ASD adults and aggression - thoughts?
I am a psychologist in San Francisco specializing in working with Autistic adults. Skibum invited me to join Wrong Planet, and I am grateful for this opportunity to communicate with others who appreciate all that is unique and special about Autism. One of the things I do is write blogs about Autism in adults, and skibum alerted me to concerns about some of my writings, one, in particular, being aggression in adults with Autism. I would very much appreciate hearing from forum members with an interest in this topic and those with concerns about my articles. In particular, I welcome feedback, criticism, and suggestions that would help me communicate a more accurate understanding of what being Autism is about, including aggression and similar topics.
Although I consider myself knowledgeable about Autism, in truth I think of myself as a student, eager to learn and understand, and it is this attitude and goal that I bring to my membership in Wrong Planet.
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
I am a psychologist in San Francisco specializing in working with Autistic adults. Skibum invited me to join Wrong Planet, and I am grateful for this opportunity to communicate with others who appreciate all that is unique and special about Autism. One of the things I do is write blogs about Autism in adults, and skibum alerted me to concerns about some of my writings, one, in particular, being aggression in adults with Autism. I would very much appreciate hearing from forum members with an interest in this topic and those with concerns about my articles. In particular, I welcome feedback, criticism, and suggestions that would help me communicate a more accurate understanding of what being Autism is about, including aggression and similar topics.
Although I consider myself knowledgeable about Autism, in truth I think of myself as a student, eager to learn and understand, and it is this attitude and goal that I bring to my membership in Wrong Planet.
Thanks for joining us.
It's always better to be able to discuss with someone what was actually meant vs. how we interpret it.
Good experts should always maintain the perspective that they're still learning. Isn't that the only way to maintain one's expertise?
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
4. A known trait central to the diagnosis of Asperger’s is the presence of preoccupations and compulsions. Interruptions of these can lead to aggressive reactions, reactions that appear to the recipient of the hostility way out of proportion to the nature of the interruption itself. This is another consequence of the person’s diminished ability to recognize how hurtful and damaging such aggressive acts are.
Yes, we often have preoccupations and compulsions.
Interruptions or a change of routine might lead to stress or anxiety.
I'm not sure what "aggressive reactions" means.
I sometimes have meltdowns from sensory stress but that isn't "interruptions".
I can't think of any time I felt aggressive from an interruption of a preoccupation.
My sensory meltdowns might seem "out of proportion" but those are not from interruptions.
I don't believe I have a "diminished capacity" for recognising how I feel or how it will be perceived.
I know meltdowns won't be perceived well, but I can't stop them.
I don't believe they are hurtful or damaging to other people.
"How hurtful and damaging such aggressive acts are ...."
This really makes it sound like we are attacking people or being physically violent.
If they are confused about why I'm having a sensory meltdown, I'll gladly tell them.
My sensory meltdowns usually look like anger and impatience.
If I can't flee the stimuli, I sit on the floor / ground to decompress.
5. Finally, the odd and isolated lifestyle common to many people with Asperger’s, as a dominate cause of their aggressiveness, should not be discounted. This lifestyle often leads to the development of its own detached psychological system. That system, combining defective reasoning, reduced ability to assess social situations, and limited appreciation of other people’s point of view, creates instances where adults with Asperger’s are unable to appreciate the consequences of their actions and the impact they have on other people.
It's not my "lifestyle". It's my LIFE.
It's only "odd and isolated" to people who don't take the time to understand.
Being "odd and isolated" is certainly not the CAUSE of my aggressiveness (aka anxiety).
Being around people who judge me is the problem.
I don't have a detached "psychological system".
In my mind, all things are connected through synthesis.
I'm aware of everything: I'm immersed in everything all at once.
I might detach from people, but that doesn't mean I don't understand them.
"Defective reasoning" -- OUCH.
"Limited appreciation of other people's POV" --- I've addressed this already.
^ I'm very, very aware of other people's POV even though I can't always express it.
"Unable to appreciate the consequences of their actions".
^ What actions/ consequences? We can't learn? We can't see cause and effect?
Also there is a strong connotation that the "consequences" are always negative.
"The impact they have on other people"
I still don't understand what this means and why the focus is on their feelings.
What about the positive impact we have?
What about the negative impact they have on us, and their accountability?
Such a diminished capacity, in turn, affects control of one’s actions, creating a sequence of cause and effect wherein insensitivity to aggressiveness reduces one’s control over aggressiveness, in turn further reducing that person’s ability to understand the effects of that aggression.
More of the same sentiments.
_________________
I never give you my number, I only give you my situation.
Beatles
The only time I have ever acted aggressively towards anyone was in self-defence, when the other person thought that it might be "funny" to gaslight, patronise or in some other fashion demean me. I don't tolerate bad behaviour, from anyone, and others shouldn't expect me to put up with abuse.
Good for you my friend!! Yes, none of that is acceptable; even if it's just microaggressions or passive-aggressive reactions - especially the gaslighting part. The thing is, if we speak up against the gaslighting e.g. "Why do you insist on invalidating my experience? What could possibly be gained from that?" they are likely to either double down and respond with a flippant remark like "well, I don't know - it just seems like a lot of this is all in your head, it's how you perceive things" (which is equivalent to saying "you're mentally ill, so you're not competent to judge how someone treated you badly, because you can't read people's faces / motives / thoughts" OR they may express more contrition, however half-heartedly, that they "didn't really mean it that way".
i can say for myself i usually only get aggressive on the defense. I get into "fight or flight" because i can't process the information fast enough for the offensive person. And people use that against me a lot. that's why i can really give someone a piece of my mind in an email or text haha. in person i'm flustered, often muted, and will lash out just to escape. that's a great question. i think people would resonate with me, but surely there's other reasons like sheer frustration and people's lack of consideration.
CockneyRebel
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Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
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Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love
I just got a call from the doctor who wrote the article. He apologizes for not being here more. He is extremely busy but he will be coming as often as he can. He told me that he is redoing his website and removing the word Asperger's and changing it to ASD to be in accordance with the most recent DSM. I will let him know as well that some people still use the word Asperger's in their identities so he should make them feel welcomed also. He also plans to rewrite the article that started this thread and he is very grateful for everyone's input. He wants to rewrite the article to better reflect how we feel as a community. Just thought you all would like an update.
_________________
"I'm bad and that's good. I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me."
Wreck It Ralph
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