Did you ever wonder about your obsessions??

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Since I only found out about my Aspieness (or at least the name for it) a little more than a year ago, I have been thinking back on my obsessions through my life.

I can remember in high school when I was maybe 15 or 16 and I took a look at myself and wondered in utter knowledgelessness WHY I have these ongoing obsessions. I am glad I have an answer now because then it was only "I can't help myself" with no other reason attached.

Has anyone found this similar (especially for those who didn't discover the name for their Aspieness until adulthood)???

I always wondered why I got so obsessed with stuff. Like when I was little, I was interested in this, then that, then, well, you get the idea. Now that I'm older, my obsessions and interests have narrowed into specific categories, although from time to time I pick up another obsession/interest.

Even though I found out about AS two years ago I only recently learned about the obsessions. Even up to a year ago I was almost embarassed by some of my obsessions. I very seldom let others see how deep my obsessions go but from time to time my best friend would see my obsessions. She never said anything negitive but I could sometimes see the obsession mirrored in her reactions and I realized that not everyone got obsessed with things to the level I do.

Y

I used to wonder why I have such obsessions, before I found out about my AS at 15. I've also wondered why they were so frowned upon. I just accept my Obsessions now and I don't hide them from anybody. I refuse to hide my Obsessions.

I don't really hide my obsessions I just try to not talk about them too much. I have learned that no one wants to know as much about the subject as I want to tell them.

Y

Although I realized that my obsessions weren't "normal" before I was diagnosed with AS, I ddin't really think about them per se. But when I got my diagnosis, I thought, "Oh yeah!"

That's my case.

In fact during primary school, I didn't really suffered from my obsessions. Of course I was feeling weird but, despite family difficulties, sometimes I could really enjoy life because there were so many fascinating things to focus on such as plankton, then fossils, then versification, and so on. I couldn't understand other children and especially girls being interested in such minor things as clothes or dolls.
Maybe my obsessions were my only safe places.

Later at secondary school I tried to hide my obsessions because I desperately wanted to be integrated which was a challenge: I was looking very young for my age, was younger than other pupils in my classroom, was very immature for my age, people were not used to me as in my village. The worst time of my life. I did want to be like others, and obviously I was beginning to realize I would never be like them and couldn't understand why.

Now I am 43 and I realize that my obsessive nature could help me achieving things I was not supposed to do. So I don't want anymore to change myself; I just would like to master my behaviors a bit more.

alexandra

I felt very bad about my obsessions before I was dxed. Not about the depthe of my interest, but because I felt bad that I couldn't stick to any interest for more than a few months. Some would come and go, but very rarely has an obsession of mine ever lasted more than a few months.

I used to be obsessed with rocks, and whenever I found a rock I liked on the ground, I would put it into my coat pocket. Then pretty soon I had my own little rock collection in my coat; my mom wasn't too happy because my coat was extremely heavy, and it was brutal to try to wash it due to taking all the rocks out and putting them back in. That was when I was in second and third grade (9-10 years old), and that obsession lasted for a couple years. That was probably one of the obsessions I had that brings back some good memories, and it's one of my weirder obsessions (rock hounding is still a little fun for me now, but I don't collect rocks like I used to anymore, you know, by putting them in my coat pockets).

Yeah, I have been thinking back about my obsessions lately. I've only learned about Asperger's in the past few months (actually I think I first heard about it a few years ago, but the descriptions I found did not quite fit me). I am not diagnosed, but I definitely have obsessions. Now that I've been looking into Asperger's, I feel less like a wierdo since at least there are others with the same thing.

Though, I am questioning my Aspieness because I can't recall having obsessions in my early childhood, unless you count reading which I could do sometime before kindergarten. Most of my obsessions began around eleven or twelve, a bad time in my life, as my mom was going through some issues, and I believe I became extremely depressed. Also, I'm sure hormones were just starting to kick-in. Does anyone know, can extreme circumstances make such things more pronounced?

Aimee

I forgot to add to my previous response, that although I have obsessions, I generally don't talk too much about them. Part of that is because I mostly talk to my husband, who will tell me I'm babbling if I talk too much on a subject. And I am pretty shy, so don't generally talk to stranger's/co-workers etc. about these subjects. My parent's live across the country so I don't talk about my obsessions too much with them, though I've found my mom doesn't seem to mind my "babbling."

Aimee

I got diagnosed at an early age....no need to wonder

When I was a child, I didn't think of my obsessions as....well....obsessions. I just considered them as things that I really really loved with intensity. The only one that's bothered me was an obsession I had with my pastor that started when I was 13. I used to think about him constantly, was always trying to find ways to be around him and any contact I could get made me elated.

This lasted until my mid-twenties and in hind-sight, the fact that I my mother and I were never close, my step-father rejected me and my father, after years of being a dead-beat dad, kicked me out his house the one time he let me live with him, made me seek out someone who would love me. Even though my pastor ignored me and treated me like crap, that didn't stop me from trying to win his love.

I didn't find out why I carried out such neurotic behavior until I found out I had AS. I still have other obsessions like decorating, religion........and message forums but at least I know it's just the way my brain is wired and I can enjoy them without feeling guilty.

Last edited by nirrti_rachelle on 05 Sep 2005, 8:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I never wondered about my obsessions. I was always obsessed with events in history, certain books, certain movies, or certain musicals. They weren't things that were really, really weird. I just thought I was an obsessive sort of person.

That post made me want to jump off my chair galumph around I didn't know anybody else collected rocks, although in my case I was very picky (I only liked quartz stones) so my pockets didn't get so full.

That was before I realised that collecting knowledge and understanding is much more fun and useful than collecting objects. Looking back I'd say a number of my 'interests' were a waste of time, although no more so than watching TV, which most people do.

I should probably mention that if aspies are people with a 'dash of autism', I seem to be a geek with a 'dash of aspergers', or possibly just a weird NT, so (specifically UnicornGirl), don't take anything I write as typical of an aspie...

Yep. No one had ever pointed out to me that I may have AS. I only heard of it when I happened to come across the Wikipedia article (cross-referenced from something else), but the descriptions of it made perfect sense, and I tested pretty highly on the non-diagnostic tests. Before, I was pretty obsessed with things, but the degree of obsession in my interests would fluctuate before I found a new one. I don't know if this is an AS thing or simply an ADD trait, but I would focus insnaely on each interest before I was done with it. I was just never interested in school, so I wasn't a particularly good student. I usually fooled people into thinking I was smarter than I was, given my ability to talk about my interests so articulately. I can still do this. And sometimes, I wonder if my only REAL talent is spreading my enthusiasm for particular subjects and making it seem as if I really know more than what I'm talking about. I guess that might make me a good teacher, but I loathe the thought.