Brought down by other people's troubles?

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BeaArthur
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22 Oct 2016, 12:00 pm

I don't consider myself overly empathic, just reasonably empathic. It seems at times that some people I have considered WrongPlanet "friends" have issues and problems so profound, that I can't continue to engage with them. Recent weeks have seen long-time forum members leave amid fanfare (and no doubt some others left quietly) and others pursue a suicide course.

Why should I stay? is the question I find myself asking.

I came here to explore issues about the role of autism in my life and family members' lives. I feel as though I have gone pretty far with that, but face diminishing returns.


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SaveFerris
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22 Oct 2016, 12:07 pm

I think as long as this forum is not affecting your health in any way , the reason to stay is to impart your knowledge on others.


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BeaArthur
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22 Oct 2016, 12:19 pm

Am I effective at that, though? It is frustrating to compose a post with a sound message and have it rejected.


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SaveFerris
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22 Oct 2016, 12:41 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
Am I effective at that, though? It is frustrating to compose a post with a sound message and have it rejected.


Just because one poster rejects your message doesnt make that message ineffective. There are thousands of members who just lurk and glean what they need. I have got invaluable information from threads that I haven't posted on. You'll never know how many people you've helped from your posts - I think it would be good if WP added a system where you could +1 a post if you found it useful.


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BeaArthur
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22 Oct 2016, 12:44 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
I think it would be good if WP added a system where you could +1 a post if you found it useful.

I agree, I have often looked for the "like" or "thumbs up" button only to remember there isn't one.


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SaveFerris
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22 Oct 2016, 1:06 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
I think it would be good if WP added a system where you could +1 a post if you found it useful.

I agree, I have often looked for the "like" or "thumbs up" button only to remember there isn't one.


+1 :lol:


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League_Girl
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22 Oct 2016, 1:16 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
I think it would be good if WP added a system where you could +1 a post if you found it useful.

I agree, I have often looked for the "like" or "thumbs up" button only to remember there isn't one.



I think those would be helpful if we had one here so that way I would know there are people here who do appreciate me and like what I say so that way I know I am not offensive to everyone. :lol:


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SaveFerris
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22 Oct 2016, 1:27 pm

League_Girl wrote:
BeaArthur wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
I think it would be good if WP added a system where you could +1 a post if you found it useful.

I agree, I have often looked for the "like" or "thumbs up" button only to remember there isn't one.



I think those would be helpful if we had one here so that way I would know there are people here who do appreciate me and like what I say so that way I know I am not offensive to everyone. :lol:


As this is an autism forum I think some might find it useful if you could rate a post with -1 and click an option in a drop down box with reason why e.g. Rude , Argumentative , Insensitive etc


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BeaArthur
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22 Oct 2016, 1:32 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
As this is an autism forum I think some might find it useful if you could rate a post with -1 and click an option in a drop down box with reason why e.g. Rude , Argumentative , Insensitive etc


Negative ratings might be more than some participants could bear.

But if we did have the -1 feature, I'd need a category for Misinformation ... or maybe Sketchy Information. I see a lot of nontruths, that I normally don't bother to challenge, but I do hope they don't mislead readers. e.g. wackadoodle claims about supplements with no scientific basis.


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SaveFerris
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22 Oct 2016, 1:41 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
As this is an autism forum I think some might find it useful if you could rate a post with -1 and click an option in a drop down box with reason why e.g. Rude , Argumentative , Insensitive etc


Negative ratings might be more than some participants could bear.

But if we did have the -1 feature, I'd need a category for Misinformation ... or maybe Sketchy Information. I see a lot of nontruths, that I normally don't bother to challenge, but I do hope they don't mislead readers. e.g. wackadoodle claims about supplements with no scientific basis.


