Do you have problems socializing with family?

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I notice basic gatherings such as a BBQ,Thanksgiving or Birthday Party I'm itching to get away from the dinner table back to my video game or the safety/security of my room. My immediate local family for gatherings isn't super large. Just Me,Mom,Dad,3 Sisters,nephew,brother-in law so 7 other people are here for most gatherings I've mention. My grandmother visited which she NEVER does since the family had a falling out over something I said to her years ago. Dad was mad OMG! you didn't come see your Nanny etc. but I feel if you CHOOSE not to be a part of our immediate family gatherings birthdays going places (we've asked her time and again have offered) yet she refuses. I feel why bother with the issue and I chose to stay in my room occupied with studying for FINALS.

We had Thanksgiving plus a Birthday Party for the 12yr. old this weekend so a very gathering together type weekend. Maybe too much for me mentally and I don't know it? I don't know. Does anyone else get this feeling? Thanks.

I miss my family; but spending the holidays alone with my wife is far preferable to all of the drama of coping with drunks, drug dealers, and manic-depressives.

... not to mention that any negative behavior on their part is all MY fault ... just ask them ...

I used to have an issue with family gatherings as well, mostly because I didn't get along with my mom and dad at the time. I experienced nothing but boring conversations that I never paid any attention to or understood.

Even now that I'm older, I still feel a little intimidated when my parents invite many relatives at once, mainly because I always think that they would expect something out of me.

For me it depended on the family.
I have some second cousins on my mom's side I actually really like, as well as my mom and my half brothers.
At family gatherings with my dad's family I had a tendency as a child to hide and play video games or something, anything besides being in a room with a large amount of my relatives.
I'd grab my food when it was served and then go hide again.

I haven't really seen much of my family for many years.
I've been far away from all of them, plane tickets aren't cheap, and the economy hasn't been that great the past half a decade or so.
That's ok, I suppose.

I love my family, but I only call them once in a blue moon (we live thousands of miles away from anyone) and when I'm at large family gatherings, I tend to go off in a corner or the side of the room to get away from the bulk of the people. They're good people, but I get overwhelmed and anxious being in the middle of everyone. I'd much rather sit off to the side with a book (as an "escape" option if I don't want to participate in conversation).

I've gotten a lot better than when I was a kid-- I used to go up a floor or two (or down to the basement) and read by myself. I wouldn't even stop and say hi in the living room first. I think it's part of the reason that my family isn't a huge fan of me compared to the other kids in my generation.

I have no issues with my husband and daughter, though! I love spending most of my time with them

There's only a few family members of mine I can actually have comfortable conversations with. The rest, I'm just extremely awkward around.

Outside of my parents, brother and one of my sisters, I have trouble socializing with all of my other family members. I come from a very large family; I have two older sisters, one younger brother, 7 nieces and nephews, countless aunts, uncles and cousins, and 1 living grandparent (my Nana). Family get-togethers always happen at our house, always during the summer (though not every year, thankfully).

When it does happen, I try to find a place to sit amidst the chaos while smiling politely and trying to make conversation. I try to fight the urge to flee for as long as possible, but inevitably I always "burn out" and need to "recharge" in my own room, playing on my computer for a couple of hours before I quietly make my reappearance and attempt to socialize once more.

Thankfully, all of my family members understand my need to "recharge", and can even recognize signs that I am beginning to burn out. Then they'll will ask me if I need to go to my room. I am really lucky to have an understanding family.

As I have tried to explain to my dad before, it has nothing to do with loving or not loving my family members; I love all of them to varying degrees. For example, I am bad with children and have no idea how I am supposed to act around them or react to them, and all of my nieces and nephews are rather stand-offish towards me as a result. But I still love them more than life itself and would do anything for them, and I get a similar emotional high from talking about them as I do from talking about a special interest. I also have immense guilt for not being the very best aunt that I could be.

I manage OK around my immediate family; none of us are especially social, so idle chit-chat is largely nonexistent. Larger family gatherings are a bit more difficult, in which cases I normally stick with my sisters or my mom, thus avoiding having to talk to people. In either case, I usually need to hide somewhere quiet after a while.

Surprisingly I don't. They are family and they all accept me and it's my husband that has to tell me when I am doing something wrong when he thinks it's that big of deal like when I started talking about bodily functions at the table during Thanksgiving and asking if someone pooped their diaper or farted when I smelled poo. I don't have contact with other family members outside my immediate family except my aunt and uncle sometimes and my brother's common wife. My other brother lives all the way in Montana and I got along fine with his girlfriend. I do have some other family members on my Facebook but I don't talk to them on there. I am not a very sociable person on Facebook so I don't like things often or make lot of comments or post often in groups.

I have psychosomatic seizures, muscle tics, etc because of my parents. the extent to which this has to do with being queer and raised by homophobes vs being an aspie raised by people who tried exorcisms 10 years before therapy remains to be seen...

but yeah. biiiig trouble with my family. not in the same way as other people, but still huge. I'm honestly not sure if I'm going to maintain a relationship after I'm financially independent.

I always dread family gatherings even to this day. as a child I would always find a quiet spot away from everyone. I love my family dearly even with all the flaws. but I know it can be incredibly difficult to endure the guilt and feeling like you have let people you love down. when I was roughly 8 or 9 my nana died and I refused to go to the funeral which caused a rift in my families perception of me. don't lose hope I am only coming to terms with the reality of my diagnosis now. try reading a lot of books to try and learn ways of coping its something I am only doing now and have found it very helpful

If I'm very into a game at that point, then I can recognize being eager to get back to it.


But I do generally enjoy spending time with my family. I'm not usually itching to get away.

I can be more awkward around less immediate relatives but it's not like I'm against being with them or would rather avoid them. Not at all.

Thankfully, we're not close in my family. I have nephews and nieces that are 10-20 years old that I've never met. Where my siblings live I don't have a clue. Therefore, I'm spared the torture of any BBQ's or other nonsense that families get into.

When I was younger, I felt me and my family were tight as a pack of wolves; I would have begged, stolen, lied, fought, killed, and died for any of them.
Ever since my late-teens/early-twenties, however, I've increasingly grown estranged from most of them, and my development as a social semi-hermit means that there's a lot of points that I have difficulty relating to with my cousins. It's easier for me now to have a conversation with like-minded acquaintances and co-workers, than with the blood of my blood.

My parents and sisters are all I have. My cousins and other relatives are pretty much strangers. I don't even remember their faces. I would refuse to go to any gathering with my cousins etc if there were any.

Sometimes I wish that my relatives would read through threads like this and try to guess which posts are mine ...