Emotion and Objectivity VS Subjectivity

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Okay, another topic has bought me to raise this issue.
I am noticing that there seem to be several different kinds of aspie on here...those who remain entirely scientific, no matter what the situation and who manage to retain scientific objectivity, no matter what the situation...and those who react to disagreements with some level of emotional response...ie, anger or upset.

To my knowledge, the criteria of Aspergers does not include 'emotionally detached at all times', or does it? Empathy is a different matter altogether. I don't know, but to my knowledge, those with aspergers are known to often have emotions that are well behind their mental capabilities in terms if maturity-ie, limited number of descriptives for how they are feeling, reactions of anger to things that might usually result in sadness, jealousy etc, extreme emotional responses (meltdowns) in response to changes of routine or being challenged... So, my question is, how to you deal when someone disagrees with you, challenges you, changes your routine etc? Do you constantly view things on a scientific level, never allowing your emotions to come into it? Are you aware of your emotions? Do you believe that being Aspergers means that you view everything entirely from a scientific point of view and remain objective at all times?

I am curious about others' opinions and insight into this. ?

Well, I have emotions and can react badly to things. I try to look at things as rationally as possible but I recognize the existence of my emotions. AS means very little to me in terms of emotions other than a likelihood to act very rationalist and oddness in one's emotions, I would assign the oddness to mostly be in terms of what we connect to and such.

At times I have said I am NOT emotional. Other times, just the opposite. I'm kind of on both sides. I doubt people can survive by themselves 100% detached. as for how I react? PICK ONE! I think I have reacted EVERY way you could, even if not logically appropriate. I have gone every route from being obstinate, to stating they were right(even when they were wrong). USUALLY I at least TRY to make sure the truth wins.(If they are right, it means swallowing my pride. If I am right, it means trying to convince them.)

Steve

I am quite emotional at times but I can also flip into extremely cool and rational. I think personality type has a lot to do with how we react to things. A 'feeling' type will tend to be more emotional, thinking types maybe 'cooler' generally.

I am very competent within the logical-conceptual_scientific area. Outside that area I am lost at sea. I have emotions, but no emotional fluency with which to deal with them. Most of life is outside logic, most of life takes place outside my area of competence.

Most of life is frustrating, nonsensical, and painful. Life is killing me. I am weary of living among the chimps of emotion. I honestly do not know how much longer I can deal with chimps and their society.

I think for me, I only feel emotion where I feel appropriate, which doesn't always match what the general population think. As Starr said, personality has much to do with that I believe. I'm INTJ and that personality type is notorious for not reacting with emotion. I tend to lead out with logic and have my emotional collapse (if it's going to happen) later on after the crisis is over. I never use emotion at work because to be honest, I think it's completely inappropriate and no one will ever convince me otherwise. Whenever I see emotional displays at work I think they are wasting time and money. Really, I'm like that with most things unless it is my family, my friends or my pets.

I think the other thing with me is that I don't read people at all so sometimes they come to me with something and they feel all these emotions and think their non-verbal clues should be telling me what is going on. I end up not getting it and giving them some completely logical, pedantic answer and they become even more emotional. I won't ever become aware of that unless they basically lose it and tell me off. Then, I feel completely perplexed that they feel I didn't "care" because I tried to help them. I mean honestly, if I didn't care I wouldn't have bothered to try to help at all. I run into that constantly with feeler types with a high score in feeler. I have a high thinker score so we really are communicating on separate planes. I try to be aware of it and come across in a way I think sounds sympathetic, but it always flops and they get hurt. My personality type does not help that at all.

Now, my family, friends and husband do not get this. I think they know me after all this time and recognize my emotions and concern even if it comes out differently than theirs. Or, as they say, they come to me when they don't need someone to sympathize any longer but they need an answer they can actually use. That is usually after they have gone through all the feeler types around them to get the sympathy.

Truthfully, I would say I have intense emotion where they are concerned. It almost seems as though my emotions, though handed out sparingly actually run much deeper. But, since that's my perception, it could be completely skewed.

Thinking about it, I find I’m quite egocentric in that I usually only get emotional over things that affect ME. If it’s happening to me, I get emotional first, and logic follows later. If it happens to someone else, I become logical first, and then decide whether emotion is necessary.

I suppose this makes me look quite self-centred and apathetic.

