Showing affection!

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2 years ago i saw my father cuddling my 16 year old brother on the sofa in the downstairs room as i was walking past. my mother was sitting next to my dad and bro on the couch. I was disturbed by seeing that becuase that was the first time i saw my father show affection to my brother in that way well at least from what i can remember.

It would make me absolutely cringe showing that kind of affection towards my parents and i would hate it. I mean sure that is the type of thing i did with my father when i was say 10 years old. Is it normal for people with AS too feel this way towards showing affection towards there paretns when it comes to hugs and cuddles? I remember a few years ago i was sitting in the downstairs room my father was sitting on the sofa opposite me and he opened up his arms said "Come here james" gesturing that he wanted to cuddle me but i just looked at him weirdly and said "No". On the subject of me showing affection to my parents my father said to my mother once "Its okay he just does not understand".

I have just never felt that type of connection with my parents. My brother sometmes out of the blue comes into my room to hug and cuddle me but i hate every moment of it and do not enjoy it at all.

I'm not keen on that sort of thing either. I tolerate the occasional hug from my parents, just to please them but I'm not comfortable with it.

I also hate being kissed/hugged/touched etc by people I hardly know. I mean, what's wrong with a simple hi?

I don't mind being cuddled or hugged by other people just not my parents becuase it feels awkward and embarresing.

I even hate saying or being told things like "thank you" or "I love you." As I have stated in previous threads, I like to keep my distance from people, both physically and metaphorically speaking.

With my parents I feel exactly the same way, but with a potential lover I would cuddle all day long.

Why do some young people feel the need to cuddle there parents a lot?

I like cuddling and touching, and how I'll react so seeing it depends on my mood. One caveat, if I'm not used to a person touching me, I sometimes jump a little before I relax. Maybe I don't notice the signs that a touch is coming, I don't know, but people have gotten the wrong impression from that little jump.

I love being touched and hugged by hot girl acquaintances but can't stand contact with guys.

I also have major problems expressing affection and even accepting affection. Lately I feel so disconnected emotionally. I keep blaming the medication I'm on but its also probably depression, anxiety, insomnia and asperges. *********** ** ** * ** ** * ** ****** I'll stop ranting now.

I don't like it either. I hate being touched in any way, and cuddling just seems gross. Yuk yuk. >_<

Some of my online NT friends get surprised and offended when they find out I wouldn't hug them if we met, or touch them at all. I don't really understand why it offends them..

Hm, I've suddenly started thinking about crowded places with everyone moving quickly and brushing past each other without caring who they touch. Nightmare.

I don't like being touched, hugged, or cuddled in any way. Not even from members of my immediate family. Annoys me to no end when someone wants to touch me, even if they brush up against me on accident. Yes, it's socially strange to reject shows of affection from NT's, but I don't know how to say, "don't touch me" without coming across as weird.

I'm very affectionate with my boyfriend, but I recoil in disgust at the thought of giving affection to anybody else. I'll only accept hugs for the sake of seeming polite...

I used to snuggle up to Dad when I was very young.......Mum wasn't so keen because she had a lot of issues and was usually angry with us all, though I vaguely remember enjoying a hug from her. Once I because a teenager I didn't want to hug them any more, or show them any direct affection. I put that down to a rift that grew between us during my childhood, but I'm not sure. When Dad reached for affection it somehow felt unseemly, and he seemed to pick that up, and stopped holding out his arms.......I felt guilty about that but not guilty enough to reinstate anything. My sister still hugs me when we meet, I allow it but somehow I feel quite awkward about that and kind of wish she wouldn't, though I'd probably not feel good if she stopped.

I went through a phase where I lived among a load of bohemians, hippies and anarchists, and they were all very touchy-feely.......I really enjoyed that, but then they were mostly very special people, quite unlike the trash I'd found in the mainstream world.

These days it's just a few women I show affection to.....and there's always something unconventional about them, so I guess they remind me of the old days. I've often noticed that a lot of my Aspie traits seem to vanish when I'm with the right company, and this is the most noticeable example I have of that - you'd never believe it was the same guy. Whatever it is, it's not based on objective trust - frankly I don't particularly trust some of the women I'm affectionate to - but it seems like there's a deep sense of trust on an emotional level somehow, and I've no idea where it comes from or why it attaches itself so specifically to particular individuals but not to others.

I don’t mind ‘routine’ hugging, i.e. when I visit my sister, but hate ‘random’ hugging. It feels like glomping without the running jump.

Gee...I dunno what to SAY since we don't have the VOMIT emoticon (lol)! Maybe or

My father was real touchy-feely; I am not. I'm not even comfortable hugging other family members. The only place I can be anything CLOSE to resembling affectionate is at Twelve Step meetings since the local meeting of the Fellowship I'm a part of do the hug thing. I could get on fine without it, though. But I just look at it like a secret handshake thing. Other people don't know why we do what we do, but we know. OTOH, I tend not to hug people from the meetings outside of meetings. Fortunately, most OTHER people from there don't do it, either.

WHEW!