Worst or Weirdest Piece(s) of Advice You’ve Been Given

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Being my complete self held me back. The bad part of me hampered my progress in social situations and prevented me from having a fuller life. I am doing well now, but anxiety is starting to get the better of me again.

I wish someone had told me to “be myself.” I think I needed to hear that.

It feels good to hear it at first but the people who told me weren't exactly the accepting, open-minded type so i don't trust them. I think they wanted to think of themselves as open-minded though!

Is funny. Someone says "Be yourself" so you do and then they say "No, go back to as you were!" Hahah!

Nobody knows who they are separate from the external environment

It's insulting when precious lil "people" have the nerve to tell me that you don't know who you are


who I am is much less practical, than who the speaker is


Crossdressing? Homophobia, bathrooms

Don't even get me started on, autism




Provocative

Triggering


The world is biased in favor of, neurotypical extroverts

Numerous jobs require "outgoing"

Restaurant retail sales

Introverts don't have many jobs

Outside STEM and trades









How about survival of the fittest


Skinny smart handsome cisgender neurotypical white men have competitive advantage at work and relationships


Racism sexism homophobia fatophobia classism lookism ableism


Some things are subtle

Like idiots have the nerve to make fun of the way I walk




Autistic gait




You could claim ableism , but there is no law that, says they have to master the Diagnosic statistical manual

"Just be yourself" is a platitude which does not offer any useful information, understanding or "model" of how to go about changing your thinking or, more specifically, how to relate to the world and yourself in a different way emotionally.

I particularly dislike any advice which contains the word "just". Use of this word indicates that it is being assumed that the advice is easy and obvious when, in fact, if it were easy and obvious, such advice would never be necessary. Such advice is what you get when your problem is making the other person feel uncomfortable, and they simply wish you would shut up and go away.

Very often it is not advice we need, but an alternative role model.

The worst practical advice I received was from a teacher who told me, "You're not clever enough to go to university. You should get an apprenticeship." I ignored him.

Because advice is given does not mean it has to followed. We are responsible for our own thinking.

"be true to yourself"

Racist sexist homophobic arrogant entitled judgmental impatient precious lil "people", "be true to yourself"




Way too many precious lil "people" are "true to yourself" and that (I believe) is one of the largest problems in the world

Hahahaa so true

I guess my experience was different.

I was constantly led to believe that who I was wasn’t good enough. Being unapologetically me at this point in my life feels great.

If someone doesn’t like it, tough!

Ah no i agree with you there, not hiding myself and what others see as weakness does feel great for me too! You shouldn't constantly hide your true self for other people's convenience. Your own happiness and Comfort is most important.
What i mean is i just don't believe in those People's (nt people's) sincerity when they say things like that!

All advice from my dad:

When I was 12 and sitting in the corner drawing (which I did a lot)
"Stop sitting there doing that rubbish... get out and play some football"

Also:
"Cheer up"
"Smile"

And my favourite:
"You need some fire in your belly"
Of course, I took that literally and didn't understand. I do get reflux occasionally, though.

Another one from people in general:
"If I were you I would..."
My reply... "If you were me you would do what I do, because you'd be me"

And:
"Do you want some advice?"
My reply... "No!"

Oh yeah! Those are particularly poignant ones.

Reminded me of something the guy behind a bar said to me when I was young: "Serve yourself!":)

Suit yourself.... What if you don't want to wear one?

"Cheer up" and "Smile" can be irritating. I remember an older man from Toastmasters years ago who started every conversation not with "Hello," but with, "Smile, the world's not coming to an end." He made me feel very uncomfortable because he stood too close to me.

I don’t like being told those things, either. I mask enough without someone telling me to do it more.

I was told to smile frequently when I was younger. I’d be thinking about something very interesting, and a phrase like this (usually uttered by a guy) would jolt me back to reality.

Then he’d say something about how seeing women smile made him happy.

Then I’d naturally smile because I’d say something really snarky in my head.