Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Does anyone feel left behind?

Page 3 of 3 [ 47 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3

Previous topic | Next topic

FadetoBlack
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 7 Feb 2020
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 21
Location: England

16 Aug 2020, 9:55 am

I can really relate to this.

My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough.

I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports.

Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted.

Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia.

For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.



Romofan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2020
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 581
Location: Carcosa, Texas

16 Aug 2020, 10:06 am

(Sung to the tune of “Garden Party“ )

Brilliant!

Rick Nelson deserves Tribute!


_________________
"We see the extent to which our pursuit of pleasure has been limited in large part by a vocabulary foisted upon us"


Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,412
Location: Outter Quadrant

16 Aug 2020, 12:34 pm

FadetoBlack wrote:
I can really relate to this.

My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough.

I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports.

Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted.

Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia.

For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.


Congradulations , not all Aspies make to that age ., Am living proof of this
according to number of good doctors . Hope your doc take the diagnosis of autism into Consideration with his diagnosis of Schizophrenia .


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,502
Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 Aug 2020, 6:49 pm

FadetoBlack wrote:
I can really relate to this. My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough. I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports. Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted. Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia. For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.

when i was a kid the school shrink wrappers also dx'ed me [depending on the shrink] as schizoid or schizotypal. didn't get the AS dx until my early 40s. my reaction to the latter was "life goes on until god calls me home." i am partial to the "holland" analogy, it is soothing and consoling to me.



blooiejagwa
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 19 Dec 2017
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,793

16 Aug 2020, 6:57 pm

auntblabby wrote:
FadetoBlack wrote:
I can really relate to this. My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough. I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports. Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted. Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia. For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.

when i was a kid the school shrink wrappers also dx'ed me [depending on the shrink] as schizoid or schizotypal. didn't get the AS dx until my early 40s. my reaction to the latter was "life goes on until god calls me home." i am partial to the "holland" analogy, it is soothing and consoling to me.


when we were learning these terms and people were giving presentations, i got a horrible feeling (when the kids who had to present schizoid were doing so) that this all described me, from an outsider's POV, exactly.
had no idea about Aspergers or that i could even be considered to be on it..


worst fear is non-verbal child developing schizophrenia too in addition to the already manifested ASD...
how on earth do people in that situation have any relief/hope/outlet/peace?? i mean even a tiny bit?


_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,502
Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 Aug 2020, 7:00 pm

when heaven comes, that then is the peace. until then we're stuck in this hellworld [per the hindus of old] for the duration however long it may be.



blooiejagwa
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 19 Dec 2017
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,793

16 Aug 2020, 7:14 pm

below is irrelevant to discussion so hidden

Show Spoiler
you have a classy, old-fashioned (not Ye Olde type ,but after) but not ostentatious, style of expressing thoughts. you would get on well with my nice brother. he writes and thinks similarly. (not just here, overall)


_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114,502
Location: the island of defective toy santas

16 Aug 2020, 7:42 pm

blooiejagwa wrote:
below is irrelevant to discussion so hidden

Show Spoiler
you have a classy, old-fashioned (not Ye Olde type ,but after) but not ostentatious, style of expressing thoughts. you would get on well with my nice brother. he writes and thinks similarly. (not just here, overall)

thank you :heart:



JustFoundHere
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 13 Jan 2018
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,152
Location: California

30 Aug 2020, 4:36 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
Personally, I've learned to remain largely indifferent.


ADDENDUM: I've learned a long time ago to avoid making comparisons; that is comparisons are subjective - hence getting stuck in "that viscous cycle of comparisons" might just be the worst thing!

In short, comparing apples and oranges yields nothing more than lemons and the pits!!



Other Julie
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 3 Apr 2020
Gender: Female
Posts: 12

31 Aug 2020, 1:42 pm

The short answer is, yeah, always. I'm not really in touch with any of my old friends anymore except in the superficial Facebook way, but they are all waaaaay more successful than I am. I've felt this way since I finished graduate school. All my friends were getting these great jobs and finding great relationships and getting married and buying houses and I was living at home with my parents again, struggling to find a full time job and alone. I hit all the milestone eventually except for kids (neither my husband and I wanted them), but I still feel behind. It seems like everyone I used to know is rich and successful, traveling all over the world and living in fantastic houses and having amazing social lives. I live in a modest middle class ranch style house and am a happily married legal secretary. I'm not exactly setting the world on fire with my accomplishments. Pre diagnosis I would really feel down about it, like a complete loser. Post diagnosis, I feel better my lack of success. I don't feel so defective anymore; it's more a feeling of what might have been if I hadn't been born this way. It helps to remind myself that I can't compare myself to NTs because that's completely unfair to me. I live with a lot of limitations that they don't. They handle things with ease that I really, really struggle with. I have to remind myself I've done pretty well all things considered.



Dear_one
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 75
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,721
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines

31 Aug 2020, 1:46 pm

^^ Your old friends are burning through more money, but are they happier, or more stressed? Social media is for bragging on, not sharing insecurities.