I tend to intellectulise emotions when I am verbalising them, but I do feel them. I find that most times, I can react rationally, but if something challenges my beliefs or if something said seriously challenges me, I will react with anger. If I see someone experiencing what I have experienced, as in, being bullied or somesuch, I will sometimes react with anger through remembering what that feels like. I am an INTJ also... I have come out as that consistently for years now, but I do feel things strongly, and have strong reactions at times. But then, surely one also has to take into consideration childhood and experience, and also, any existing co morbid conditions? For example, having bi polar can make someone a lot more emotionally reactive than they might otherwise be; having hormonal issues might have the same affect... a lifetime of bullying and emotional abuse could make a person react more strongly to anything that challenges their sense of self worth...there seem to be so many variables to bear in mind, and thus, surely each and every aspie, while sharing certain traits, will respond to different things in different ways according to all those other variables?

I think you are right about all of that Graelwyn. I'm also INTJ, but I do get angry if I read about a child being abused. I think that's the judger in us. I have a pretty high score there and always have. I also think other factors come into play. Whether we are Aspie or not, personality, experience and education will all play a role in it, as will co-morbid conditions. There is no getting around that.

I know what you mean. Its hard for many people - especially if they are young like in their 20's that to know that they really know that one did nothing wrong, thinking that one does not deserves anothers irrational emotional reaction. I see myself respond rationally to that kind of thing depending on what it is at first. But if people give me more crap then they are an enormous waste of time to me..

Graelwyn, I myself know what you mean by reacting based on past experiences. I jokingly have made metaphors of my identity because I felt like cult. This is because I want to share things with people about what I learned in my life - my personal experiences. From my perception, sharing personal experiences usually looks like it doesn't mix in for some reason - It makes me feel like an alien. Its kind of like I feel like I have to play along with how they deal with things - like there has to be made up excuses to excuse everything like it is. So yeah, I also feel like a cult in front of what appears to be "irrationally" acting asperger individuals. I have to admitt that I can see this myself.

My reactions vary... though I always view every situation with what I think is a very logical approach (emphasis on "think!"). Yet sometimes I find myself very swept up in an extreme emotionality that I cannot handle properly.

I do not frequently feel emotionally detached but I do frequently feel detached from my own emotions (if that makes sense). I know the emotions are there but I cannot properly identify them, or know what I should do with them.

However, it's logical to accept that however objective you think you are being, you are in fact being wholly subjective, because the world only exists one perception at a time. At least this is what I tell myself.

I am different from some of you and more like other some of you. For some reason i cannot settle down into this discusion but here is what its liek for me. I have been in situations like this before.

Its your fault, Its not. It is. I am right, You are wrong, We have a problem. OK The problem is mine. Guilty minds like mine are forever looking for solutions ot other peoples problems. This makes me feel guilty. My guilt makes your problem my problem. What makes me guilty?My problems. I am guilty of having problems. this makes me feel guilty. I am now guilty of feeling guilty about my own guilt. Only i now have your problems to solve as well. Do you feel guilty? probably not.
I dont mean to assume anything but this is my personal view. If you cannot say how you feel then there is little hope but you dont need a large emotional vocabulary to say you are not happy with something; simple words like 'uncomfortable' will usually do aspecially with people in authority.With as*holes though it is just plain difficult. Scientific detatchment or rationality tells me to make my own plans but to tell people when i am uncomfortable, happy or something else when the situation requires it. However if I were that in touch with my emotions I wouldnt be writing in this board.

generally i appear very detached.

but when it comes to affairs of the heart i totally loose it. it has taken me almost exactly a year to get over being dumped by my fiancee.

it took a couple of years to get over being left by my husband of 17 years.

I have a tendancy to start thinking and researching and asking questions very thoroughly when confronted with a problem. Thus, it is VERY frustrating when all my efforts are met with "You're wrong. You just are. Accept it."
Anybody who tells me to accept something with no logic involved earns my hate. Such a response is so commonplace that I can predict when somebody is about to say that.
It is usually at that point that I lose my objectivity because it is an attitude that I CANNOT understand. I just get mad.

My natural state was once entirely dispassionate and logical - unless I was throwing a tantrum. Eventually, I learned that emotions are an important part, and to ride them like a whirlwind. I began to forget that again, perhaps due to too much comfort, maybe I need to rediscover the wild ride.

When it comes to reactions and decisions, or crafting an opinion, I generally try to diminish my subjective aspect as much as possible. True empathy, in the sense of feeling what another is feeling, is probably beyond me, but that does not discourage me from making an effort to understand another's subjective point of view in a more psychological way. This training has made me much more aware of emotional subtleties that would have evaded my natural attention.