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FishStickNick
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21 Jun 2013, 12:47 am

Do you ever catch yourself studying other people? I find that I do this a lot. If I'm with a group of people, for example, I might not pay any attention to whatever the conversation is, and instead I'll find myself studying others--their facial expressions, their facial features, the shirt they might be wearing, their hair, and so on. Studying of facial expressions isn't so much to try and read what the other person might be thinking, but instead is more like, "that person sure wrinkles their forehead a lot." I have to be careful not to stare; I have gotten caught staring before.



rebbieh
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21 Jun 2013, 2:15 am

Yes. Not only people though. I "study" the world around me a lot (probably more than people). I see it, think about it, look for patterns etc. I often think of myself as an observer.



DeannaTroi
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21 Jun 2013, 2:43 am

I do too. I constantly study and analyze and try to understand the motivations behind the actions, sadly usually not very successful. I can not even follow the conversation when it is a larger group of people, so short of walking out studying them is all I can do... And I got caught staring more than once too... While I am really good finding patterns in nature and numbers I usually can't find them in people and their behavior.



Jabberwokky
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21 Jun 2013, 2:53 am

oh yes, the old 'aspie stare'.


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drewski56
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21 Jun 2013, 3:04 am

rebbieh wrote:
Yes. Not only people though. I "study" the world around me a lot (probably more than people). I see it, think about it, look for patterns etc. I often think of myself as an observer.


Agreed. I tend to see the people around me as just more pieces of the world around me, same as animals, cars, plants or buildings.

As far as people specifically though, I will tend to analyze to the point where I will think "oh their eyes are really close together." And then I can't unsee it. Most people tend to end up looking pretty odd to me...



IdleHands
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21 Jun 2013, 6:31 am

Yes, this is my version of the NT relationship.

Them: "Ugh, did you here a word I said?"

Me: "Yes, I heard all of them" and listened to none of them.



Soham
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21 Jun 2013, 6:43 am

rebbieh wrote:
Yes. Not only people though. I "study" the world around me a lot (probably more than people). I see it, think about it, look for patterns etc. I often think of myself as an observer.



I am the same way...I've always been an observer, mostly of nature and numbers/patterns. I've become better at picking up on patterns/behaviors of people as I get older, though still not great at reacting to or interacting with.

I may appear disconnected/aloof at times, but I'm far more aware of subtleties/nuances and patterns/connections in things that most people seem oblivious too...so in a sense, more connected than most just not in a verbal/social aspect.






And in response to the first post of the thread..."Do you ever catch yourself studying other people?" . Yes, I do. One of the several reasons I don't make eye contact, and if so it's very brief. I can hear what the person is saying much better if I look around or stare at something neutral while they're talking. If I look at someones face/eyes I stop hearing what they're saying and start to analyze their expressions or other individual aspects, or just become overwhelmed at all of what's coming at me and "freeze up"/stop hearing what they're saying. It's like I can only process so much, or one channel of information at once, not all of it.



MjrMajorMajor
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21 Jun 2013, 6:54 am

All the time. Physical features, body language, dialog, and irrelevant info are all absorbed in a piecemeal, random manner. It's not as bad if I'm not actively involved, and I enjoy observing social exchanges from a little distance. It's almost like a theater performance(with a hopefully discreet audience).



dancingwater
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21 Jun 2013, 8:18 am

I also study people all the time, staring at the intricate details of their faces and clothes, their conversation sort of seeps through.
I find peoples eyes fascinating, this is not eye contact just staring, sometimes scary.
This makes me hyper critical of my own appearance.
I like staring at people but hate people staring at me!

It also makes me a great artist, drawing is based in observation I go for details and texture,
Writing stories is also based in observation I get overwhelmed by the level of detail I feel I have to write,
So get creative!!



charlottez
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21 Jun 2013, 8:25 am

All. The. Time.

Quote:
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 3:53 am Post subject:
oh yes, the old 'aspie stare'.


Oh, is that what that is? Ooops.



syndragon
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21 Jun 2013, 11:27 am

i study the world and people and make up situations on my mind all the time, even when im trying to sleep these makedup stuff doesnt leave me alone disturbing my sleep.i make up stories and arguments/situations 24/7. even while im writing this im thinking hows gonna be my next hours at work. and im trying to figure out all the possibilities and how im gonna react to each one.
i dunno why is that
someone?


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Joe90
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21 Jun 2013, 12:12 pm

I do observe all human behaviour, whether they're NTs, Aspies, Down Syndromes, and other different neurologies. But since I am around NT people a lot more than people of other neurotypes, I tend to know more about NT behaviour than I do my own neurogroup. I don't think I ''study'' as much because I can pick up on NT behaviour very quick, and also define what someone's personality type is real quick too, as though it is instinct that sets in. But I do observe, plus being good at picking up non-verbal social cues is also helpful. This is why when a thread is asked ''is this an Aspie thing?'' on WP, and the question is practically asking about some typical human behaviour what maybe a person with ASD is curious about due to not picking up on general NT behaviour as much as I do, I normally have to state my answer. It is partly because I like to say ''don't worry, it is not only an Aspie thing, nor are you alone - it is common in all humans.'' Other behaviours that sound Aspie-ish or sound unique are understandable to be curious about. So in short, I am not oblivious to people and the social world.

When I was a child (after I was diagnosed), I observed behaviour of the other children all the time. In fact I think I studied them too much, which may have got the intense feelings of jealousy started up, because I seem to have grown into a very jealous person as an adult. I don't get jealous of other people's looks or wealth. I get jealous of how much confidence they have and what their social status is compared to mine. I then find myself going over my limits just to keep up with others, because I fear being on low social standing point. I wish I didn't care what others are doing or thinking and was just self-absorbed. But I'm not. Might be from being an average intellect, I don't know.


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Jabberwokky
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21 Jun 2013, 4:16 pm

charlottez wrote:
All. The. Time.

Quote:
Posted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 3:53 am Post subject:
oh yes, the old 'aspie stare'.


Oh, is that what that is? Ooops.


Yes it is. Aspies will have different things that set them off into 'lala-land' but ultimately its all basically what is known as 'aspie stare'. I think what distinguishes the aspie stare from regular staring is a combination of facial expression (that is commonly not adjusted to social context), sudden and unannounced switching off/out of the conscious mind and into some other autistic mental state and the aspie concerned is not aware they are staring. The intensity of the underlying mental state and the resulting intensity of the stare is disconcerting (apparently) to NTs.

In my case, I switch off mid-conversation and I don't know I have done it till afterwards. I hate meetings mainly because I know I can't handle multi-party verbal interchanges for more than a few minutes and then I start aspie staring etc. Its all very troubling. I have three days of all-day meetings in two weeks time and am dreading it.


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KingdomOfRats
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21 Jun 2013, 4:38 pm

aspies are fierce people watchers,am guessing its because those of us on the spectrum are not born with the natural ability to develop various skills,in many peoples cases that comes from having to study others.

am not a people starer/watcher as they all look the same mould to self, and have never been able to visualy track environment,in own case this is a severe autism issue,we tend to pick up things through independant development,visual prompts like PECS/symbols and repetitive support from humans to get it into rote memory, not through copying/mimicking others as this is a big difficulty for many of us.


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ASS-P
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21 Jun 2013, 5:26 pm

...Yes .



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21 Jun 2013, 6:59 pm

I typically study the environment more than other people, that, or I'm so focused on my inner thoughts that I don't notice anything at all. Recently I've been trying to study people in the hope of picking up a few Sherlockian tricks, but it's hard because whenever I watch them, they stare back!


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