Aspies with Borderline Personality Disorder?

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When I was reading some of the older posts and I found good amount of people with Borderline or BPD among us Aspies.I was diagnosed when I was 17 and while some people don't think I have it
I happen to think so.I'm looking to see if maybe this has anything to do with Asperger's or if it is comorbid a lot. If anyone has questions I've done a fair amount of reading on BPD so I'll try to answer them.
What does everyone think then?

I don't have it, but my ex does. It got more severe over the time we were together, but he might also have schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder. All I know is that he's been DX'd with BPD and perscribed antipsychotics. Unfortunately, his psychosis became so pervasive that I had no choice but to leave him.

Before that, it seemed that my AS and his BPD created a weird sort of balance. He was extremely reckless and emotional, while I was the opposite. He was very social, while I was very shy. But we both were eccentric outcasts, so we had a lot in common.

Honestly, it's hard for me to imagine how anyone could have AS and BPD at the same time, but that's because I'm prejudiced by my own experiences. These are some behaviors that I associate with BPD:

1) Constantly craving attention in any form
2) Expressing emotions in order to get attention
3) Impulsivity
4) Intense fear of abandonment
5) Fear of being alone, need for constant companionship
6) Self-harm, often with the goal of getting attention
7) Addiction or substance abuse

Because so many of the symptoms of BPD have to do with being social and emotional, it seems contradictory to AS, since people with AS tend to be introverted and relatively unemotional.

What is it like to have both AS and BPD? How do the traits of both fit together?

There is a female who runs a well known bpd site who has been told she has AS and not Bpd, but that undiagnosed AS and all the issues it brings can result in some of the bpd behaviours?

LINK HERE

I know a member on here said their mother has been diagnosed with both.
In the end, afterall, one is neurologocal and one is generally developed from bad experiences in childhood ? That is my belief anyway.
I see no reason they cannot co-exist, but it could and can make life very uncomfortable.
My gp has also come across females with AS being misdiagnosed as having bpd because females with AS can tend to self harm and develop anorexia and have rages as well, which are also things those with Bpd have.
There was a major thread somewhere on another forum that discussed this in depth and there is a paper or two out there on it as well, I believe.

Graelwyn, this is very interesting. Come to think of it, I think my mother might meet the criteria for both BPD and AS--it's impossible for me to say if she has one or both. Despite what I said above, I can now imagine how they both could co-exist. Having been close to a very extroverted person with BPD made me see it as almost the opposite of AS, but I realize that there must be a lot of variety in how people experience it.

I wonder if the misdiagnosis you mentioned has to do with the common idea that women are more emotional and more social. A mental health professional might assume a female patient was capable of making friends and expressing emotions and go on to focus on things that could overlap between AS and other conditions, such as BPD.

The frequent rejections and abandonments that those with AS experience, could result, in some, in bpd like behaviours when they do manage to make friends/meet a lover? Just a theory really.
I mean, it is well documented that aspergers doesn't mean not wanting friends etc, it is not being able to make friends and make emotional connections.

The thing with bpd is that they also have issues making connections and engage in a push/pull behaviour...and I have noted this in threads on the forum here... aspies also seem to get somewhat uncomfortable in instances where intimacy is involved, if you are getting my meaning.

I really think the bpd label is foolish anyway, because so many shrinks use it to shove in those they cannot fit into any other category.
I once went to some groups where there were some females with bpd, and almost all of them appeared to be awkward, quiet and introverted, which really does make you wonder.

It is something I would love to see more research on.

Might an aspie who wants companionship but lacks the social skills to maintain it come across as borderline because of this ?

It's not generally recognised in diagnostic manuals, but there are two kinds of borderlines. There's the acting-out ones that are easily recognised as over-emotional, manipulative and hysterical, and there's the acting-in, quiet ones who take their self-loathing out on themselves in private. I'm a diagnosed borderline who acts-in.

There are nine criteria for bpd, but only five have to be present for a definite diagnosis.

