Eye contact - I think I scare people

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I am trying to sell my artwork at shows. This requires that I interact with people. Good luck with that.

So far I have done REALLY poorly, even though the other artists tell me my work is really good. So I'm beginning to think it's me that's putting people off. I have started watching people as they walk by my display and seeing their reactions. One thing I noticed is that when I make eye contact, most often they INSTANTLY look away. I think part of this is that in the environment of a show, they want to avoid pressure to buy. But it seems like the reaction is more negative. I'm thinking I'm too intense or something and I actually put people off. The initial contact with a customer is critical and I'm thinking I'm at a distinct disadvantage.

There is something about me that screams 'freak' - run away ...

I'd certainly ask your friend the special ed teacher about this.

And maybe try lightly tinted glasses-- or even fake clear ones. Some people with eye contact issues do find them helpful.

I actually thought about this. But I don't want to be too aggressive about autism. I really don't want to have that be the cornerstone of the friendship.



I wear glasses. I thought about taking them off.

In a market, when people look at things to buy, they often get a pitch, and they often say no. With time they might feel uncomfortable saying no all the time. They might understand your look as a "So... DO YOU BUY IT OR NOT?"

You can do two things to avoid your natural behavior of looking at them:
- If you really sit or stand for hours, it's not easy to find a really convenient thing to fix, try to have a book or a news paper, and when somebody comes, look at them, say hello cordially with a smile.
- Look at what they are looking at, talk about the art without insisting on the sale, rather explain how you did it.
- Smile! when you look at them

LOL. Then they WILL run away.

My smile is REALLY forced and tentative if it isn't actually connected to one of my interests.

I think the tinted glasses is a good idea, or sunglasses, if you're right about being too intense.

This is the kind of situation where I would be tempted to do the wrong thing lol go to people and ask them why they look away ... probably not a good idea

Shadi

I don't think this is about autism: I would just ask her if she has any tips that would help you make more sales. If you trust her taste, she's a natural.

And do try taking your glasses of-- this used to help me a lot when I was in plays.


And SuperApsie's advice is great.

lol

But isn't your artwork one of your interests? Can you find a genuine way to smile about people showing interest in it? Maybe when not interacting with people you should try to make or plan some art-- might make you give off positive vibes?

I wonder about this as well. Once I launch into talking about the artwork, then I dominate the conversation. It's like Cyclops in X-Men. When I talk about the art I off the special glasses and now the full force of my gaze is unleashed, raking the world in uncontrollable emanations ...

God do I know this feeling. Watch the special interest ray destroy all human empathy.

But worth working on.

Is any of your art online? I'd like to see some.

I have had both teachers and the police accuse me of lying because I would not make eye contact with them.

One time I was walking to the store and a cop saw me stagger when walking so assumed I was either drunk or drugs so he pulled me over. The cop shined a light in my eyes to see if I was on drugs and of course I having Aspergers did my best to avoid eye contact. This pissed him off so he told me to move the front of the vehicle I was not moving fast enough for him mostly due to his flashing lights so he used his car to to push me back by kicking it open. He then got out of his car in an aggressive manner then grabbed me by the upper bicep thats when I said I am autistic I have Aspergers then he let me go then explained to me that he need to see my pupils. He let me stare in the air above him so he could watch my pupils dialate. He asked me I was staggering so I told him my high blood pressure medicine makes me dizzy. He then said be carefull and drove off.

You're lucky you didn't get tased!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RH5tHj7WJM8[/youtube]

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wow you are very talented!

Thank you.

Now if I could just solve the interacting with people thing.