How to cancel a special interest?

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I have several interests that are almost lifelong. And one that I'm only just now starting to think of in that way.

I'm several months off turning 57, living in a small town of 2000, on disability (ASD), haven't worked in a decade, and I can't turn off thinking about working again.

The sane thing to do would be to retire. There's little work around here, and none that would advance my situation or justify risking my benefits for.

I've considered retraining with a view to self employment, but again, with such a small customer base, we'd starve.

Maybe it's a security issue, but logically, how many of us ever felt that secure in our jobs or businesses?

There's no rational reason to keep torturing myself this way. Yet I can't seem to knock this obsession on it's head... to put it out of my misery. This is one special interest that I wish would just go away. But it's like an itch that screams to be scratched, time after time after time...

Do this thing you used to do...under the table for cash only!

The only way I can stop a special interest is to replace it with another.
Usually I morph into something tangential which is related, like a subtopic, and I go from there.

My partner went back to work last month after a decade of retirement.
He chose to upgrade his credentials and had to sit exams to recertify where he lives.
He only works M,T,W and he thought he'd love it.

Let's just say results may vary.
He might bow out after his qualifying hours are satisfied.
He's even working from home - but he's not sure if he'll continue.

Thankyou. Those are both good ideas. Part time will add to the pot without risking the benefits, and cash in hand could do the same.

Yeah, part-time's where it's at.
He didn't even consider full-time.

He didn't need the money but thought it would be good for him mentally.
He wanted to feel like he was helping others.

What he discovered is that he was already helping others, minus the schedule.

I help others. I do the scout working be and I'm their cleaner. I help others in various little ways. I quite like helping others. But I just feel powerless at helping or advancing myself, and I kinda resent that.

You do have power and you can opt for part-time if it won't hurt your benefits / pension.
It's worth a try if you're so keen?

Absolutely

You don't.

I wish I could, especially since it is harming me and probably others...

I have to stop one immediately. I'm trying to replace it with Beatles again. We'll see how that goes.

Sometimes you have to resort to something akin to "methadone treatment" to wean yourself off ...something thats become like heroin.

For example I was somewhat into Bigfoot. Read the occasional book, or watched an episode of "Finding Bigfoot". But once you get into Utube ...the algorhythmns feed stuff to you...and you can become engulfed in a topic.

Before I knew it I not only was watching excessive amounts of Bigfoot-age on Utube...it started to effect my life.
Supposedly Bigfoot creatures lay logs in X patterns on the forest floor to signal territory. So if I were driving through a forest area my eyes would start leaving the road to look for them. Not safe.

So I went to Betty Ford.

Just kidding.

What I really did was to start watching vids about Jon Binot Ramsey (the little girl beauty queen found dead in her parents home in the late Nineties). Like Bigfoot...a mystery still unsolved. That got me off Bigfoot. And then I just ...got tired of JBR as well. And got back to life.

I know someone who's really into Bigfoot and can talk for hours about it.

I never deep-dived into Ramsay because it's too gruesome, but I've done a few hundred hours of Madeleine McCann.

That story is crazy-making.

You let it pass. And you'll do it again.

You replace it.
If it's less noticable, it's with something more subtle and in the background or happened to be something you already are doing routinely and with less intensity but very much a priority still.

You ruin it.
Either by turning it into business or something you do to impress others than your own pleasure. But if this succeeds instead, you just found a perfect niche for yourself!

Or, you burn out hard enough to stop any special interests temporary.
Or be depressed enough to not have any special interests; but you may get an obsession instead or a fixation to cope with depression.


Regardless; it's not voluntary.

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But...I don't want to leave my Spongie-poo boo boo!! !

Lol

In all seriousness it is VERY hard to stop having a special interest/obsession!

Even though I have a real-life boyfriend now I still have the sexual and romantic fantasies about fictional characters

Getting married will not stop this and David respects that I have these feelings