Tired of feeling guilty for not wanting to be around nts.

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I'm on the spectrum, so's my brother, two of my best friends, and one of my only friends at work.

I've been around plenty of nts and it perpetually feels like communicating in a 2nd language.

I want to speak in my first language.

I'm frustrated that when I tell people about this they assume I'm some supremacist. Not every autistic person is my friend and not every nt is my enemy. I'm simply a fan of the first language experience.

It's frustrating specifically as I've retreated from autism related groups/peoples. I live in a world of autistic people and I have no interest in leaving it. My social life isn't so much a concern, however I do wish more people, and specifically my potential future kids will get the same experience that I take for granted.

I'm frustrated because I feel like my "1st language" experience gets devalued or misunderstood.

Why feel guilty? Just avoid people who annoy you, at least as much as possible. People who don't like cats don't feel guilty about it; they just don't live with cats.

A word from Shakespeare ... “To thine own self be true”. This is your life, and you can choose to live by your own rules. Some of us choose to keep the status quo running as smoothly as possible, living in the world of people can be difficult enough. One rule of thumb that helps is to treat others, as you’d like to be treated.

There are ways of politely excusing yourself from social gatherings, and turning down offers to hang out etc. People can take it better, if you make it clear it’s nothing personal. That you’re just someone who needs alot more “me time” at the end of the day.

I remember having vague feelings of guilt when I began dis-engaging from the wider world of NTs. It doesn’t bother me anymore. As others have pointed out, becoming true to myself was and still is an amazing choice.

As long as you’re not nasty to NTs just because they’re NTs.

They can’t help being born that way; just like we can’t help being born autistic.

One can eschew the society of people without being nasty to them.

Definitely not saying you’re a “supremacist.”

Neither NTs nor autistic people are a monolithic group.

You can’t ascribe the mores and actions of a whole society to one person who happens to be a mainstream member of that society through “guilt by association.”

That’s akin to believing all Germans were Nazis during the Third Reich.

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

Outside of work/family, unless you're the kind of (usually NT) person who desperately needs a lot of friends, the older you get, the more you can be picky.

Don't write off all NTs but there's definitely a kind of NT who doesn't work well with a kind of aspie as a friend/partner.

Trouble is we're taught to be picky about partners, not friends. Mostly because that personality type can exist among some people where they need a whole lot of people. It's bad for them to be too picky, sure, but for some of us, it's definitely a case of quality over quantity. Some of us don't even need friends! (Do be polite to acquaintances and nice to family, though, but that doesn't seem like a problem in your OP)

People are people so why should it be you and Nt's should get along so awfully.

To ChiefEspatier

As long as your not hurting anyone
do what makes you happy

Personally I think most people in life eventually become more selective about who they hang out with.
I think it quite a natural progression.

Be happy!

btw Think Juliette also gives good advice here too, along with the many others.

I felt guilty when I first started talking to a lot of autistic people and realized that I liked doing so 10x more than being surrounded by NTs.

My entire life I've been told there's something "wrong" with the way I naturally think and behave, and that I don't get along with NTs because I just don't want to, so I felt guilty for not wanting to be around them as much since I felt like I wasn't putting effort into "bettering" myself and acting more like how I "should".

Now I just try to remind myself that most NT people wouldn't want to surround themselves with autistic people, and if it's acceptable for them to find it uncomfortable to be surrounded by people like us then I should find it acceptable to let myself surround myself with people who are like me and who I get along with better.

I don't feel guilty about it at all. I hang around people that I feel comfortable with.