Are you finding yourself scared of people

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abdi2
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20 Aug 2014, 2:23 pm

do you often feel that people are so unpredictable to the point where you have a natural fear of others?

do you find yourself being submissive because of this fear.



sharkattack
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20 Aug 2014, 2:26 pm

I see your new here but I can tell you the answer is yes for me and I would say that is true for a large number of people on the spectrum.

Do you feel that way yourself OP?



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20 Aug 2014, 5:41 pm

1. No.

2. The more scared I am, the more dominant I try to be, because who wants to be under the power of someone who scares them?


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The_Gimp
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20 Aug 2014, 5:55 pm

This sounds exactly like social anxiety disorder



abdi2
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20 Aug 2014, 6:06 pm

Sharkattack

i used to but i still have those behaviour however i feel like i am over them. im just wondering if this fear is more common.



dianthus
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20 Aug 2014, 8:31 pm

I'm more afraid of people than I used to be, because like you said they are unpredictable, and I feel more vulnerable as I get older. But I am not very submissive, it's more that I just want to avoid people, and avoid confrontations and difficult conversations the like. Life would probably be easier if I had the ability to be more submissive.



droppy
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21 Aug 2014, 3:45 am

Quote:
do you often feel that people are so unpredictable to the point where you have a natural fear of others?

nope, because I am more unpredictable than any of them

Quote:
do you find yourself being submissive because of this fear.

nope, I'm always very dominant



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21 Aug 2014, 6:24 am

I'm not scared of people.
I'm just very wary because I struggle with conversations.

I'm more submissive than dominant, but I think that's more tied to being introverted.


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jk1
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21 Aug 2014, 6:48 am

Yes, I am. But probably not because people are unpredictable. Throughout my life many people have been very hostile and rude to me. It's not surprising that I have become very wary of people. I feel so nervous and tense around people that I can't even talk in a relaxed manner, which often is mistaken for anger. So some people seem to be scared of me, too.



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21 Aug 2014, 11:14 am

abdi2 wrote:
do you often feel that people are so unpredictable to the point where you have a natural fear of others?

do you find yourself being submissive because of this fear.


It's literally as if you read my mind! I AM scared of other people....scared of making them mad, scared of screwing something up and driving them away somehow, scared of accidentally doing something rude (even thought that rarely happens) scared of them finding out I have AS traits, scared of them discovering I need stuffed animals to cope with life. I think a lot of this fear actually comes from my stepmother - she's the most unpredictable person I have ever known. I know she tries, and sometimes she does manage to act quite normal, and then I feel guilty for harboring what is probably an irrational fear towards her - but I just don't know what to do!! ! 8O :(

What makes this even more messed up is the fact that even though I'm scared of other people, I am actually desperate for their approval and acceptance....whether this is just part of my gentle, eager-to-please personality, or something I've internalized from being told I should prize that above all else as part of my "therapy" to become more normal, I just don't know. I do know that if it were up to me, I would limit my contact with all of humanity to as little as possible, with regular contact only from those I trust wholeheartedly, such as my dad, my aunt, and half-sisters.


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ASPartOfMe
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28 Aug 2014, 4:47 am

abdi2 wrote:
do you often feel that people are so unpredictable to the point where you have a natural fear of others?

do you find yourself being submissive because of this fear.


Story of my life.

Since my diagnosis I am less submissive.


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28 Aug 2014, 5:42 am

It'd be smart to fear people, as they're the only thing on this planet that'll hurt you in the majority of cases.



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28 Aug 2014, 8:59 am

I have a certain fear of people, because they're very unpredictable. I do my best to be assertive though, because I don't want to submit to anyone by giving them the power.


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kraftiekortie
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28 Aug 2014, 9:05 am

I was say that I'm more wary than scared of people, for the most part.

I try to get around the wariness by talking, and by acting cuckoo/rational/with attempted wit according to individual situations.

Where fear comes in: When there's a group of people whom I feel do not have the best intentions for anyone who passes their way.



olympiadis
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28 Aug 2014, 9:26 am

jk1 wrote:
Yes, I am. But probably not because people are unpredictable. Throughout my life many people have been very hostile and rude to me. It's not surprising that I have become very wary of people. I feel so nervous and tense around people that I can't even talk in a relaxed manner, which often is mistaken for anger. So some people seem to be scared of me, too.


Yes +1


Dillogic wrote:
It'd be smart to fear people, as they're the only thing on this planet that'll hurt you in the majority of cases.



+1



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28 Aug 2014, 10:46 am

I'm scared of youths and passers-by in public. I am scared of my (estranged) mum. I am scared of gangs.

But I get dominant when pseudo-doctors are involved. When a doctor messes me about, I use my medical knowledge to tell them I'm not stupid.

Pseudo-psych: well I don't know why you're on both Olanzapine and Aripiprazole. They are pretty much the same thing.
Me: well Olanzapine is a serotonin-dopamine antagonist but Aripiprazole is a dopamine and 5HT1A partial agonist. So no.

Nurse: Lorazepam is not for insomnia.
Me: yes primarily, but it has been used off-label for short term treatment of anxiety with co-morbid insomnia.

I've also spoken up for other patients on the psych ward when doctor and nurses mess them around.

Knowledge is power when it can be used.

NB: most doctors are ok.


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