I think I might have ASD

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I identify male, but I was born and raised female. Whenever I bring up the idea that I might have autisum, people list the typically maly symptoms and say "you don't seem to have any of those".

However, I've been reading a lot, and the symptoms for females are different, and there are lesser known symptoms I seem to have.

I wanted to list some of them and as if any of you have the same or thinks I should bother getting tested.

I started talking and reading really early. I read that delayed speech is a symptom, but that speaking too soon might also be.

I didn't have eyecontact with people until I was 16 and people starting telling me I was being rude. I worked on it for a long time, and although it still makes me uncomfortable, I now manage to maintain a normal level of eyecontact. (Although I've been told my eyes tend to linger, borderline staring)

I've never been good at knowing what to do in social situations, and I learned most of what I know by copying others.
I've always been the odd kid. Never followed fashions or norms, and never really been able to self-correct or figure out what I did wrong or why it was wrong.

For a very long time I was very uncomfortable with any kind of physical contact. If I was tired or depressed or overwhelmed, I couldn't even stand people standing too close to me.
I still only really like being touched by people I really trust, like hugging my mother.

I tend to get sensory overload. Being in a noisy place makes me extremely tired, and loud noises or smells or strong lights will make me very uncomfortable.

I used to have meltdowns from stress and sensory overloads.
I got an ADHD diagnosis, but it was later retracted.

I have specific interests. I read that while guys with ASD typically fixate on things like trains or collector's items, women fixate more on people. I do that. I find a person I latch onto and forget everything about myself. Partner, best friend, etc.
Also musicians. I fixate on them for extended periods, listening to all their materials and almost obsessively learn everything about them


Now, here's why it gets tricky.
I got a schizophrenia diagnosis at 21 (I'm 30 now), and I did raise concerns about autism but the shrink said the symptoms kind of overlap so I shouldn't worry.

However, I can't let go of the notion that this is more than just schizophrenia.

Does anyone else have have similar symptoms or experiences?
Do you know if it's enough to warrant a diagnosis or at least an assessment?

Also I tend to stim. I do this thing where I tap my fingers against each other in a certain rhythm, and if things get to be too much I rock.

OK - welcome here!

_________________
I am as I am. Life has to be an adventure!

Hi, Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Yes, on the face of things, you certainly sound like you have spectrum traits.

First off, please don’t go cold turkey on any medication. Although it sounds like you have doubts about the schizophrenia diagnosis from almost a decade ago, so probably aren’t taking medication at this time.

* difficulty with eye contact, then when you try borderline staring.

* hard time self correcting

* very choosy about physical contact

* not liking loud noises or smells

* meltdowns

* stimming

All of these sound like classic ‘spectrum’ traits. I don’t know about talking too soon. And with you feeling in your heart that you’re male, but being raised female, this might explain a big chunk of not fitting in, although being on the spectrum may explain much of the rest.

And I think focusing on a partner or best friend is more functional than what I sometimes do, which is really focusing on the autobiography of a stranger. Although sounds like you do that also by focusing in on musicians.

And please have medium expectations about psychologists and/or therapists.

Some are pretty good, but some aren’t. In fact, some are downright lousy. And a lot are merely so-so. For example, a lot of therapists focus a lot on social issues, but not sensory issues. And I think it’s because their approach to the autism spectrum is from the outside looking in, rather than the inner life of the person.

And even when a person gets a diagnosis, other than school and college, there are not a lot of resources to really tap into. Although at times I think WrongPlanet is the beginnings of what a community might be.

Thank you for the replies. I guess all I can do is jump into it

You’re welcome, and best of luck!

And please feel free to use us as a resource whenever you like.

While these aren't diagnostic tools, you may find taking some of these quizzes to be helpful:
https://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=113459