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,412
Location: Outter Quadrant

01 Sep 2020, 12:55 pm

Other Julie wrote:
The short answer is, yeah, always. I'm not really in touch with any of my old friends anymore except in the superficial Facebook way, but they are all waaaaay more successful than I am. I've felt this way since I finished graduate school. All my friends were getting these great jobs and finding great relationships and getting married and buying houses and I was living at home with my parents again, struggling to find a full time job and alone. I hit all the milestone eventually except for kids (neither my husband and I wanted them), but I still feel behind. It seems like everyone I used to know is rich and successful, traveling all over the world and living in fantastic houses and having amazing social lives. I live in a modest middle class ranch style house and am a happily married legal secretary. I'm not exactly setting the world on fire with my accomplishments. Pre diagnosis I would really feel down about it, like a complete loser. Post diagnosis, I feel better my lack of success. I don't feel so defective anymore; it's more a feeling of what might have been if I hadn't been born this way. It helps to remind myself that I can't compare myself to NTs because that's completely unfair to me. I live with a lot of limitations that they don't. They handle things with ease that I really, really struggle with. I have to remind myself I've done pretty well all things considered.


Success is as success does . It was a keeping up with the jones,s world , but that is not a true reality .
Quite honestly and comparatively , it sounds as if you have done quite well . Not everyone is a Justin Bieber or. Madonna, “ example” the person with one eye rules , in the kingdom of the blind people .
And if you have Autism going for you , it might be easy to see that , you may possess traits unique to you ,that you may not have realized yet, Cause being in the rat race , can cause shortsightedness. In the best of people.
Offered as a thought.


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


JustFoundHere
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 13 Jan 2018
Age: 61
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,152
Location: California

01 Sep 2020, 2:22 pm

Jakki wrote:
Other Julie wrote:
The short answer is, yeah, always. I'm not really in touch with any of my old friends anymore except in the superficial Facebook way, but they are all waaaaay more successful than I am. I've felt this way since I finished graduate school. All my friends were getting these great jobs and finding great relationships and getting married and buying houses and I was living at home with my parents again, struggling to find a full time job and alone. I hit all the milestone eventually except for kids (neither my husband and I wanted them), but I still feel behind. It seems like everyone I used to know is rich and successful, traveling all over the world and living in fantastic houses and having amazing social lives. I live in a modest middle class ranch style house and am a happily married legal secretary. I'm not exactly setting the world on fire with my accomplishments. Pre diagnosis I would really feel down about it, like a complete loser. Post diagnosis, I feel better my lack of success. I don't feel so defective anymore; it's more a feeling of what might have been if I hadn't been born this way. It helps to remind myself that I can't compare myself to NTs because that's completely unfair to me. I live with a lot of limitations that they don't. They handle things with ease that I really, really struggle with. I have to remind myself I've done pretty well all things considered.


Success is as success does . It was a keeping up with the jones,s world , but that is not a true reality .
Quite honestly and comparatively , it sounds as if you have done quite well . Not everyone is a Justin Bieber or. Madonna, “ example” the person with one eye rules , in the kingdom of the blind people .
And if you have Autism going for you , it might be easy to see that , you may possess traits unique to you ,that you may not have realized yet, Cause being in the rat race , can cause shortsightedness. In the best of people.
Offered as a thought.


Well put -- Being caught in the "rat-race" can yield short-sightedness - even in the best of people!



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,412
Location: Outter Quadrant

01 Sep 2020, 5:10 pm

auntblabby wrote:
FadetoBlack wrote:
I can really relate to this. My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough. I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports. Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted. Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia. For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.

when i was a kid the school shrink wrappers also dx'ed me [depending on the shrink] as schizoid or schizotypal. didn't get the AS dx until my early 40s. my reaction to the latter was "life goes on until god calls me home." i am partial to the "holland" analogy, it is soothing and consoling to me.


Considers stuffing corks. Into each of Auntblabby s. Ears so he may get farther down the road before he hears gawd calling , by the grace of god.


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


Pieplup
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Dec 2015
Age: 21
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 2,658
Location: Maine

01 Sep 2020, 5:18 pm

Jakki wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
FadetoBlack wrote:
I can really relate to this. My other diagnosis is Schizophrenia, and that you definitely do not tell people who don't know you well enough. I got diagnosed with ASD in May, and there has been nothing done to help with supports. Getting to 33 and then being diagnosed is a hard pill to swallow, as all the pain of the journey I have taken to this point could have been averted. Thankfully I accept it now, but really the diagnosis of Autism was more a confirmation of a suspicion of my psychologist who I saw originally for the schizophrenia. For sure, I feel really left behind. I don't think I will ever make any friends again. And I worry I am a burden on my parents sometimes.

when i was a kid the school shrink wrappers also dx'ed me [depending on the shrink] as schizoid or schizotypal. didn't get the AS dx until my early 40s. my reaction to the latter was "life goes on until god calls me home." i am partial to the "holland" analogy, it is soothing and consoling to me.


Considers stuffing corks. Into each of Auntblabby s. Ears so he may get farther down the road before he hears gawd calling , by the grace of god.

:lol: :lol: :lol:


_________________
ever changing evolving and growing
I am pieplup i have level 3 autism and a number of severe mental illnesses. I am rarely active on here anymore.
I run a discord for moderate-severely autistic people if anyone would like to join. You can also contact me on discord @Pieplup or by email at [email protected]