Anyone here ashamed of being autistic?

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i am..... my family keeps pushing me to be normal, for example my uncle said "people your age are bank managers"

im 23 btw, he has no clue what autism is, i have nothing to say to that, what am i going to tell him, "im ret*d, cant do that" that is all he would understand, and i dont look that autistic so i really dont know what to do with my family.

They said autistic people dont know they are autistic. That was their proof that im not autistic.

I work in fastfood so im looked at as a big loser, everyone else has really good jobs in my family, and are really social and stuff. My mom is an aspie, and everyone dosent really talk to her, she always wants to be in isolation, and she herself said aspergers is a fake disorder made up by doctors.

Ignore that post that will probably get deleted and the account banned.

I get the same thing from my family. They think I can just walk in and get a job, leave the nest and live on my own. But it's not that easy.
I wouldn't survive long in a fast food place too.

I just ignore them and spend time on my interests. I'm not really sure what else there is to do.

They have no right to treat you that way.

And you shouldn't have to be ashamed of being autistic. They should be ashamed of themselves for being total jerks. They are, of course, wrong about autistic people not knowing they're autistic. A few don't, but that's more likely to be because their parents decided not to tell them than that they wouldn't understand. Even those who haven't learned to understand language yet, or never will, may understand they're different. We are a lot more perceptive than they give us credit for; your family seems utterly clueless about what autism is.

You're working in fast food. In my opinion, that is one of the toughest jobs in the world--physically demanding, emotionally exhausting, and one of the least prestigious jobs out there. I'd like to see the average bank manager last an hour in that environment. To keep a fast food job for any length of time, you have to be either trying not to starve or downright badass. And considering your family would probably feed you even if you were unemployed... well. Kudos. Seriously, I couldn't do that.

Hey at least you have a job!
I'd kill for a job dude!

Stop listening to your family, they don't know what they're talking about. Be proud that you're different!

There's an attitude in the NT world that says "Autism is something to be ashamed of". Since it's usually bound up with the one that says "Autism isn't discussable", it's pretty hard to shift.

We need to be speaking out against that attitude, because it's ignorance that is something to be ashamed of. We need to shift the viewpoint towards one where adult autistics who don't know they are have an incentive to realise the truth. Where adult NTs who are prejudiced against autism realise what's really going on and do something about it. Where this world is one in which we can find our place.

A family should support you whatever your special interests are, and try to find ways how you could find a job that is prestigious enough to satisfy both them and you, be it connected with your special interests or not. In other words, if they can not or want not to help you with your job/profession, they should not utter a wrong word about it, not to mention scolding you.

If they would help but you find you're not able to live up to their expectations, I would say it's ok, they only have to learn to accept it. It takes time.

I'm not sure I would say that I am ashamed but I certainly do not wear the label proudly. I have some unique strengths and insights due to my AS. I also have a lot more issues as well.

Hence the thread on misanthropes.

Sometimes it's hard not to hate humanity. Sometimes for the little things, sometimes for the big things.

I'm not ashamed to be on the spectrum.

Yes I am! Very, very, very ashamed. Everyone keeps on expecting more out of me, and I find it so hard to just be an Autistic person in today's society. It's like society won't let me be an Aspie or anything. It's so hard living in a world built for NTs. Because it isn't built for Aspies. Everywhere you go is loud, and people just think everybody loves loud noises or don't mind. Well, not everywhere you go, but most places. People are always making a loud stupid noise, like shouting, banging about, letting their brats wail, revving loud motobikes/car engines, and so on. There's no escape.

But that's not only it. I'm so ashamed of having AS. I think it stems back from when I started school - how awful I was. I started off in life as a typical baby and toddler, then as soon as I started school at 4 years old, all my Aspie traits all came out at once, and from then on they were trying to look for a diagnosis, which was then discovered in me at 8 years old. Then I felt all embarrassed, and one of my classmates knew (because she had an Autistic brother), and she went and told all the other girls in the class about my disability, then they all started speaking to me like I was a baby, and then they seemed very afraid of me and so didn't want to be friends with me and felt embarrassed of being friends with me. It was awful. Although I was lucky enough not to get bullied, I still felt very left-out and friendless. Best friends came and went - one minute I was best friends with another girl, the next minute I was lonely again. And I felt so ashamed, and the shame still hasn't gone. This is my only life I will ever have, and I am lumbered with this cruel disability. And all the symptoms fill me with shame: the meltdowns, the stupid obsessions, the social mistakes I make, the way I look stupid even without acting stupid, the sensory issues making me frightened to go out because of sudden noise, and anxiety....it's all horrible, and it all stands in the way of me settling down in a job. It's so unfair. Then people wonder why I'm ashamed. And to cap it all off - I'm not very bright either. I have a few little talents, but they are just what most people can do, and I don't thank my AS for them. There's nothing good about it - I hate having it. It's so embarrassing - especially the meltdowns. When I have a meltdown, I look similar to an NT having a nervous breakdown. When something gets right up my arse (not literally), I shout manically AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE, so loud that I get a raspy throat and a splitting headache and a rapid heart-rate afterwards, then the next door neighbours hear all this and try protecting their children because they think there's a mental nutter living in this house. Now, if that isn't shame, what is? Tell me - what is?!

I'm an Aspie & proud!

My family knows I'm on the spectrum, yet they refuse
to believe ASDs exist.

They love to play mind games with me just because they can.
If I told them to stop, they'll just keep doing it and I'll be
under threat of homelessness.

My mom and my sister both believe I'm the only one
in Portland with AS. f**k both their sexist attitudes.

I don't think I'm ashamed about being an Aspie but I do feel bad because I have more problems than most people because of it. My parents often tell me how they were married, had me & were living completely independent from their parents by the time they were my age. They are NOT saying that to be mean; they are doing it because they are trying to encourage me to be more independent because they are tired of me being dependent on em & they are worried about what will happen to me when they die. I interpret it as being mean & expecting things out of me that I can not deliver.
Perhaps it's a similar thing with you OP. Maybe your family does not understand autism & think you are using the label as an excuse to avoid betting yourself like mine assume. BTW I think working in fast-food is a very challenging job for an autistic to have; you should be quite proud of yourself. I know I could not handle that

I'm not ashamed. I'm frustrated. The worst is the people who think they understand it and so totally don't. And yea having people telling you what they were doing at your age. I mean come on, do they not realize we would if we could? I really don't thing anyone wants to spend 20+ hours a week trying to recover from being out in the world and trying to act normal. And getting fused at for things you don't even realize you shouldn't have done. That is the worst. But your family just sounds like they don't get it and they don't care or want to. One thing AS teaches you very quickly is that you have to let things go. Like what kids say when someone calls them name: "I'm rubber, your glue whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you." We have to pretend to be rubber and not dwell on what people say. Doing so will drive us all mad.

I used to be, but now I realize that it is a part of me and everyone is different.