. I rarely desire a response.

In more formal settings I have a small talk script. When I run out of lines I'm doomed.

People have often told me I seem aloof, but I'm really not.

When I was younger I had trouble carrying on conversations with people I didn't know well. Now I can converse fluently with most people, but I still don't initiate conversations.

I've always kept to myself & been in my own world so Yes I am aloof.

I’ve been called “aloof” my entire life. Even as a child because I literally had no idea how to interact with other children. As an adult I never reach out to other people “just to be social.” There usually has to be some other reason, or at least a common interest.

I'm sometimes unresponsive, it drives my bf crazy. I don't generally initiate conversation but I can if I'm genuinely interested in something, which is rare. People think I'm aloof, I think I'm aloof too.