Is it weird that I find transexuals interesting?
Jacoby
Veteran
Joined: 10 Dec 2007
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,284
Location: Permanently banned by power tripping mods lol this forum is trash
Head on over to the LGBT forum here if you haven't already and be interested.
_________________
Diagnosed April 14, 2016
ASD Level 1 without intellectual impairments.
RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8
Head on over to the LGBT forum here if you haven't already and be interested.
I think the one really offensive and rude thing that trans people get asked about that you should probably avoid is their genitals (people ask them all the time, like it's any of their business what's in someone else's underwear--so avoid that question). Other than that, as long as you let them know that you want to understand in a spirit of acceptance then it should be ok to ask about their experience. Just be polite and considerate like you would be asking anyone else about their life.
Head on over to the LGBT forum here if you haven't already and be interested.
I think the one really offensive and rude thing that trans people get asked about that you should probably avoid is their genitals (people ask them all the time, like it's any of their business what's in someone else's underwear--so avoid that question). Other than that, as long as you let them know that you want to understand in a spirit of acceptance then it should be ok to ask about their experience. Just be polite and considerate like you would be asking anyone else about their life.
I had to laugh when I read the response. Not because what you said was funny. It's because I would have probably asked because I'm that lacking in tact. And, probably most everyone else for that matter. So, I laugh at my ignorance. It was a good laugh. But, you gotta admit, for the non-educated, that's probably number one because it's so personal and they want to know how it works to transition.
But, good to know. Anything else to know, please let me know because what I genuinely want to know is never to be invasive. But, it can seem that way. Been told that throughout my life.
_________________
Diagnosed April 14, 2016
ASD Level 1 without intellectual impairments.
RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8
Head on over to the LGBT forum here if you haven't already and be interested.
I think the one really offensive and rude thing that trans people get asked about that you should probably avoid is their genitals (people ask them all the time, like it's any of their business what's in someone else's underwear--so avoid that question). Other than that, as long as you let them know that you want to understand in a spirit of acceptance then it should be ok to ask about their experience. Just be polite and considerate like you would be asking anyone else about their life.
I had to laugh when I read the response. Not because what you said was funny. It's because I would have probably asked because I'm that lacking in tact. And, probably most everyone else for that matter. So, I laugh at my ignorance. It was a good laugh. But, you gotta admit, for the non-educated, that's probably number one because it's so personal and they want to know how it works to transition.
But, good to know. Anything else to know, please let me know because what I genuinely want to know is never to be invasive. But, it can seem that way. Been told that throughout my life.
It's simple--when you encounter a trans person (in real life or online) and you would like to ask them about their experience but don't want to be invasive or rude, say just that: "I would like to ask you about your experience, but I don't want to be invasive or rude. Would you like to talk to me so I can understand better?" Then I would just let them lead the conversation. They will let you know what they're willing to talk about and what they're not if you ask them politely. As long as you're coming from a perspective of genuine curiosity and a desire to understand and accept, that should come across.
And -
From the other end of this, I have been notoriously unhelpful when it comes to disclosing personal information about transition to outside parties. "I am not a trans information booth," is my usual reply.
Because usually, people don't honestly and openly want to understand in a respectful way and to better educate themselves about the experiences of others. They want to squeal over the circus freak. Bottom surgery is infamous here. Asking a transperson if they have had "the chop," or "built the pole out of the hole" is not cool. If you're interested in the subject, though, asking the person for directions to reading material on this without directly asking them about the intimate nature of their own body, is respectful. So, you might ask about reliable information about vaginoplasty or phalloplasty/metoidioplasty because you want to understand, without encroaching on the person's privacy. You wouldn't ask a cis person questions about their genitals, or even think it appropriate to ask a paraplegic if they can still get an erection or how sex works for them, but trans people seem to get asked the most personal, inappropriate questions as if that's ok.
Even transpeople get worried about prying when asking others these questions, but I don't have the same reservations about others. Because I know they are asking because this may be something they are facing themselves, and are often afraid of what the surgeries involve and how that will impact their bodies and their lives. Thus I'm very open with other trans people because they need to know. They're not just asking because I'm a freak and it's bizarre and funny. Not to imply you're asking for those reasons at all, either
_________________
Alexithymia - 147 points.
Low-Verbal.
Reading material would be cool.
_________________
Diagnosed April 14, 2016
ASD Level 1 without intellectual impairments.
RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8
I was going to respond to this but C2V's latest post pretty much says everything I was going to!
I don't think it's weird to find trans people interesting, but I think it's important to remember that we're humans too, and many of us don't like people being interested in us solely because we're trans. Seconding what C2V says about asking questions without phrasing them as a direct interrogation of the person you're asking. If you're looking for information, places like youtube are a good resource as well, as lots of trans people create informational videos and vlogs for cis audiences.
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