Should governments criminalise shaming of singles/virgins?

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Perhaps I am rare for the Asperger's stereotype here (?), but I am a moderate drinker. 100% of the meetups that I attend are in bars. I used to drink more heavily when I was a student and in my early 20s, but that was probably just a habit that I picked up from living in the UK. Even so, up to now I drink at least every couple of days. I have a Mediterranean diet (and life outlook), which means several glasses of wine with dinner, or if not, after dinner. Probably something that I am used to being part Spanish. I do not mind at all being around social settings in alcohol, what bothers me more is being around judgemental neurotypicals.

The difference is that when I attended socials during my studies in the UK, a lot of times they took place in quiet bars or quieter pubs. Or at least they were chosen for times when not many people were there except us in the social, such as a Wednesday night. This avoided a lot of the rowdy people, who usually were present on Friday and Saturday nights, or during a big football game. I preferred this system a lot more. Imagine just 30 members of your own social group in a pub, and just perhaps 5 or 6 other clients hanging around talking in the pub since it is a workday night. Very low noise level.

Over here the meetups tend to be in loud bars, the type that where sometimes the music and ambience gets so loud that even if you shout during conversation, the other person cannot hear you.

Last night it was at a moderately loud bar. But low turnout, which meant less noise. The low turnout was probably due to it being Christmas season.

Meetups do tend to be in bars. At least the ones I've been to have been - like all of them. The reason for this is pretty simple - there's no where else for that many people to get together. People don't often have a big enough house for everyone. And where else are you going to go? These Meetups are organized usually by one person - so they just have them somewhere that a lot of people can go to.

You can always ask the host to maybe plan a meet somewhere more quiet. You might make a suggestion if you know of a place that can house a lot of people.

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In 2017, I actually tried making my own Facebook group meetup. The meetup.com fee was $15 per month for an official group, and I could not afford that, so I made a Facebook meetup. I invited people from a foreign language meetup. Eventually turnout became so bad that it dwindled to about 2-3 attendees, then only myself. I ended up attending my own meetup alone, and then cancelled it. That was quite depressing.

If I had the money, I would pay the meetup.com monthly fee to have an official group.

I still can’t believe that Aspies in meetups would ask about your sex life.

Something is not right about this.

These questions might be pertinent if these meetups were orgies.

She knows that already.

And it’s good that you haven’t given up.

Her last post directly to me was telling me to give up wanting a girlfriend. It would ease my mind if she acknowledged that I don’t want to do that. I just wish I could figure out where to start and actually feel like things are changing for me.

I am supportive of that.

How about specifying your wish and making it into a plan?

A plan of happiness for you and for her.

In countries like USA, which take free speech to an extreme, I doubt that this happens. At least, bullying and shaming single/virgin people seems to be quite common in USA.

Neither am I giving up. I have been through so much sh*t with this dating stuff, but I never gave up.

My low point was between ages 23-25 when I fell deep into a depressive state from being single. I ruminated about it so much that I lost my appetite, came close to straight up vomiting on several occasions, plus lost around a third of my entire body weight from 80 kg (178 lb) to 55 kg (120 lb) from being unable to eat properly. But still, I never gave up.