Unfortunately I can see a downside to positive & negative ratings unless the ratings could only be seen by the poster who had there comment rated. If it were up to me I'd have a hard time deciding whether it would be useful and not have a detremental affect to the forum :roll:


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smudge
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22 Oct 2016, 2:27 pm

I wish this forum was as busy as it used to be a few years ago. You get some of the old time members on Facebook, but I just don't understand why. I hate Facebook, it's crap and you can't easily see posts from the recent past or sort through them without continuously scrolling. I'm so used to forums and chatrooms and their ordered layouts. With Reddit it feels impersonal as nobody has avatars, I don't get that. That and threads aren't that ordered there either, nobody looks at even slightly older threads.

I've always wondered how much of an audience I have here. I know I have a few who check my posts. Hmm...

I've also wondered if I've ever helped anyone indirectly. For the last couple of years I haven't really been that helpful, but I used to be and compiled long messages.


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SlowMazorati
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22 Oct 2016, 3:17 pm

Ok. I confess i am a relatively new 'lurker'. I am unsure how anything i write is or will be received. I am somewhat hesitant as my impulsiveness is sometimes careless and probably based on my own experiences or feelings. I have gleaned a lot of insight and help from reading the recent posts of those in this thread and many others. I've also looked at older posts and they are also helpful. I admit i have quietly learned about a few other members, quietly, like i used to in 'live' situations. By observation and 'listening'. Its almost completely positive. You are individual characters and truly i have learned to embrace that. I didnt like the misogyny type threads, but then i don't have to read posts from someone of that nature. Everything else i am learning from and it is currently helping me to cope with my situation. And to accept it. I hope to embrace my differences and now i see im not such an alone freak. I have to accept nobody has to respond to anything i post. Members might misunderstand my way of saying things. I may just be plainly wrong. I do believe some do read them though and some respond. I can't stop anyone leaving WP. I can't stop suicidal thoughts in others. But I admit i am here, lurking. And your posts, BeaArthur, Smudge and others in this post and elsewhere are currently helping me a lot. So a huge thanks. Sorry for long speech. I will go back to lurking now, or not. You never know...



League_Girl
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22 Oct 2016, 3:22 pm

I wonder why this forum has died down, I think it's because of the spam or too many bugs here and people just leave. I can remember ten years back if you made a post here, it wouldn't take long for it to bump to the second page because of how active it was unless people kept replying to it quick enough.


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SlowMazorati
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22 Oct 2016, 3:31 pm

Hi league girl. Is it down to us 'lurkers' not being bold enough to say much? I did become a member so im not just being a 'voyeur'. :D



BeaArthur
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22 Oct 2016, 3:40 pm

Try to put this in historical perspective. Ten years ago there was very limited sourcing on autism and especially not regarding people old enough or able enough to write on a forum. Now there is a great deal more to be read and explored, so people may not be as keen to participate here.

Also put it in perspective of the founder's life path. I'm not an expert on Alex, but it seems to me he has established himself as an autism authority and derives income from that. WP was a part of establishing his credentials, but I think he probably has less day-to-day interest in this forum compared to the myriad other things his is involved in now.


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League_Girl
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22 Oct 2016, 3:46 pm

BeaArthur wrote:
Try to put this in historical perspective. Ten years ago there was very limited sourcing on autism and especially not regarding people old enough or able enough to write on a forum. Now there is a great deal more to be read and explored, so people may not be as keen to participate here.

Also put it in perspective of the founder's life path. I'm not an expert on Alex, but it seems to me he has established himself as an autism authority and derives income from that. WP was a part of establishing his credentials, but I think he probably has less day-to-day interest in this forum compared to the myriad other things his is involved in now.


Forums like this were something new too in the early 00's. Back then all we had were message boards and groups on yahoo and MSN to post in and google. I only went on Yahoo groups and message boards. They didn't have blogs then or forums like this or social networks like myspace or Faceook. Myspace was something new in my senior year. This place opened right after I graduated high school but had no interest in it then because I was on enough websites already. I can remember when it got advertised in one of the yahoo groups I was in and I lurked here and thought it was okay but didn't want to join because it was too active and I went to enough places already and didn't want another thing on my list to go to.


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Daughter: NT, no diagnoses. Possibly OCD. Is very private about herself.