Have you ever wished you could suppress your sex drive?

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Mw99
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21 Oct 2007, 6:04 pm

Wouldn't it be advantageous if we could somehow shut down our attraction for people of the opposite sex? If I didn't feel attracted to women, then getting rejected and ignored by women and not being able to get what I am programmed to want to get wouldn't be a source of suffering in my life. And to those of you with NT-traits reading this: no, I don't want to be gay! I'd be happy being asexual and feeling no attraction whatsoever for any man or woman.



Tim_Tex
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21 Oct 2007, 6:07 pm

Never wished it.

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Sapphix
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21 Oct 2007, 6:14 pm

I think the real question is not whether you want to suppress your sex drive (please don't do that) but how you find a partner to share it with. Might be helpful to start by removing the blanket label of "a woman" as the solution. Start to see us as individuals. Unique people. If you are ready to see the individual person, and not her sexuality, you may well attract a romantic partner, with whom sex becomes a side-effect of your interest in her, not the goal. Remember. Paradox.



crackedpleasures
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21 Oct 2007, 6:14 pm

Having erotophobia (I feel contaminated by sexual attraction) I have tried to suppress my interest in women for a long time. I now try to slowly accept it's there and to allow myself to feel the attraction. However, sometimes when my OCD is at its heaviest, I still wish I could just press a button to switch off libido.


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pbcoll
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21 Oct 2007, 6:17 pm

Sapphix wrote:
I think the real question is not whether you want to suppress your sex drive (please don't do that) but how you find a partner to share it with. Might be helpful to start by removing the blanket label of "a woman" as the solution. Start to see us as individuals. Unique people. If you are ready to see the individual person, and not her sexuality, you may well attract a romantic partner, with whom sex becomes a side-effect of your interest in her, not the goal. Remember. Paradox.


What if you can't find a partner? What if your social skills are such that no woman will take you? The only reason why I haven't looked more into castration is that i don't want the side effects such as weight gain. My sex drive is only a source of frustration for me.



Sapphix
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21 Oct 2007, 6:21 pm

pbcoll wrote:
What if you can't find a partner? What if your social skills are such that no woman will take you? The only reason why I haven't looked more into castration is that i don't want the side effects such as weight gain. My sex drive is only a source of frustration for me.


If you are interested in individual people, individual people will be interested in you too. Has nothing to do with your skills in a group situation, in my opinion.



pbcoll
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21 Oct 2007, 6:34 pm

Sapphix wrote:
pbcoll wrote:
What if you can't find a partner? What if your social skills are such that no woman will take you? The only reason why I haven't looked more into castration is that i don't want the side effects such as weight gain. My sex drive is only a source of frustration for me.


If you are interested in individual people, individual people will be interested in you too. Has nothing to do with your skills in a group situation, in my opinion.


It doesn't work for me (i become interested in individual girls, but they don't take interest in me), hence I don't want to be interested. it's not just my social skills in a group that are useless, it's also one-on-one.



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21 Oct 2007, 6:37 pm

crackedpleasures wrote:
However, sometimes when my OCD is at its heaviest, I still wish I could just press a button to switch off libido.


So do I. I don't have the foggiest idea of how to date safely, and how to tell if a guy is going to be right for me. Libido only makes me more likely to let down my guard, and this fills me with anxiety.


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crackedpleasures
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21 Oct 2007, 6:42 pm

hartzofspace wrote:
crackedpleasures wrote:
However, sometimes when my OCD is at its heaviest, I still wish I could just press a button to switch off libido.


So do I. I don't have the foggiest idea of how to date safely, and how to tell if a guy is going to be right for me. Libido only makes me more likely to let down my guard, and this fills me with anxiety.


I just consider sexual desire as a sort of animal thing, like it soils us humans who developped a brain but still go back to practising these primitive ways of fun. Mind you this is my OCD speaking so I am well aware that my ideas are wrong. That is why, instead of suppressing my interest in girls, I try to slowly accept the interest is there and learn myself how to deal with it.


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Sapphix
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21 Oct 2007, 6:45 pm

pbcoll wrote:
It doesn't work for me (i become interested in individual girls, but they don't take interest in me), hence I don't want to be interested. it's not just my social skills in a group that are useless, it's also one-on-one.


Imagine/visualise a partner and write down, in detail, what they think, what they say to you, what they like and dislike, their funny quirks and mannerisms. Write as much detail as you can, avoiding physical characteristics, if possible. Don't share with us - its for you. Just practice letting a person into your life, even if only on paper, for now.



pbcoll
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21 Oct 2007, 6:53 pm

Sapphix wrote:
pbcoll wrote:
It doesn't work for me (i become interested in individual girls, but they don't take interest in me), hence I don't want to be interested. it's not just my social skills in a group that are useless, it's also one-on-one.


Imagine/visualise a partner and write down, in detail, what they think, what they say to you, what they like and dislike, their funny quirks and mannerisms. Write as much detail as you can, avoiding physical characteristics, if possible. Don't share with us - its for you. Just practice letting a person into your life, even if only on paper, for now.


I've let people into my life before. the results do not encourage me to do it again. Thanks anyway.



Mw99
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21 Oct 2007, 6:54 pm

crackedpleasures wrote:
hartzofspace wrote:
crackedpleasures wrote:
However, sometimes when my OCD is at its heaviest, I still wish I could just press a button to switch off libido.


So do I. I don't have the foggiest idea of how to date safely, and how to tell if a guy is going to be right for me. Libido only makes me more likely to let down my guard, and this fills me with anxiety.


I just consider sexual desire as a sort of animal thing, like it soils us humans who developped a brain but still go back to practising these primitive ways of fun. Mind you this is my OCD speaking so I am well aware that my ideas are wrong.


Why do you think your idea is wrong? It makes perfect sense to me.

It's not like the human race would eventually cease to exist if everyone thought like us. In the interest of raising kids and preserving the species, people would still procreate.



Last edited by Mw99 on 21 Oct 2007, 7:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

richardbenson
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21 Oct 2007, 6:59 pm

no way! this means i am in love with being horny :D


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21 Oct 2007, 7:41 pm

I like my "animal things." They are a lot cleaner than the idea that humans have that having a mind means that we should reject our bodies and our sexualities.



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21 Oct 2007, 7:46 pm

Sex is not foremost on my mind. I would have to improve myself greatly to get to the place where I could get married. I don't think there is much of a market for someone like me, anyway. I am very ordinary looking at best, with plain brown hair, short (5'1"), somewhat overweight at present (134 pounds) and a "crazy cat lady" with an odd Roger Bannister obsession. I am 43 years old with suspected AS and a seizure disorder.

Though optimistic about most areas of my life, I don't see myself being successful in the areas of love, marriage and sex.



bigizz
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21 Oct 2007, 7:59 pm

I was annoyed the other night I am filled with desire to have sex with women yet have no natural ability to convince one to do that with me. So I can see where your coming from but I don't yearn to be asexual, that would be sort of boring and unhuman. I'd rather just figure out how to convince a woman to have sex with me.