I fit criteria 1/3/5/7/9, and I reckon it wouldn't be too hard for anyone with aspergers who craves intimacy but lacks the social abilities to gain it to fit several of the criteria. (Cool, I just noticed I make a pattern in itself - I get all the odd criteria! That's me, an oddity)

I've seen site you linked to, when it was floating around here awhile back, and read a bunch of stuff on another site of hers. Having thought I was borderline personality (along with other more or less likely or valid possibilities) & only recently being dx'd w/Asperger's myself, I can see the connection. How one dx can appear on surface as similar to other dx, esp. in females (incl. self). I don't generally do things in order to have effect on others (don't believe I've the power to influence), am neither masochist nor sadist (don't enjoy suffering), and my actions were constantly misinterpreted-which didn't help explain me to myself in any meaningful way.

Yes-I'm as oppositional towards myself as I am towards others, but people often don't see my inner conflicts, only my outer mixed messages. Could be mistaken for bipolar due to going from one extreme of emotion to the next, but from the criteria, I really am not bipolar (nor clinically "oppositional"). Switch back & forth between intense contradictory reactions simultaneously (or alternately in rapid succession), rather than having a mild/moderate "gray" realistic reasoned response to things.

If I can't have "Z" I want "Z", if "Z" is around I'm not interested-yet it's not at all that simple or absolute, either. The present reality of anyone or anything is both more difficult & more rewarding to deal with than the theoretical idea of that person or thing, on many levels. No wonder "that which is not happening or available now" seems more appealing, whatever it is. At least now I can think of causes/reasons behind my confusion (behavior confusing to others)-do not enjoy conflict yet am rife with irreconcilable wants/needs/motivations/priorities.

Actually there are two others as well, arguably even better known online...

How to put this?

Online pseudopsychologists are a breed apart...think of it as being like the fashionistas in London, Paris and New York...

If they can't get up on the catwalk wearing something that resonates with the coming trend each season they are all washed up.

So they always try to be the first to "show" the "next big diagnosis".

M

You are thinking that the woman on the site I linked to simply got Dx'd with AS to fit in with a new in fashion label?

I cannot see it as by all accounts on here, an AS diagnosis is actually quite difficult to attain as an adult ?

I only know that she is one of the same crowd who tend to DO things like that.

Most of the time I seriously doubt if the diagnoses are formal.

People have some very strange hobbies...

M

I'm starting to think I might have BPD. Some of the behaviors seem to fit me. I'd probably be the "acting-in" type.

I have the impression that BPD could fit some undiagnosed Aspies who are depressed over feeling socially isolated - that BPD is the symptom but not the cause. I think I met some of the symptoms of BPD between 7 and 2 years ago.

Previously content with self-sufficiency I begin to feel very lonely and I thus tried for the first time to create genuine friendships, but without social skills I was rejected ... this lead to a worsening cycle of rejection and increasingly desperate (and inappropriate) attempts at creating social relationships, ... as a result I felt a paranoid of rejection, ... and for a time I felt people were organizing a campaign of shunning against me, and of course I was very depressed, had allot of self-hate and I idolized/hated a lost (superficial) friend.

One thing that happened to me (that seems different from BPD, or is it?) was strong feelings of guilt. This was perhaps the worst aspect, obsessive guilt. I blamed myself for causing a "friendship" to end and I felt the need to apologize and gain forgiveness, so to regain that lost ideal friendship. I did this "apologizing" by setting up an Aspie social group, going on TV etc.

I have often wondered if I've got it, mainly because my moods change so rapidly, but I also have pretty good impulse control.

I think I exhibit signs from time to time unfortunately.

I am not proud of it.

This is funny but prolly only to me since one shrink (way back when) gave me the DX of BPD. But I so don't fit into their classifications, it's ridiculous. First of all - I love and crave solitude. It's my mainstay. Then - I am so not impulsive. I used to be reckless - about 30 years ago, lol. Now I have to force myself to do something *curahzheh* and even then it's so mundane. Shrinks love labels like monkeys love bananas and pandas love bamboo shoots. It just goes with the territory. Now - I just laugh at the silliness of it all. Anyone with the traits just needs to get a dose of oxytocin and get some spirituality into their lives. People heal from this - and how. See also Laura Paxton.

Nothing in connection with borderline personality disorder is silly. Yes, it is a label. But it is one that describes such profound suffering and despair that I can't help but find your dismissal of it as a simple lack of copulation as offensive. I'm not going to write any more, because I can't find the words to say anything further without resorting to profanities. But please rethink your opinion of people with this disorder.