What do you not understand about the neurotypical world?

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gyaspie
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27 Mar 2012, 4:41 am

what do you not understand and just can't understand about the neurotypical world and neurotypical people around you? please share :D



Joe90
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27 Mar 2012, 4:56 am

The fact that other strangers judge you if you don't appear to be following any of the conformity rules and if you look different in any way.
I really wish other people wouldn't interfere in why somebody else is wearing scruffy clothes or is walking with a funny posture. I just wish people could try to be more empathetic about it. ''Oh that man might be looking scruffy because he could have lost his job and so can't afford new clothes''. ''Oh that lady might have had a back injury and so can't walk up straight''. That's what I always think of other people who appear out-of-the-ordinary-but-not-harming-anyone. I don't immediately go thinking, ''oh he/she's weird, get he/she away from me!''
For Christ sake, grow up, people - they won't bite!

So the only thing that I don't understand about NT conformity is the fact that they turn public places into an ''I'm better than you'' contest, whereas I see it as a ''a place where most people have not got the choice to be so you will obviously get all sorts''.

Me and my mum was walking in the street before, and we saw this girl over the road who was really walking funny because she had a short skirt on and boots with extremely high heels what she looked very uncomfortable in, and my mum made a huge fuss. She laughed and said, ''oh look how that girl is walking! Oh, look!'' and she kept on stopping to stare, and I said, ''Mum - don't stare! Don't worry about what she's doing, you don't know her!''


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27 Mar 2012, 5:46 am

I don't understand why it's considered so important to constantly socialise. There are so many people at my college who can't bear to spend even one day not doing something social with a group of people. And when I admit that I don't enjoy socialising that much, people feel sorry for me even though it's not something that makes me unhappy.



gyaspie
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27 Mar 2012, 5:50 am

ok.... :)



MikaNeko
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27 Mar 2012, 6:48 am

I dont know why looks matter so much to them, why everyone is supposed to "look" a certain way or face being stared at/bullied. I also dont understand why I have to always say something back to people, or why I am branded a liar because I can never look anyone in the eyes. :roll:


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27 Mar 2012, 7:54 am

I agree with another poster. NTs seem to have an addiction to constantly socializing, and can't comprehend that some people may not care for being social to that great an extent. They also can't comprehend that being non social may not bother us. They automatically assume we are unhappy being non social, and will try to "bring us out of our shell", not realizing, and not being able to understand that too much socializing is what bothers us.

I am an introvert, and am fine with that. I really, really don't care to socialize much, even on a casual basis. Unfortunately, my NT father is an extrovert, and is convinced that I am miserable because I am an introvert. He also believes that if not "fixed" it will develop into a form of mental illness. I am in my early 50s and have told him many, many times over the many years of my life that I am fine being an introvert, and he still doesn't believe me. AAAAAHHHHH!! !! ! :roll: Fortunately, I live alone, so I can be introverted in peace most of the time. :D


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27 Mar 2012, 8:25 am

I cannot understand why they cannot understand that I enjoy studying and that it is not stressful in and of itself for me. What is stressful though is them insisting that my studies must be stressing me out and that I should give it up. Then when I get stressed with them over that they blame my studies for stressing me.

IT'S NOT THE STUDYING!! !! !! It's people not understanding that's frustrating me and making me feel miserable.

I really want people to go away and leave me alone in peace and quiet with my books right now!



Mummy_of_Peanut
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27 Mar 2012, 8:29 am

It's the sheep thing I don't get. I'm a mountain goat, so is my husband and my daughter. I have a couple of friends like that too. But most people I meet are sheep (whilst still trying to outdo everyone else :roll: ). What I mean is they are all the same and want to be that way. I don't want to be the same as everyone, I just don't see the point in it.


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27 Mar 2012, 8:43 am

The constant proliferation of double standards. Why it is okay for one person to treat another person badly, but it is not okay for the other person to defend themself or stand up to the bullying. Why you can have two people in the same household do exactly the same thing, but one of those people needs to be stopped and corrected and the other continues unchecked.

Also, I do not really get why the need for gender roles and especially why they need to assigned so strictly on the basis of anatomy. It is profoundly confusing to me why more people do not see this as arbitrary. This dogmatism causes a lot of people unnecessary harm.



Kiseki
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27 Mar 2012, 9:22 am

My #1 issue with the NT world, which I will never understand, is why people stop being themselves due to societal pressure.


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27 Mar 2012, 9:40 am

Kiseki wrote:
My #1 issue with the NT world, which I will never understand, is why people stop being themselves due to societal pressure.


If you answer "They don't" it raises some really interesting questions about identity.



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27 Mar 2012, 9:42 am

fraac wrote:
Kiseki wrote:
My #1 issue with the NT world, which I will never understand, is why people stop being themselves due to societal pressure.


If you answer "They don't" it raises some really interesting questions about identity.


Sorry? What do you mean?


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fraac
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27 Mar 2012, 9:48 am

If you say they don't stop being themselves. If they see themselves as consistent and whole. (Which they do, except for when they fracture during breakdowns, so it's worth continuing the thought experiment.) I think you would conclude that their subjective identity is fundamentally different than yours. I think their seat of consciousness is in a completely different place - though I'm not certain what I mean by that.



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27 Mar 2012, 9:48 am

I think fraac said that people do not stop being themselves.



BassMan_720
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27 Mar 2012, 9:49 am

I hate the subtle rules, which keep changing depending on which way the wind is blowing, that we are expected to obey faultlessly, even though the weathervane is broken.



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27 Mar 2012, 10:01 am

fraac wrote:
If you say they don't stop being themselves. If they see themselves as consistent and whole. (Which they do, except for when they fracture during breakdowns, so it's worth continuing the thought experiment.) I think you would conclude that their subjective identity is fundamentally different than yours. I think their seat of consciousness is in a completely different place - though I'm not certain what I mean by that.




Gradually and unconsciously, people are assimilated into the role and are in essence a holographic part of that particular segment of society. A part of that synergy. They emote themselves to the pact.